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What is wrong with dating lots of women at a time?

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Is it wrong to date lots of women at the same time

? Is there really anything wrong with dating lots of women at the same time. Why must one feel compelled to inform them. I mean if it is legal why not do it? What they do not know will not hurt them.
(edited 9 years ago)

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Reply 1
I mean relationships are supposed to be fun and spontaneous aren't they?
Original post by greatandgood
? Is there really anything wrong with dating lots of women at the same time. Why must one feel compelled to inform them. I mean if it is legal why not do it? What they do not know will not hurt them.


Kinda goes against the established norm... cheating is pretty frowned upon :P
It's kinda unfaithful to whoever you are seeing of you haven't told them :/ and makes you a bit of a man slag. But that's just my opinion :/

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costly and exhausting.
Reply 5
Original post by hellodave5
Kinda goes against the established norm... cheating is pretty frowned upon :P


Yes but surely if you are following the law. Then the rest is optional? After all it is just one persons opinion from another?
Original post by cambio wechsel
costly and exhausting.


What if it did not have to be particularly costly? Why is it "wrong"?
Reply 7
As long as all parties are aware of it and have no problem with it, I don't think it's wrong.

It's definitely wrong if you're in a relationship with someone and they don't know you're dating other people. That's cheating in my eyes.
I've always been under the impression that one woman is hard enough to please. Plus more than one would be ridiculously expensive. I have great respect for men who manage to keep more than one on the go. I've no idea how they do it.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 9
Original post by txo
As long as all parties are aware of it and have no problem with it, I don't think it's wrong.

It's definitely wrong if you're in a relationship with someone and they don't know you're dating other people. That's cheating in my eyes.


Why is it wrong? Surely it is just an alternative approach? What makes it wrong?
It is not wrong, just be honest. Don't have to say I am dating other women- but don't promise the earth to someone and claim to be exclusive if you want to keep your options open. Dating and being in a relationship are different, just make sure everyone knows the score.
Original post by ryan9900
I've always been under the impression that one woman is har enough to please. Plus more than one would be ridiculously expensive. I have great respect for men who manage to keep more than one on the go. I've no idea how they do it.


Surely from a certain viewpoint telling the person that you are also seeing someone else, would cause the most suffering?
Reply 12
Original post by greatandgood
? Is there really anything wrong with dating lots of women at the same time. Why must one feel compelled to inform them. I mean if it is legal why not do it? What they do not know will not hurt them.


How old are you? I don't mean to be patronising but 'what they don't know won't hurt them' simply does not work once you have a little life and relationship experience, trust me. It's almost hilarious, actually.

What's wrong is that you are entering into a relationship of trust, and that should go both ways. Betrayal is betrayal, it shouldn't be about them knowing or about getting 'caught', you simply should not be in such a relationship, and you shouldn't want to be in it, if you're going to crap on it like that. It's not about being cheeky or getting away with anything - it's about being mature and understanding what a real relationship is, whether they know or not, you know and it shouldn't be ok for you.

If the women know, fine - do what you like, polygamy can be great. But if they are under the impression that you are being loyal, going behind their backs is just telling of an absolutely hideous moral character. You clearly don't understand the damage that cheating can do.


inb4 a likely response - it's not an alternative viewpoint. It's a lie, a betrayal, a stab in the back to someone who is giving you themselves. If you don't know what is wrong with that and see it as just 'an alternative viewpoint', that's a deep, deep shame.
(edited 9 years ago)
If everyone involved is aware and happy with it then I guess it's alright, but even then I wouldn't recommend it. It can become very messy if gossip or any kind of jealousy gets in the way.
Reply 14
Original post by greatandgood
Why is it wrong? Surely it is just an alternative approach? What makes it wrong?


If I was in a relationship with a guy, what's the need for dating other people? If he's no longer interested, he can leave. I wouldn't want to date someone who wants to be with several women at the same time, therefore if he didn't tell me he was seeing other people, it's cheating.
Original post by awe
How old are you? I don't mean to be patronising but 'what they don't know won't hurt them' simply does not work once you have a little life and relationship experience, trust me. It's almost hilarious, actually.

What's wrong is that you are entering into a relationship of trust, and that should go both ways. Betrayal is betrayal, it shouldn't be about them knowing or about getting 'caught', you simply should not be in such a relationship, and you shouldn't want to be in it, if you're going to crap on it like that. It's not about being cheeky or getting away with anything - it's about being mature and understanding what a real relationship is, whether they know or not, you know and it shouldn't be ok for you.

If the women know, fine - do what you like, polygamy can be great. But if they are under the impression that you are being loyal, going behind their backs is just telling of an absolutely hideous moral character. You clearly don't understand the damage that cheating can do.


Why though? I mean you might want to have the benefits of both a polygamous and monogamous relationship. I think the damage of playing away as it were, is a bit overstated, yes maybe if you are married and have had children but otherwise, I think the damage maybe less than perceived.
Original post by greatandgood
Yes but surely if you are following the law. Then the rest is optional? After all it is just one persons opinion from another?


Its not against the law, but you won't find many people who would be happy with it... if you can find people, then nothing stopping you :smile:
EDIT: I think friends with benefits is the term? :P
Reply 17
Original post by txo
As long as all parties are aware of it and have no problem with it, I don't think it's wrong.

It's definitely wrong if you're in a relationship with someone and they don't know you're dating other people. That's cheating in my eyes.


This. Dating isn't exclusive imo. A relationship is.
Original post by WhimsicalSloth
If everyone involved is aware and happy with it then I guess it's alright, but even then I wouldn't recommend it. It can become very messy if gossip or any kind of jealousy gets in the way.


Again, why does everyone need to be aware of it? Surely in our diverse age, many diverse lifestyles can be lived. Freedom of choice?
Reply 19
Original post by 2ndtimeuniboy
It's kinda unfaithful to whoever you are seeing of you haven't told them :/ and makes you a bit of a man slag. But that's just my opinion :/

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This and it's just morally wrong, i don't think even Barney from HIMYM would date several girls AT THE SAME TIME

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