Do you tell your friends when they pee you off?

Anon because I have a few friends on here who this could apply to.

What I wana know is, are you always upfront when your friends intentionally or unintentionally tick you off ? With me, sometimes I may get annoyed at a certain comment but will let it pass because I don't want to create drama or make it even slightly awkward/tense and I'm generally patient and can do this multiple times but there comes a point when it builds up and I want to bring it up but feels petty / silly to drag up past instances especially when individually they might be small occurrences but together, they can form a basis for a building resentment. I've figured from now on I'm just gona say something as and when it happens as its better for the long term. Do you personally tell your friends outright when something happens?

Reply 1

PricklyPorcupine

13

Sometimes yes. If I did it all the time, then it would be 24/7 complaining about when we annoy each other

Reply 2

txo

11

It depends how much they are annoying me and how close I am to them. If they've done something that's particularly bothering me and I'm close to the person, I'll tell them straight away. But if I'm not as close to the person, I tend to care less about whatever annoys me about them, instead I just hang out with them less.

Reply 3

Inazuma

20

Depends on the situation, usually I'm pretty good at taking things so in order to really piss me off they'd have to go pretty far, in which case they would usually know they have been dumb, or yes I would tell them if it was bad enough.

Reply 4

Another

21

Not at first, no. I'll tolerate it. However if they keep doing the same thing constantly for about 6 months, then I'll snap and become really confrontational and show them indirectly that it's not on.

Usually I'll do it by picking apart flaws in their character and almost humiliating them, and I make sure to do it in a public setting/platform. It sounds bad, but they never annoy me again. It's the best method Imo :biggrin:

Reply 5

I love shopping

14

No, I never confront my friends, which is something I'm trying to change because I have a lot of resentment built up over the years! I think it's okay to let go of little things since nobody is perfect and everyone will do things to annoy you. But if it's something big I feel I should confront them, or like you said in your OP things start to build up and I end up having random outbursts!

Reply 6

coopertroopa03

10

If it was only a little comment I'd let it go but if they did something really dickish I'd probably say something. My friends never really annoy me though so I wouldn't know :redface:

Reply 7

RoseBrilliante

7

Original post by Anonymous

Anon because I have a few friends on here who this could apply to.

What I wana know is, are you always upfront when your friends intentionally or unintentionally tick you off ? With me, sometimes I may get annoyed at a certain comment but will let it pass because I don't want to create drama or make it even slightly awkward/tense and I'm generally patient and can do this multiple times but there comes a point when it builds up and I want to bring it up but feels petty / silly to drag up past instances especially when individually they might be small occurrences but together, they can form a basis for a building resentment. I've figured from now on I'm just gona say something as and when it happens as its better for the long term. Do you personally tell your friends outright when something happens?

I always tell my best friend if she continuously does something that pisses me off; in fact, I have done so in this past week. She got a bit defensive and said something along the lines of: "Oh, well, you're **** irritable and I only tolerate what you do because I like you enough to let it pass". I just wish she said to my face what I did that irritated her - she only brings it up if I do first... if that makes sense. She hates confrontation and I get that but there comes a point where the other person needs to know what you're feeling. I think it's always good to tell close friends because I wouldn't want to hang around someone who does/says things that makes me feel I want to tear my hair out, especially if they were unaware of it. But I'd make sure I do it in a tasteful way, and I'd probably expect the other person to tell me if I was irritating them, because it just affects the atmosphere when we hang out together and I hate not knowing what I did wrong.

Reply 8

MidnightDream

16

Depends how bad it was if it's not that bad I let it pass, if it is I will say something and I'm not very nice when I'm hacked off, they rarely ever annoy me anyway :smile:

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

OP

It seems a lot of people just say it as and when, then. Recently I came clean to a friend who was just over hyper all the time, couldn't read people when they just wana calm it down a bit and generally could be really in your face like all the time ( though she means no harm and is a nice person). I offloaded and told her everything that got to me which turned out to be quite an accumulation so almost felt like a character assassination but she did insist I tell her and thankfully took it really well and positively - atleast from what it seems on the surface. So from this I feel it's better to be honest however with another friend - well they're quite insecure and have confidence issues but despite this can appear to look down on people with snide judgemental remarks ( inc myself) and its hard to pass off as a joke all the time. I've tolerated this pretty much since I've known this person but more recently, I don't have that patience anymore as I generally don't like to feel negative due to such comments esp when i wouldn't be otherwise. I think they're oblivious so coupled with their confidence issues, I don't want to kick them when they're down sort of thing. Advice?

Reply 10

WhimsicalSloth

2

Unfortunately, it's easy for me to let it be known to them without my ever having said it. :tongue:

Reply 11

Safiya122

15

Not really because we all joke around like that.
And tbh like if I go quiet or whatever then they know that they've gone too far and they'll calm down then..

Reply 12

littlesocksx

5

I read the title as do your friends tell you off when you pee? Haha! But anyway I do tell them sometimes if it's constant but if it's just one time I'd probably let it go!

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 13

Chocolatesoup

13

Original post by Anonymous

Anon because I have a few friends on here who this could apply to.

What I wana know is, are you always upfront when your friends intentionally or unintentionally tick you off ? With me, sometimes I may get annoyed at a certain comment but will let it pass because I don't want to create drama or make it even slightly awkward/tense and I'm generally patient and can do this multiple times but there comes a point when it builds up and I want to bring it up but feels petty / silly to drag up past instances especially when individually they might be small occurrences but together, they can form a basis for a building resentment. I've figured from now on I'm just gona say something as and when it happens as its better for the long term. Do you personally tell your friends outright when something happens?

it depends what it is, if its something really bad that over stepped the mark then I'd bring it up, but you should always own what you say, for example say "-I- feel that when you said/did this.. it made me feel x way" that type of thing. keep saying its your opinion, because people wont respond well to "you did this to me, youre a dick" type things. depending on how strong the friendship is and what type of person they are, theyll either respond with "right okay sorry i made you feel that way, ill try to change/stop doing that" or if theyre a crappy friend theyll turn it into an argument or fall out with you, denying doing anything wrong. which isnt being a good friend because they should acknowledge that theyve p-ssed you off or hurt your feelings and try to sort things, not deny all responsibility and act immature. so it really depends on them. but good luck if you do choose to confront them, im quite a confrontational person but im trying not to be. but imo id rather tell someone whats bothering me than give them the silent treatment or be passive aggressive. cos think about it, they arent psychic, they wont change unless you make them aware of it.

Reply 14

Aivicore

16

Depends on how close to them I am.

With my best mate, we're close enough that anything annoying he does can be pointed out straight away and we'll just bitch at each other for a minute then be over it, 'cause we're like siblings and know a small argument here and there doesn't affect us in the long run. :p:

With acquaintances I find it a lot harder to say, so I'd probably either just decide to disregard it or wait until they repeat the same mistake to point it out. That said, it's pretty hard to piss me off in the first place, so it's never been *much* of a problem.

Do you tell your friends when they pee you off?

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