Hi Angela
Thank you for replying and for all the detail. I think I understand things a bit more now.
It sounds like you really cared for this boy and he obviously really cared about you. However, along the way things got difficult and other people seemed to be jealous of your happiness and tried to come between you.
I hear that you found that really hard and sometimes it led to you saying things that weren't true or not speaking to him in school. On the surface that may look like you are trying to push him away, but perhaps it was because you were just scared and confused and were not sure how best to deal with things. Sometimes when we feel like that it just seems easier to almost hide away from what is going on. Maybe you were almost also testing him in a way? Pushing him to see how he would react and how much he loved you? That may seem an odd thing to suggest but it's something to think about.
I understand that you really miss him. I am wondering how you would feel about approaching him in school to say hi, or contacting him somehow to ask if you can have a chat. Explain to him what was really going on and how you were feeling back then. He may still think that you did kiss someone else and that you were not really into him, so at least you can explain how you were feeling? It may help to write it down first so you can plan what you want to say? It may not result in you getting back together but at least you can say how you feel?
I am not sure how much this helps, but it is really good for you to be talking about how you feel,
take care
Jo