The Student Room Group

Help me interpret this conversation, please (big summary on pager 5).

Scroll to see replies

you sound a bit clingy, i read the last page
Original post by BasharAssad
lol your story was very funny when I read it the other day, well good luck


:redface: What was funny about it.

Do you mean the thread by story?
Original post by Summerdays
Three months ago ago, I randomly started talking to a girl that goes to my college; we started talking as soon as I sat next to her in a cafe at my college. We both enjoyed the conversation, so much so that we added each other on facebook. I started seeing her more regularly at the section of the library that I usually study at; I would chat to her briefly, each time I saw her.

A week later, I decided to flirt with her a bit because I didn't want her to friendzone me - I thought she was single. A few hours after flirting with her, she messaged me to inform me that she is taken. She still wanted me to be her friend, and so did I. That very same day, we both found out that we share the same MBTI personality type (INTJ); I was so excited when she told me that. Our conversations became deeper and more meaningful the second we found out.

But then the strangest thing happened the very next day... She unfriended me on facebook. At first, I assumed it was her boyfriend that made her do it. After politely asking her why was I unfriended, she told me that the reason why she unfriended me is because she wasn't sure if it was a good idea to keep in contact with me considering, in her point of view, that I liked her more than a friend. I tried my very hardest to convince her that I hd no feelings for her, and that I will prevent any feelings from ever interfering with our friendship, but she still insisted on cutting contact with me. She eventually blocked me that very same day, before unblocking me the very next day (for, largely, unknown reasons). Her reasoning is that she fears that I will develop stronger feelings for her if I keep talking to her. Yet, she still wanted us to to talk to her IN PERSON whenever I see her; she wants us to be acquaintances.

After giving her 6 weeks worth of space, I decided to facebook message her again. I informed her, in that message, that I want to tell her some things, but it would take me about a week to write them down (mainly, due to exams). In that same message, I also wrote "I hope your emotions are no longer an issue".
It was a bad move, in retrospect, because her reply was "I think we shouldn't talk in any way. And my emotions do not play a role here. Bye!" She quickly blocked me after that. I still emailed her immediately after she'd block me - I told her that "It's quite obvious that you had feelings for me; I was wondering why your personality changed on the Saturday that we last spoke." The e-mail wasn't aggressive, but I tried my best to convey disappointment.

Two months later, and she's still, very much, in my mind. She's a big WHAT IF to me - because I only knew her for 8 days. I haven't see her at all, on campus, since the day that she unfriended me. I presume that she decided to stop coming to the library that is located at the main campus.
This whole situation, admittedly, made me even more depressed than I was before I knew her. I had so many things that I wanted to discuss with her. We got on so well. I even wrote a poem about her (a week after she blocked me for the second time - I didn't sent it to her).

But please read the conversation, because this overview doesn't do the actual situation justice, I don't think.


What do you mean by flirted with her ? What exactly did you say
Original post by TSA
:redface: What was funny about it.

Do you mean the thread by story?


I got the impression that you were blaming God for your 'poor' grades (imo they were very good)
Original post by James222
What do you mean by flirted with her ? What exactly did you say


I just touched her legs and hugged her a few times, like I do with a lot of other girls. The vast majority of girls (with the exception of one) never mind it from me.
Original post by A100whoo
you sound a bit clingy, i read the last page


Trust me, I am far from clingy. What made me sound clingy in the last page?
Original post by BasharAssad
I got the impression that you were blaming God for your 'poor' grades (imo they were very good)


I guess the word 'poor' is relative to your expectations. I still kinda do though, mans probably a prick, well if he exists anyway.

Anyway this is the wrong thread for this discussion. If you want you can PM me.
Original post by James222
Fair enough. Her behaviour is abit extreme blocking really ?
Did she say anything at the time that made you think she was uncomfortable? Or did you say anything that could be interpreted as creepy did you just give the usual compliments or did you invite her back

Usually, when I am stroking the legs of a girl, they pretend as if I am not. When I did it to her, she started laughing in an uncomfortable manner... So I stopped. When I gave her a goodbye hug (that very same day) she again laughed in an uncomfortable manner. It was nothing extreme. I have done it with girls that I knew were taken, and they didn't mind.
Original post by Summerdays
Usually, when I am stroking the legs of a girl, they pretend as if I am not. When I did it to her, she started laughing in an uncomfortable manner... So I stopped. When I gave her a goodbye hug (that very same day) she again laughed in an uncomfortable manner. It was nothing extreme. I have done it with girls that I knew were taken, and they didn't mind.

Yh sounds normal
Something wrong with her probably cut you off so she could move on
Original post by James222
Yh sounds normal
Something wrong with her probably cut you off so she could move on


I even told her that I flirt a lot with women... Even more reasons not to be alarmed by what I did.
Move on, friend! You only 'knew' the girl for 8 days so it shouldn't be hard at all
You're acting very "full on" for a girl you've only known for 8 days and have no interest in romantically.
She's worried about your condition but wants nothing more to do with you. Silly of her to not say it how it is tbh. My heart actually melted at some of the points you mentioned :frown:...hope you find that friend you're looking for. Im not one to socialise much unless I truly know them, I give most a year or so of small talk and then build up (then they get to see a side nobody sees) However I found an amazing friend within just a couple of months of talking to him, there are a lot of emotions involved that ties us together tbh but friends only (hes been emotionally attached to someone before we met -.-). You'll only find what you're looking for, in a girlfriend...but don't come on so...erm clingy?

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Who?Knows
You're acting very "full on" for a girl you've only known for 8 days and have no interest in romantically.

What do you mean?
Original post by minidee6.12
She's worried about your condition but wants nothing more to do with you. Silly of her to not say it how it is tbh. My heart actually melted at some of the points you mentioned :frown:...hope you find that friend you're looking for. Im not one to socialise much unless I truly know them, I give most a year or so of small talk and then build up (then they get to see a side nobody sees) However I found an amazing friend within just a couple of months of talking to him, there are a lot of emotions involved that ties us together tbh but friends only (hes been emotionally attached to someone before we met -.-). You'll only find what you're looking for, in a girlfriend...but don't come on so...erm clingy?

Posted from TSR Mobile


despite everything I had already said she still questioned my depression by saying "May I just say that from seeing you in person you don't look like someone that is depressed. You seemed okay." And then the next thing she wrote was her final goodbye to me.
I was right. She, 21, rejected the friendship because she was dating a 17 year old, two months prior
(edited 9 years ago)
He has a companion that I always cried to have.
I only just got the confirmation today when I was on facebook
I am extremely inadequate
I was right.

Quick Reply

Latest