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Murdered by my boyfriend: help me

urghhhh
just frustrated i need to get all this agitation out.

I don't know what to do i need to vent

he says he loves me
he shouts at me
i shout at him
i sulk
he sulks
he crys
i comfort

i say ily
he says ily
he pisses me off
i yell
he yells louder
i argue
i am sarcastic
he raises his voice
he hits below the belt
i yell
i get mad
why would you hit below the belt
have some boundaries

im hurt
hes sorry
i forgive
he crys
i sulk
he comforts
i forget

he annoys me
i yell
he raises his voice
i argue more
he does not understand
i get frustrated
he lays his hands on me
my jaw drops
i yell
he yells
i cry
he apologises
he loves me
i yell
i am sarcastic
he lays his hands on me


idk what to do he laid his hands on me
i should leave him? that is easy to say
not when you see potential in someone
i rather be like the programme it self

:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::confused:

Murdered by my boyfriend ending is probably my ending one day
Reply 1
i am just depressed i wrote my life i didnt write the prgramme
the programme just looked like my life so i named it that
i should have put it in abuse forum not relatiohips i am sorry

=[ =[ =[ =[ =[
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
urghhhh
just frustrated i need to get all this agitation out.

I don't know what to do i need to vent

he says he loves me
he shouts at me
i shout at him
i sulk
he sulks
he crys
i comfort

i say ily
he says ily
he pisses me off
i yell
he yells louder
i argue
i am sarcastic
he raises his voice
he hits below the belt
i yell
i get mad
why would you hit below the belt
have some boundaries

im hurt
hes sorry
i forgive
he crys
i sulk
he comforts
i forget

he annoys me
i yell
he raises his voice
i argue more
he does not understand
i get frustrated
he lays his hands on me
my jaw drops
i yell
he yells
i cry
he apologises
he loves me
i yell
i am sarcastic
he lays his hands on me


idk what to do he laid his hands on me
i should leave him? that is easy to say
not when you see potential in someone
i rather be like the programme it self

:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::confused:

Murdered by my boyfriend ending is probably my ending one day

That was... powerful.

If this is really what is going on in your relationship, it does not sound like you are a good match. Obviously violence and abuse are not OK, but even if it were not there, you're arguing way too much. Split up so the two of you can sort your own messes out and find someone that works with you.
Leave.
Reply 4
i regret writing this :'( i just poured my whole life over the internet omg what if he finds it

i don't want this to haunt me ;'(
It is always my fault
!!!!!

I'm sorry for putting my stress on everyone else i am so sick
There's no need to apologise to any of us. Anyway, I think if you really want any hope of saving this thing you need to give him an ultimatum - lay hands on me again and this is over. And if he does, really do leave. Your safety is worth more than it.
Reply 6
This sounds like a toxic relationship for both of you. There is no excuse for him hitting you - below the belt or otherwise. Saying "I love you" occasionally doesn't negate all the screaming rows and violence.

Get away from him.
Reply 7
If you were describing your own relationship then you need to get out of it otherwise you will find you'll be on that programme yourself; and, tell as many people as you can about what happened and ask for their support. It may seem hard because it's embarrassing and your own life problems that people can't bring themselves to put out there but then people will be aware of what is happening and will be able to watch out for you. These things tend to go on for longer when no-one knows about it, because if no-one knows, no-one can look out.

Someone needs to know when alarm bells start ringing, when to raise the alarm etc like if you don't answer your phone all day or something...
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
urghhhh
just frustrated i need to get all this agitation out.

I don't know what to do i need to vent

he says he loves me
he shouts at me
i shout at him
i sulk
he sulks
he crys
i comfort

i say ily
he says ily
he pisses me off
i yell
he yells louder
i argue
i am sarcastic
he raises his voice
he hits below the belt
i yell
i get mad
why would you hit below the belt
have some boundaries

im hurt
hes sorry
i forgive
he crys
i sulk
he comforts
i forget

he annoys me
i yell
he raises his voice
i argue more
he does not understand
i get frustrated
he lays his hands on me
my jaw drops
i yell
he yells
i cry
he apologises
he loves me
i yell
i am sarcastic
he lays his hands on me


idk what to do he laid his hands on me
i should leave him? that is easy to say
not when you see potential in someone
i rather be like the programme it self

:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::confused:

Murdered by my boyfriend ending is probably my ending one day


The bold line is the only line that keeps you with him, in your eyes.

Yes, you are correct. He has potential, you definitely see the potential in him.

.....

The potential to make you the next girl to feature in that film, talking from your wooden box.
Reply 9
Thanks everyone
I just had to get what i wrote out there it was heat of the moment
i should learn from my mistakes eventually

I have decided
I will stay with him
OP, your relationship is abusive and you need to get out now. Do you have friends or family you can trust and stay with?

I suggest you call Women's Aid too. Their helpline is free and on their site online.

Sorry to hear about this :frown:
Can we not make unhelpful comments or spam the thread please


Original post by Anonymous
Thanks everyone
I just had to get what i wrote out there it was heat of the moment
i should learn from my mistakes eventually

I have decided
I will stay with him


OP please listen to the one's saying get out, the longer you stay in this relationship the worse you will be, please get out of this now, he is trying to make you feel guilty. No one deserves to be abused in a relationship.
This isn't good and I'm really worried about you... you really do need to leave the relationship and it won't be easy, but it'll be worth it. Someone else said to call Women's Aid, I'm not sure if there are any others but you definitely need to call someone and talk it through further, and he won't find it. If he regularly checks your phone, don't call from there, is there a home phone you could use?

I'm sorry, but this will only get worse if you leave it and it's hurting you..
Leave him. He has no valid reason to be laying his hands on you, if this has happened more than once then it's not an accident, leave him and don't look back.
Hi
I moderate the abuse forum and have just seen your post.
What you wrote was very powerful. It sounds like things are really scary and confusing right now, but what you are going through is abuse. It is very serious and you are not to blame, the only person responsible is him.
The programme obviously felt relevant to you, and unfortunately that is a reality for 2 women every week in this country who are killed by partners or ex-partners. I am not telling you this to scare you, but to hopefully help you understand how important it is to get support.
The good news is, you do not have to go through this alone.

There are lots of great organisations who can help you - this is a list (in fact this site is really good generally for help and support) http://thisisabuse.direct.gov.uk/need-help

If you want to private message me and tell me roughly where you live I can give you details for your local support services. It is really important that you tell people what is happening as it will help you feel better but can also keep you safer.
Does anyone else know what has been going on? Can you tell friends or family or someone at college/uni?

If you choose to leave the relationship, you need to do so safely, here are some tips:

http://www.respectnotfear.co.uk/keepingsafe/
http://refuge.org.uk/get-help-now/

It would be important to tell other people what you are planning and to not be on your own with him. You can set up a code word with your friends so they know to call the police if you say it on the phone. You may have to change your phone number and routine after leaving. This may sound scary but it is unlikely that he will change unless he wants to and gets proper professional support.

Come back here anytime if you need to talk more,
take care
Jo

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