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Is a wife entitled to her husband's money?

Husbands, in general, make a lot more than their wives as this french study shows :

In 2011 the average salary of the woman in a couple was €16,700 compared with €29,000 earned by her partner.


Should she expect him to share any of his hard earned with her and pay for things that she wants (obviously excluding anything bought for children, this is just about her). If she wants new shoes, a nice vacation, a new phone, eat out at nice restaurants etc.

Should they split the rent/mortgage/bills equally and use what's left from their salaries on themselves or is she entitled to his higher earnings?

Please discuss and as always, please stay safe.
(edited 9 years ago)

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Reply 1
She shouldn't be entitled to it but I guess since they are married they will share the money made.
Stuff like new shoes and phones I'd pay for myself. Stuff like going out for dinner or holidays (shared things) I'd split (if the earnings discrepancy was large, then split according roughly to who earns what).

I would die before I asked my boyfriend/husband to pay for a new pair of shoes :lolwut:
Reply 3
Yes, obviously when i'll get married, if i make more money than my partner, I'll live a life of "luxury" and not let him have any share of it - i.e. i'll have the last iPhone, he won't even have a smartphone if ne can't afford it without my help.
I'll also wear designer clothes; primark will be enough for him and his salary.

...se how stupid it sounds?
I'm not saying the partner earning less should spend all the money of the other, but all the expenses should be evaluated together (after the ones that are necessary for the family have been settled) and they should be balanced between the needs/desires of the husband and the wife, regardless of who is making more money.

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Reply 4
Original post by Arieh
Yes, obviously when i'll get married, if i make more money than my partner, I'll live a life of "luxury" and not let him have any share of it - i.e. i'll have the last iPhone, he won't even have a smartphone if ne can't afford it without my help.
I'll also wear designer clothes; primark will be enough for him and his salary.

...se how stupid it sounds?
I'm not saying the partner earning less should spend all the money of the other, but all the expenses should be evaluated together (after the ones that are necessary for the family have been settled) and they should be balanced between the needs/desires of the husband and the wife, regardless of who is making more money.

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So you're saying a marriage is give and take and if one needs something from the other then he/she should expect their partner to share this ''resource'' ?
Reply 5
Original post by StevieA
marriage is give and take and if one needs something from the other then he/she should expect their partner to share this ''resource'' ?


Correct
Don't worry, this financial arrangement will not happen in our generation. The age of the joint account is passing. My advice to a newly married husband is never to get a joint account, if possible not to share a mortgage, and not to make a habit of paying for his wife's purchases (holidays yes, shoes no). This should presumably limit exposure in a divorce.

It would be nice if couples could be a bit more relaxed than this about sharing income but unfortunately the divorce laws make it too big a risk.
Reply 7
Original post by StevieA
So you're saying a marriage is give and take and if one needs something from the other then he/she should expect their partner to share this ''resource'' ?


Err.. Yes? Otherwise what's the point of marriage (and relationships in general), if it's not supporting/caring for each other?

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Well what's his is mine and what's mine is also mine :giggle:

Seriously though it's like you put all the money in a pot so really it's not anybody's and you just share it accordingly it's not I earn 40 and he earns 50 it's we both earn 90
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 9
Original post by Reue
Correct


This thread is a parallel to another issue that happens very often in modern western marriages. A certain ''resource'' men require much more of (in most cases) yet a huge percentage of wives are unwilling to share.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 10
yes because she'll be at home raising our children and cleaning our house

semi srs
Reply 11
Original post by StevieA
This thread is a parallel to another issue that very often in modern western marriages. A certain ''resource'' men require much more of (in most cases) yet a huge percentage of wives are unwilling to share.


What are you on about
Original post by Reue
What are you on about


He means SEX :mmm:
Reply 13
Original post by Viva Emptiness
He means SEX :mmm:


I assumed that, but just wanted to check he wasnt comparing that to an actual need like food and shelter :rolleyes:
Original post by StevieA
This thread is a parallel to another issue that happens very often in modern western marriages. A certain ''resource'' men require much more of (in most cases) yet a huge percentage of wives are unwilling to share.


Sex and Money are two very different things. Don't be so stupid. You are bringing down the IQ of the entire human race.
Original post by Reue
I assumed that, but just wanted to check he wasnt comparing that to an actual need like food and shelter :rolleyes:


Nope, you were right. He was :sigh:
Reply 16
Original post by StevieA
So you're saying a marriage is give and take and if one needs something from the other then he/she should expect their partner to share this ''resource'' ?

Marriage is not give and take. Its about sharing. Its about love and understanding. Marriage is not about who earns more, its not about partner show off to each other who earns more.

Family is where both parties make sacrificessacrifices... Its not 2 people living in one house, have sex at night and live separate lives.

When two people get married the become one. One family. There should be one budget, family budget. In addition, not everything is measured in earnings. Maybe wife working part time earning less but at the same time looking after the house? So she shouldn't be entitled to but 1 designer pair of shoes from family budget, because if we calculate, her earning will be enough only for food??

Is that what people call family these days? And what if husband loses his job, but wife earning enough for family? She should divorce him? She has money no need husband without money for himself?

As I said family / marriage is love. You love your child that's why you feed the baby, buy nappies and clothing.

About the main question. In my opinion, feeling entitled is a bad thing. But family is for sharing, if both partities are happy about the decision eg. Buying a shoes, then there is a no problem. I believe high amount of purchases should be discussed first then bought.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 17
Money between married couples should be completely shared. It's stupid if one partner is like "I earnt this money myself so I'm spending on myself and you can't touch it'

For ages I supported my boyfriends petrol costs because he wasn't earning. I have even lent/given money to his mum and dad out my earnings. But we don't see it like that though, everything gets put together.
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Reply 18
Original post by StevieA
Husbands, in general, make a lot more than their wives as this french study shows :



Should she expect him to share any of his hard earned with her and pay for things that she wants (obviously excluding anything bought for children, this is just about her). If she wants new shoes, a nice vacation, a new phone, eat out at nice restaurants etc.

Should they split the rent/mortgage/bills equally and use what's left from their salaries on themselves or is she entitled to his higher earnings?

Please discuss and as always, please stay safe.


If any man needs to ask this question he should not be with a woman. Of course she is just as is the case vice versa, if you cant share why marry
Reply 19
Of course, if you get married you are both earning to contribute to the family, not for yourselves. If you don't want that don't get married. I mean seriously, she should pay for her own holidays? "Honey, I am taking the kids holiday to spain for a couple of weeks. Don't be silly of course you can't come, you can't afford it"

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