Guys, Has this ever happened to you? Guy/Girls, what do I do about it?

I don't understand girls who refuse to approach guys..
But then there is always the fear that you've misread the signs and that they're not into you at all.
As an example, the other day on the bus there was a guy that was clearly checking me out. We were on the bus for an hour and fifteen minutes, during which time I debated whether I should go up to him or not. It ended with us both going our separate ways, simply because I couldn't muster up the courage to go up to him. So perhaps consider the fact that she could have been just as nervous as you are.

Possibly they've been cases where the girl is as nervous. Don't think I've ever had it where the girl has tried to initiate conversation and it seems the way society is I'm unlikely to as I think women just see it as down to the bloke. Even saying hello seems odd if you don't know the girl so I'm guess I'm wondering if anyone has an easy opener to break the deadlock here?

do you not have a common ground at all?

As in? I mean if its not a girl I've never met or seen before.

Hi I'm a guy and I tend to get these situations every so often where a girl eyes you up and vice versa but kind of stands there I'm guessing waiting for you to chat to her without saying anything. However, since the girl is almost always a total stranger and it happens unexpectedly on the hoof as it were out of the blue I am often found wanting for finding something to say. Needless to say the thought of trying to chat to a stranger whom you know nothing about without coming across as a wierdo or inappropriate/awkward because you don't know her is difficult when faced with the situation.

I often find that the girl can also become quickly p*ssed off looking as no conversation has been forth coming despite her making no effort herself which makes the situation even harder. After a while she often leaves in a huff or one of us just moves of events move on. Just wondering if any guys on here have had this happen to them? and guy/girls any ideas on how to handle it? i.e way to go about iniating conversation or something? Just also wondering why girls seem to look so p*ssed if nothing is happening, don't they know that its a kind of pressure that's difficult on the guy and really I think a two way thing communicationwise?

If you make eye contact then smile and try and use that as an 'ice breaker'? If she smiles back then approach her and say something about her smile/eyes?

lol happens to me all the time. I just don't care and carry on with my day. They can approach me if it's a big deal for them.

You need to think in advance about ways to break the ice with people, it also depends on the situation.

If you're at work, in a shop or on the bus or something and your interested in getting their number/talking to them then you need to do/say something that they will remember tell a bad joke and apologise and laugh about it being so bad. Ask an odd question that they won't be expecting like if you had to choose, what would you say is your favourite type of dinosaur? It seems strange and it will put some people off you but the way I see it is that I'm a person with a sense of humour and would like to spend my time talking to people who also have a good sense of humour. If talk to a girl and it turns out she takes herself mega seriously and is just looking for a trophy pull for the night then (tbh, depends how attractive she is yano...) I'm not really interested. I was donating blood the other day and while I was sitting waiting an attractive blonde woman who looked a little older than me asked me to stand so she could get past to sit down. When she sat next to me I said hi (literally just "HI") and was going to mention how damn hot it was in there, he instant reaction was to, without even looking up from the magazine she was holding, raise her left hand to show an engagement ring and said "I'm engaged" and continued reading. Rude ass mother Fer. You will sometimes get reactions like that, in that case just drop it yano?

Tailoring your language/approach according to their reaction is important. If you're looking to get laid and you open with a joke and get a bad reaction then just start being more direct flirty like going to grab her hand or asking to go dance (in a night club for example). If a girl says yes to going to dance with you then generally speaking that = Holding hands -> dancing -> grinding -> intimate touching -> kissing -> make your way back to someone's bedroom. Not all the time obviously.

If you're looking to get a phone number/a date at like a bar or supermarket or something, its a good bet to start with a question. Ask them to recomend the worst drink they can think of at the bar, ask them if they know how the hell you cook a Zuccucini and where to find one if your at the supermarket for example. People, especially women, bump into so many other people in any given day that you need to stand out and be memorable for some reason. Engaging in a conversation about some sort of bizarre vegetable can be a good way to get attention and then tell a terrible joke and apologise. If shes interested then she will engage in the conversation with you and answer your questions/laugh and cringe ar your joke (that doesnt always mean she FANCIES YOU, just that shes a nice enough person to humour you. Use some common sense). Complain about something silly like having lost your shopping list and that you're screwed because you lost a bet with your friend and now have to make him a romantic dinner, something silly like that.

Meander the conversation from that point to asking if she is busy later on/the next day/if it would be ok to get her phone number. Joke about needing her assistance again next time you go shopping or something.


Bare in mind people don't always react well to being hassled, if the initial response to your attention isn't positive or encouraging then respect their privacy and leave 'em alone.


picking up the ladies101

Thank you for your help, it could be useful, I don't tend to have a real off the wall sense of humour though, guess I could try, I guess I have a more cynical sense of humour which I'm not sure would help as it may seem a bit distasteful to women. Often I'm a bit stumped for something to say, particularly humour. Tend to find these situations happen more on the street kind if randomly than in bars, i.e so you could be walking down the high street and then see someone giving you the eye say coming out of a shop, stood around with friends if you know what I mean.

Would seem strange that it does not bother you, why would you want to pass up on someone you might be very attracted to/attractive. If both parties do nothing then surely both are missing out on a relationship that might give each other a better life?

"What do you call a fish with no eye?

Fsh.


Oh man, I immediately regret that, I apologise for exposing you to such nonesense."

Awful and cheesy as frig jokes. Personally if a girl i sput off me because of silly jokes Im not interested anyway yano?

By that point, they either like you or hate you. I also find starting with terrible jokes gives you good ammunition for conversation via text for the few first days.