The Student Room Group

My Porn Addiction: Especially for you Muslim brothers

Please anon or delete.

Assallamu Alaikum brothers and sisters (If there are sisters reading this may not be exactly but if you were addicted too please read on)

Ramadan has passed and Eid is finally here, so Eid Mubarak and I pray all your good deeds are accepted by Allah. I know its Eid and it's not the time for this sort of discussion but there is a very important reason it has to be today, which i will explain at the end.

I have always classed myself as a Muslim but I have battled a strong addiction to pornography. You may be reading this thinking I'm just pathetic but trust me you really don't know how deep you're in it until you're finally out.

Like many of you i was introduced to this sort of material by someone I trusted at a very young age. I'm not blaming him, I just want you to know I started the same way as many of you.

For the next 6 years the material became more depraved (not too depraved mind. I wasn't a monster... stuff most of you have actively searched for atleast once) and frequent. I would seriously estimate I was watching 1-2 hours of porn a day (Ever watched porn without jacking it? get in here you're addicted) and it has damn near ruined my life.

It would plague my mind during salat, I would do it instead of going out with friends, I would say I was revising and use it to excuse my haram acts. I wouldn't speak in class, just incase I let slip with a porno term (srs) and always had sexual thoughts about girls. My head was just a clouded emptiness (I was always fairly intelligent but people were seeing me turn into a mindless drone). I grew further and further apart from Allah and drifted into a place where i was a kafir and only pretended to be Muslim to my family and friends. But how could I possibly be a Muslim with this dark secret? How was it fair that a righteous Muslim girl was going to be stuck with such a disgusting husband?

Then Ramadan came. 'Damn I wont be able to jack off for a month'. As Allah is my witness that Is all I thought. I didn't see how much of a blessing ramadan could possibly be. Even during the first 2 weeks I was itching for it to end. My only regret is that I wasted so much of Ramadan.

Now many of you are probably becoming disinterested by this already. Probably searching the latest discussions for another AMA (please stop these AMAs btw) but please bare with me.

Now that Ramadan has finished, you've gone a month without porn (Hopefully) you beast of a man. You are almost free from it, almost because now that Ramadan is over, it will be much easier to slip back into the same routine but please. So brother please take control of your life,just stop. Delete your browser history, put child protection software on your laptop, literally anything to stop you falling back into it. I promise you it will plague you in this life and Allah has promised you that It'll plague you in the next life as well.

Now why today? well you will definitely not be watching it today (i hope) but you may slip back tomorrow, or the day after, or the day after that. You won't though because you're strong and you can fight this.
I have hopefully defeated my demons and hopefully can claim myself to be a member of Islam again. I can't tell you how great it is to have my brain functioning again, to be able to communicate with my loved ones and to perform salat properly. I sincerely hope you can do it too.

Take care brothers.
Original post by Anonymous
Please anon or delete.

Assallamu Alaikum brothers and sisters (If there are sisters reading this may not be exactly but if you were addicted too please read on)

Ramadan has passed and Eid is finally here, so Eid Mubarak and I pray all your good deeds are accepted by Allah. I know its Eid and it's not the time for this sort of discussion but there is a very important reason it has to be today, which i will explain at the end.

I have always classed myself as a Muslim but I have battled a strong addiction to pornography. You may be reading this thinking I'm just pathetic but trust me you really don't know how deep you're in it until you're finally out.

Like many of you i was introduced to this sort of material by someone I trusted at a very young age. I'm not blaming him, I just want you to know I started the same way as many of you.

For the next 6 years the material became more depraved (not too depraved mind. I wasn't a monster... stuff most of you have actively searched for atleast once) and frequent. I would seriously estimate I was watching 1-2 hours of porn a day (Ever watched porn without jacking it? get in here you're addicted) and it has damn near ruined my life.

It would plague my mind during salat, I would do it instead of going out with friends, I would say I was revising and use it to excuse my haram acts. I wouldn't speak in class, just incase I let slip with a porno term (srs) and always had sexual thoughts about girls. My head was just a clouded emptiness (I was always fairly intelligent but people were seeing me turn into a mindless drone). I grew further and further apart from Allah and drifted into a place where i was a kafir and only pretended to be Muslim to my family and friends. But how could I possibly be a Muslim with this dark secret? How was it fair that a righteous Muslim girl was going to be stuck with such a disgusting husband?

Then Ramadan came. 'Damn I wont be able to jack off for a month'. As Allah is my witness that Is all I thought. I didn't see how much of a blessing ramadan could possibly be. Even during the first 2 weeks I was itching for it to end. My only regret is that I wasted so much of Ramadan.

Now many of you are probably becoming disinterested by this already. Probably searching the latest discussions for another AMA (please stop these AMAs btw) but please bare with me.

Now that Ramadan has finished, you've gone a month without porn (Hopefully) you beast of a man. You are almost free from it, almost because now that Ramadan is over, it will be much easier to slip back into the same routine but please. So brother please take control of your life,just stop. Delete your browser history, put child protection software on your laptop, literally anything to stop you falling back into it. I promise you it will plague you in this life and Allah has promised you that It'll plague you in the next life as well.

Now why today? well you will definitely not be watching it today (i hope) but you may slip back tomorrow, or the day after, or the day after that. You won't though because you're strong and you can fight this.
I have hopefully defeated my demons and hopefully can claim myself to be a member of Islam again. I can't tell you how great it is to have my brain functioning again, to be able to communicate with my loved ones and to perform salat properly. I sincerely hope you can do it too.

Take care brothers.

I would love to help you and you're slowly getting there. Try going a day, then a week without doing it. I'm a girl and i watch porn in some occasions too. Maybe speak more x?
Check out www.mytazkiyah.com. They are a muslim organisation who help muslims struggling with porn and sex addiction.

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