I rejected someone I shouldn't have, now I feel really bad

I'm an average girl, I'm not pretty and I have a boring personality and I don't want to hurt anyone. I've never had any experiences of dating or relationships and I went to co-ed school and I didn't really speak to any of the guys there because most seemed immature.
Well this is a long story, so I'll try to keep things as short as possible. I started last year(doing a female dominated course but there are also a lot of guys) and I met my first male friend. He's so sweet it's unreal. He's quite small(a bit smaller than me and I consider myself small) and he looks cute. He is a really sweet person too. Like he's so kind, holds the door for everyone, always makes sure everyone is ok, always smiles. It seems weird but I always wanted to hug him, I didn't get to in the end. He seems nervous a lot of the time with everyone and is really quiet and shy. I don't think he has any other female friends. He went to an all boys school and I'm the only girl in the course he properly speaks to.
Near the end of the year, he asked me in private if I wanted to take things further and I was hesitant so I said no. Now I feel really bad. We didn't talk after that and he seemed really scared. I think it was a big thing for him to start talking to me, never mind to get to the stage of asking. I admit I was thinking what would people think if a girl that looks 20 years old is with a guy that looks 13.
Last time I saw him I was during exam time on a bus and he was walking to the library with the usual smile on his face. Now I'm upset that we haven't spoken in the holidays ever since, and I feel that I lost a friend. How do I make things ok again in terms of friendship? I've never been in a situation before. Like I said I'm a simple person and I don't want to hurt anyone.

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Reply 1

Clip

Original post by Anonymous

You don't.

You rejected him because he wasn't good enough for you, and then expected him to be jellyfish enough to carry on being your bezzie.

If you don't mind going out with him, you can call him up, say you made a mistake and actually do want to go out with him (and all that entails), or you come to terms with him being outta there.

Reply 2

Phoebe Buffay

So, do you actually want to take things further with this guy? Or are you just feeling bad that you hurt his feelings, but actually you just want to be friends?

Reply 3

Smxth

You should've gone out with him because you feel sorry for him... :wink:

Seriously it doesn't sound like you've done anything wrong and this guy needs to grow some balls and man the **** up.... If you feel bad just go and talk to him try to get past it, if he can't get over it then that's his problem and not yours.

Reply 4

goobypls

You forever friend zoned the poor guy :frown:

Reply 5

tim3

Original post by goobypls

You forever friend zoned the poor guy :frown:

LAWL

Reply 6

joker12345

It's an awful situation, but look, he did the right thing for himself - if he had feelings for you he needed to distance himself to get over them. If you want to date him then tell him, but if not let it go.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by goobypls

You forever friend zoned the poor guy :frown:

I haven't. Stop making me feel bad. I just hope he's ok. He might think I don't care about him when that isn't true. I think about him a lot.

Reply 8

snailsareslimy

Original post by Anonymous

I haven't. Stop making me feel bad. I just hope he's ok. He might think I don't care about him when that isn't true. I think about him a lot.

For the love of god, don't tell him that. It'll only confuse the hell out of him :lol:

Sounds like you're confused to what you want. Don't talk to him until you've clarified what you want from him. It's unfair.

Reply 9

goobypls

Original post by Anonymous

I haven't. Stop making me feel bad. I just hope he's ok. He might think I don't care about him when that isn't true. I think about him a lot.

The love is real between you two. Tie the knot.

Reply 10

Spongebob'sPants

Original post by Anonymous

I haven't. Stop making me feel bad. I just hope he's ok. He might think I don't care about him when that isn't true. I think about him a lot.

Do you want to date him?

If not, then maybe its better to let things be for a while.

Perhaps he is embarrassed to be around you right now. Perhaps he needs time to get over you.

If it bothers you that much, just shoot him a text asking how he is. That way you're leaving it in his court.

Reply 11

anonymouspie227

That sounds awful. :frown:

everybody lost out
Do you want to be in a relationship with this guy? If you do then see if you can patch things up before he moves on

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

A lot of people are asking if I want to have a relationship with this guy and I don't know if I do right now. I'm really self-conscious about what other people think and as I mentioned he looks about 13. What will people think when they see me with him? I was thinking should I wait until he ages? I know it sounds horrible, but that's what I'm thinking right now. Other than that as I described he's too sweet and yes I'd want a serious relationship.

Reply 13

KingStannis

You're not, as far as I can tell, interested in this guy emotionally, so you have nothing to feel sorry about.

He probably only has a crush on you because you're the only girl he speaks to tbh.

Reply 14

93jm

Original post by Anonymous

if you want to go out with him don't let what others think affect that and for all you know he might always look young if you want to go out with him then do it if not don't

Reply 15

joker12345

Original post by Anonymous

This is ridiculous. People aren't going to care, and anyway the people who know you will know how old he really is! You can't just 'wait till he ages' - you'll have hurt him and he'll probably (at least, hopefully) have moved on by them. A relationship is about the two of you, if you like him and don't want to lose him get over yourself, apologise and tell him how you feel.

Reply 16

Carterj09

Original post by Anonymous

Theres no point having a "serious" relationship with someone if you do not love them, and you obviously dont love him, because if you did you would not care what other people thought, you'd want nothing more than to show him of to everyone you see because he is yours

Reply 17

Guy Secretan

You sound over sensitive if you rejected him that's fair enough just start talking again and say you wanna remain friends.

Reply 18

ilem

He did the right thing by cutting you out. Good on him.

Reply 19

khalmi

He was probably only friends with you to begin with because he was attracted to you. You don't have to date him, but he is not going to be your friend. Don't go talk to him and try to be friends again, he will most probably say cool, and just try to avoid you. Boys and girls are rarely actual friends.