Hello Jo
I am very worried right now.
Long story short but my counselors are concerned about my younger siblings after I expressed my past - I was abused in childhood. As a result, they think that getting the social services is the action to take but they are aware that my safety is paramount and they need to handle this sensitively.
Other professionals I have previously seen about the abuse - doctors, CBT therapist, etc - has also expressed the same concern and have wither tried to get the social services involved or wanted to.
I am seeing one of my counselors at the moment and the plan is to get the social services involved when I go back to university in September - unless anything happens to my siblings now, then in that case the social services will have to get involved now.
The 1st plan is what we are sticking to for now, and I have been seeing my counselor since I came home for the holidays. I was hoping that the referral made could made anonymous so that my parents would not know that I was the one behind the whole thing. My counselor has been trying to find this out for me and he has been trying to get clarity. The social services have not been clear about things but he has the impression that he would not be able to make an anonymous referral as he is making the referral as a professional. Also, the whole process and the laws surrounding social services makes everything complicated.
I am starting to have doubts because I am worried that if the referral is made, I could be potential danger. However, I promised myself and my counselors that I would co-operate and I would be on board with the whole thing - as long as this situation could be handled sensitively and I would not be exposed in any way as the person behind this situation. At the same time I was also hoping to cut off contact from my parents in the future and I thought getting the social services involved would be one way to do this.
Also, my counselor and I are aware that there have been changes in the law in terms of safeguarding - if a professional knew that a child was at risk but did nothing then they could be criminally liable. So if my counselor did nothing then he could be in trouble.
I know if could opt out of the whole thing but I am often having therapy and receiving support after what happened to me, and I know that every professional I speak to will first and foremost want to get the social services involved, so the safeguarding issue is not something anyone can avoid, even if I try to keep my mouth shut. Almost every single professional I have ever spoken to has always mentioned getting the social services involved.
I feel disappointed in myself. I want to do something but I am scared of the outcomes. But I don't want to let myself down or my counselor down. Even though I kind of have a plan in place I am still scared of the outcomes.
I also don't want to let my friend down. She knows about this situation and she has said "don't give up, be persistent, do the right thing, and get some support along the way." I am not normally a quitter but I am so worried about this whole situation that I feel like giving up even though I don't want to.
What do I do now?
Just to add, there have been 3 referrals to the social services. The first 2 times my parents did not know about. The third referral was after I tried to take my life at the age of 17. The doctors at the hospital had to make a referral because it was part of their procedures, and because they became extremely concerned for my siblings and I.