I Can't do this ANYMORE!!!!

I am getting upset as usual about my strange life. The main issue is that i want to go to university so that i can never ever see my family and hopefully get proper friends but for the past 2 years, i have always either get kicked out of college because of anxiety or that everyone sees me as a weird ****.

I hate my family with a passion. They forced me to spend three weeks in Nigeria which is currently giving me some sort of manic thoughts and they ****ing treat me like a prick. I was meant to be going uni this year but no i got kicked out of college this January.

Can someone, ANYBODY, give me ideas on this forum to leave my family forever or just find ways on how to get university in a quicker rate as my time living in my family or in London where i live is way past it's expiry date.

Do you mean you failed college, and you attribute this failure to anxiety and being a social outcast?

Also, what did you study at college, and what do you want to study? Perhaps the course you were in did not best match with your talents.

I studied music twice. this september im going to study an access course in business but i know this is going to fail because i am seen as a social outcast anywhere i go

Why are you seen as a social outcast? What abnormal behaviors do you display?

Are you having treatment for your anxiety?

How does being quiet negatively affect your studies? If anything it should be the opposite.

because it just does with people. maybe because im such a loser. i can't really explain it