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4 Potential Fathers :/ Should any of them be in my boy's life???

Now before I start this is not a troll and I would love serious responses from both genders.

I'm 20 and I have got a 6 month old baby boy named Jack and I live in London. Unfortunately due to my promiscuous ways I got knocked up at age 19 on my gap year before I wanted to go Uni. While partying and the group of people I hang around with Sex is a constant/was a constant. My first time at 17 was safe and protected but at 19 I wanted to feel the D bare:colondollar:. I had sex with a guy I met in a Starbucks after he chatted me up and was pretty good looking(yes I know this is not good but I was/am that type of a girl and I was naive) I went to a party the next day with some friends and I had unprotected sex with 2 guys at different points in my friends house that night. The next week I also had sex at a party with another guy so that realistically makes it 4 potential fathers...

Now before calling me a slut or a slag I just really like sex and I don't just have sex at every opportunity though - I am probably dependent on sex but I am not a slag or a slut so please don't call me that. I am smart I got 12 GCSE's and a AABC at AS level, but in my personality I just love sex and I have lost a lot of friends over this issue but my family have supported me and I will be changing my ways and find a stable guy and not just have sex with any hottie that I see.

Finally, the reason I am doing this thread is for advice as 2 of the guys were just hunky and not people I would want to bring a child up with, so should I allow the father in my boy's life when I get the DNA results in 2 and a half weeks?

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Original post by Anonymous
I am smart I got 12 GCSE's and a AABC at AS level

That doesn't make you smart, academics only get you so far and you are rather stupid and lack common sense. Also 2 guys in one night and they both came in you? Disgusting.

Did you get DNA from the potential fathers before doing the DNA test?
Yes it'd probably be in the child's best interest to know his father


Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by tehFrance
Did you get DNA from the potential fathers before doing the DNA test?


Exactly, because surely if you got their DNA then they already know what's going on, so you'll be putting them in the picture either way?

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by tehFrance
x


Aren't you the guy who used to go around TSR bragging about when he slept with prostitutes?
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by tehFrance
That doesn't make you smart, academics only get you so far and you are rather stupid and lack common sense. Also 2 guys in one night and they both came in you? Disgusting.

Did you get DNA from the potential fathers before doing the DNA test?


The last guy I had sex with looks like the father as Jack looks like him and he's the only one I am on speaking terms with and the only one who I was able to contact for a DNA test.
The fact that you like sex is not a good defence for giving a boy a disadvantage from the start by creating him from four possible men none of which sound responsible or likely to be interested in his upbringing. I would try to find a stable man to contain the damage.
Original post by Birkenhead
The fact that you like sex is not a good defence for giving a boy a disadvantage from the start by creating him from four possible men none of which sound responsible or likely to be interested in his upbringing. I would try to find a stable man to contain the damage.


This.

Besides if you're not on speaking terms with the other 3 and this one guy you are in contact with turns out not be the father, I don't know how you're going to be able to involve that father in the child's life anyway or find out who he actually is.
Jeremy Kyle is your answer.

I won't be surprised if the results were announced and he says "Neither of you 4 men are the father".
Original post by Anonymous
The last guy I had sex with looks like the father as Jack looks like him and he's the only one I am on speaking terms with and the only one who I was able to contact for a DNA test.

I presume you used a semen sample? :teehee:

If he's not the father then problem is sorted, yes? Likewise if he is?
Where are the feminists?
Original post by NikolaT
Where are the feminists?


Why this bait in every single thread?! It's old, already. :sigh:
Original post by Nav_Mallhi
Jeremy Kyle is your answer.

I won't be surprised if the results were announced and he says "Neither of you 4 men are the father".


No he's not and well thanks for the rudeness
Damn. Well, if he's the father, yes.
Original post by tehFrance
I presume you used a semen sample? :teehee:

If he's not the father then problem is sorted, yes? Likewise if he is?


:biggrin: I would love for him to be the father not only because he is the only one I am on speaking terms with, he actually has a steady education and fantastic job prospects and more importantly the way he acts and conducts himself, would make him a great father to my boy!

If he's not then I guess I will have to get in contact with the other 3 and make a decision whether they should be involved.
That's what you think. I think it's the answer.
I'm not being rude, I'm just suggesting another possibility.
Original post by Anonymous
x


:hugs:

I don't even know what to say. But here goes.

Congratulations on having a child (I'm sure you don't often get that response)

I think whoever the childs father ends up being should have an opportunity to be involved in his upbringing.
That being said there's always the chance that they'll not want anything to do with Jack. I don't know what the legal aspect of it is.

But perhaps you should consider just focussing on how best you'll raise your child. Plenty of women raise children single handedly, and you may find another partner in the future etc too, but currently you're the only one in the picture so perhaps just plan for it to stay that way, as a just in case measure.
Sounds like the plot to a Mamma Mia remake set in Croydon


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Where in London does all this happen :hump:
Original post by anonymouspie227
:hugs:

I don't even know what to say. But here goes.

Congratulations on having a child (I'm sure you don't often get that response)

I think whoever the childs father ends up being should have an opportunity to be involved in his upbringing.
That being said there's always the chance that they'll not want anything to do with Jack. I don't know what the legal aspect of it is.

But perhaps you should consider just focussing on how best you'll raise your child. Plenty of women raise children single handedly, and you may find another partner in the future etc too, but currently you're the only one in the picture so perhaps just plan for it to stay that way, as a just in case measure.


The legal aspect is as follows:

If he doesn't want to be part of the child's life, as much as the law considers that it is important for a child to get know both parents, he cannot be forced to have contact with Jack. However the biological father will be required to pay maintenance (although this depends on his income and if he does not earn enough (so that paying maintenance for the child would take him below a certain level of income) he will not be ordered to pay anything by the Child Maintenance Service).

If the OP doesn't want the father to be part of the child's life but the father wants to be part of the child's life, the law thinks extremely highly of contact. This is because there is a presumption in favour of a child knowing both parents. Therefore the OP would need to allow reasonable contact. If the OP does not, potentially the father could apply to the court's for a child arrangement order.
(edited 9 years ago)

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