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I've been going out with my girlfriend for over a year, for about 12 months of that she has been away on placement. The past few month have been very busy (exams, placement, etc) and we haven't really seen each other. When she comes back to her university it will be the first time that we are living in the same city for an extended period of time. I am currently unemployed and looking for a job in the said city (recently graduated).

There is a very real prospect that she will possible move for further study after her undergraduate degree is over. I said that if that was the case that I would be willing to look for jobs around the area that she might move too.

Her argument is those statement are putting too much pressure on her and she thinks that longer term plans will ruin the time that we have currently in the same city.

I can see her argument, however my position is that I have a wider availability of possible employment compared to her and therefore it is easier for me to move. I have discussed this at length with her but there never seems to be a satisfactory conclusion. The argument keep rearing it's head every once in a while.

My question is, should I just let it drop and enjoy this year as best I can or make the point that what she said was one, if not the most hurtful thing I've ever been told and that if she can't see us lasting more than a year then what's the point.
Reply 1
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GingerJoe
OP
11
Anyone?
Sounds like she doesn't want to get your hopes up and would rather wait a bit longer to make that decision together
Reply 3
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GingerJoe
OP
11
That's fair enough. I mean I'm not going to follow her around the country but if I see a job in a certain location that is one that I think I will enjoy, I'm not going to not apply for it just because she is there.
Enjoy it for now and see how it goes, if she's likely to look at postgraduate studies she'll probably think about that firstly and relationships second. If you're still happy in a few weeks/months when she needs to make those kinds of decisions, go from there about employment. For now I'd focus on work locally to where you are, you can always quit/move/follow her to where she ends up when you get a job there/etc at a later stage next year.
Reply 5
Avatar for GingerJoe
GingerJoe
OP
11
I am enjoying it, I am perfectly aware that it may or may not work in the long run. However, I like her quite a lot and thought it was normal going into a relationship to at least think that it was going to work out (obvious exceptions a side).

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