I want to Dump my Boyfriend Nicely

I’ve been dating this guy for the last six months. We’ve said “I love you” and things were great during the first 3 months of the relationship. After that, things started to go downhill. He started becoming paranoid and thinking that I was flirting with other guys, that I didn’t like him as much as he liked me, etc.
I have been faithful the whole time and have not been “shopping around”, but after that three month mark he became clingy and desperate. I don’t want to sound heartless, but I started to lose my attraction to him.
He’s a good guy, I care for him, but I’ve made up my mind that we should no longer be dating. Can you give me some advice on the best way to break up with my boyfriend?

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Reply 1

cheeriosarenice

Original post by Anonymous

Buy him an Xbox.

Reply 2

SummerAnthems

To the face, somewhere neutral.
"<INSERT NAME>, I'm sorry but its not working out, I think we should go separate ways."

There's no easy way to do it.

Reply 3

EXTREMEninja

Original post by Anonymous

Perhaps you could discuss what he is doing that you don't like, you know, talk to him about it. Rather than jumping to 'breaking up'. Of course, if you have already talked about it, then just tell him the truth about why you are breaking up. Try and phrase it nicely, but the truth is usually better than some sugarcoated excuse :smile:

Reply 4

_Fergo

Original post by SummerAnthems

To the face, somewhere neutral.
"<INSERT NAME>, I'm sorry but its not working out, I think we should go separate ways."

There's no easy way to do it.

Unfortunately this is correct.

It's not like you broke his PS4, in which case you could put it nicely.

It's a relationship and you need to speak it up straight ahead.

Reply 5

penelopecat

Just dont do it via text or call. Face to face.

Xbox lol

Face to face

When I broke up with my boyfriend we were just talking and then he started talking about something in the future and I just said "I'm sorry, I can't see this working out, I think we should end it here" or something to that effect. He was oblivious which kind of just summed up our relationship anyway. It's not the breaking up that's hard, it's dealing with the aftermath of texts and desperate pleas to meet up (I'm not knocking him, I did the same to an ex before.. You only realise how annoying you're being when someone does it to you!).

Reply 9

Alfissti

"Please sit down, this will be quick. Now (insert name) you've been a great guy to be around however I don't see a future of us together therefore I feel we should go our separate ways before things get ugly between us." Turn around and say "Good bye"

Reply 10

Zarek

No easy way, but:

- face to face
- avoid a period of being off with him before the dumping
- avoid cliches and be as honest as possible
- acknowledge the good times
- offer one last compensatory bonk
- don't be horrible to him post break up unless he drives you to it

These would have helped me in that situation in the past. Not absolutely serious about the second last one, although its an interesting concept. Good luck.

Reply 11

Gouki

Original post by LavenderBlueSky88

You also realise they cared as little about you as you do about the person you dumped

Reply 12

Atheism

To the people saying face-to-face:

What if that wasn't an option? Say in an LDR, if it's going to be a long time I would much prefer to be told over the phone than strung along just for a face-to-face break up.

But in answer to the thread - just be honest and straightforward.

Reply 13

Rosie06

Always best to talk about your differences first before having breaking up as your first option. But if you feel like you're not attracted to him much anymore or you two can't come to a compromise about your differences, then just sit him down and be completely honest and end it that way, but don't be too harsh with words :P

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Reply 14

Scott.M

Original post by LavenderBlueSky88

Tbf if he was oblivious and it came out of the blue, it is rather cold and heartless to not agree to meet up - the least you could have gave him was an explanation. :tongue:

Reply 15

LavenderBlueSky88

Original post by Scott.M

Tbf if he was oblivious and it came out of the blue, it is rather cold and heartless to not agree to meet up - the least you could have gave him was an explanation. :tongue:

Haha it wasn't out of the blue.. He was just a bit...
Naive? We were basically just friends for over 3 months, not exactly a healthy relationship. I did agree to meet up with him on more than one occasion :smile:

Reply 16

LavenderBlueSky88

Original post by Gouki

You also realise they cared as little about you as you do about the person you dumped

Not strictly true as I did care about my ex, we had just become more like best friends than boyfriend and girlfriend. But i did realise how pathetic my constant plans to get back with this order ex had been!