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Feel bad for not doing medicine anymore (I dropped out of medicine)

Hi

I used to study medicine. However after the first year, I dropped out and started a different course.

I was miserable there, my life was really bad. I hated the course, I didn't enjoy learning about diseases, I found it dull and boring. I didn't like the hospital placements, I found it depressing to be in hospitals and was not interested in the work. The atmosphere was horrible for me, a lot of it felt like not actually "curing people", more focusing on the quality of life, getting them better to just go home. I felt horrible.

I don't think I could have battled it out there for five years, I was depressed and anxious beyond belief and not enjoying life.

I made the decision to drop out of medicine. And since then, I've improved a lot personally, made new friends, I'm definitely enjoying life more than before. A lot of the things after my time in medicine has made me a stronger, happier person.


The problem is I can't get medicine out of my head. Although I'm not interested in it, nor wish a repeat of my experience, I have feelings of regret. I'm ok with my current course, but I'm not fascinated by it. More interest than Medicine by a country mile, but I'm not really the academic type, I do well but I don't enjoy studying. But the prestige of being a doctor is a hard thing for me to let go. For some reason I care about it. And it's not just the case of finding another "prestigious" career, for some reason in my head, a doctor is the only career I find prestigious. I don't know why, I know that their are plenty of prestigious careers out there, and prestige itself shouldn't be important, you should do what you love. But deep down it bothers me, I wish it didn't.

I applied for medicine in the first place to help people. I love doing charity work, and still do. Nothing else actually interested me in medicine. I've been telling myself I can both do a career as well as help out with charity. Best of both worlds, at least when I'm helping out I'm actually enjoying myself. But it doesn't work, I can't get it out of my head. I don't even care about the money, my new career after I get out of medicine ultimately could pay even more and besides that my family is very wealthy and I really don't have much interest becoming rich. All I seem to care about is the reputation and what others will think of me. Even seeing my friends who are studying medicine on facebook saddens me a bit, seeing how they are doing medicine and sticking with it/enjoying it, but I'm not.


Thoughts/Advice? Would be much appreciated.
If your heart wasn't in it, there isn't much more you can do. The most important thing is your happiness and passion for the career route you're going down, and medicine, especially, is something you have to passionate about. Try and stop comparing your life to others (maybe stop looking at Facebook as people only put things on there that they want people to see). As you've said, you only really care about the prestige and other peoples opinions, which is a problem in it's self. No offence, but I'm unsure whether you would have succeeded in Medicine if that was the case. I hope you realize that if Medicine was making you that upset and miserable, you did the right thing by leaving. You would have ended up a mess if you carried on with something like that for 5 years.
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KrazyKoala
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Original post by perfectmix
If your heart wasn't in it, there isn't much more you can do. The most important thing is your happiness and passion for the career route you're going down, and medicine, especially, is something you have to passionate about. Try and stop comparing your life to others (maybe stop looking at Facebook as people only put things on there that they want people to see). As you've said, you only really care about the prestige and other peoples opinions, which is a problem in it's self. No offence, but I'm unsure whether you would have succeeded in Medicine if that was the case. I hope you realize that if Medicine was making you that upset and miserable, you did the right thing by leaving. You would have ended up a mess if you carried on with something like that for 5 years.


Thanks for replying. I do feel that I would have made a mess had I continued for five years, but it's still feel a bit bothered by it.
Original post by KrazyKoala
Thanks for replying. I do feel that I would have made a mess had I continued for five years, but it's still feel a bit bothered by it.


There is nothing else you can do, a career and your happiness isn't about prestige or what people think. :smile:

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