The Student Room Group

Cut contact with my best friend but I miss her

Hey guys,

So basically me and this girl from uni were close friends for 3 years and would spend most of our time together. We were put in the same halls, instantly had a connection and got to know each other really well. I realized late on that I had feelings for her and tried progressing things to a relationship level but she rejected me. This was really hard for me as being turned down by someone who means a lot to you is worse than just a random girl who you've known 5 minutes.

So after that I really tried to make the friendship work but went through contant feelings of jealousy and angst. It became painful for me to hear her bring guys back to our house, especially after those relationships would fail and she'd go back to me for support. In the end I couldn't cope any more and told her that I had to cut contact in order to move on. I'd developed feelings of resentment towards her and it felt as though our friendship just wasn't genuine anymore, no matter how much I tried to ignore how I felt.

It has now been 4 months of no contact and although I've moved on in some ways, I still miss her a lot. The problem is that I know if we go back to being friends, I'll still want more than that, as much as I miss her company and being around her. My head tells me cutting contact was the right decision but I can't help but wonder if I'll ever meet someone like her again. Any advice?
Reply 1
Similar situation here right now. You just have to keep going on and entertain yourself in other ways as such.

If you go back you'll only find pain and suffering. It isn't worth it. :no:
Original post by 8472
Similar situation here right now. You just have to keep going on and entertain yourself in other ways as such.

If you go back you'll only find pain and suffering. It isn't worth it. :no:


Yeah you're probably right. The temptation is always there for me but by going no contact, I am less bothered by what she's up to and don't get frustrated by how things panned out. I did get a message from her the other day where she told me a bit about some changes in her life like parents getting divorced which is unfortunate, but doesn't really change our situation. I still care about her. What happened in your case?
Reply 3
Original post by frozen_fire
Yeah you're probably right. The temptation is always there for me but by going no contact, I am less bothered by what she's up to and don't get frustrated by how things panned out. I did get a message from her the other day where she told me a bit about some changes in her life like parents getting divorced which is unfortunate, but doesn't really change our situation. I still care about her. What happened in your case?

I'll PM you. :yep:
Okay this is really killing me right now. I cannot stop thinking about her atm and how I feel like I've lost my soulmate. I know they say there are billions of people out there but what if she was the 'one'? I'm just not interested in anyone else and it's been this way for 3 years. Now we've gone no contact and this just hasn't changed. Giving up on life :/

Quick Reply

Latest