The Student Room Group

How to know a relationship is official?

I remember the time where the boy would ask "Do you wanna be my girlfriend?" Or pass a note for a yes/no tick with the question. These days, more and more people seem to be carrying it on without being official, I see.

Does the girl, wondering where they stand after a few fantastic dates, (like me at the moment, lol) ask "Are we official" or "Is this mutually exclusive" or "Are we bf and gf?"

Or is there a moment e.g (hug, kiss, stare, sex, cumshot, retweet, stroke, laugh) that they both know they're official?

What are your experiences with this issue, and how do you think it should be in the future? What makes two people who are dating official these days?

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''so what are we?''
A relationship is only official when it's consummated.
Reply 3
When you set your relationship on Facebook and say who. :yep:
Reply 4
Original post by barneystin
''so what are we?''


Is that a dreaded question though? Or does it make it seem as if the girl is coming on too strongly?
Reply 5
Original post by Jackoclypse
A relationship is only official when it's consummated.


Consummated as in they've had sex?
Reply 6
Original post by 8472
When you set your relationship on Facebook and say who. :yep:


Hahaha. I shall keep that in mind :smile:
Original post by Martina_
Consummated as in they've had sex?


Yes, immediately after marriage is the best time though.
Reply 8
Another one. If you do relationship things in public. Like walking along holding hands.
Original post by Martina_
Is that a dreaded question though? Or does it make it seem as if the girl is coming on too strongly?


it is a dreaded question because people dont ask anymore. it just happens, there comes a time where its obvious you're exclusive.

despite all these social networks and different ways to communicate, society has forgotten how to communicate. ironic.
My recent ex asked me if I would be his girlfriend which was weird yet cute but the one before him I had no idea what we were but felt like like it was too soon to ask the ''so what are we question'' I think it depends on the person I think.

While we're on the topic I need to say I hate going on dates, I miss when someone asked you out and you said yes and you learnt about each other properly by spending quality time with each other and not through some date where someone can act like they're someone or something that they're not. rant over.
Usually something along the lines of "so are we together then?" or "do you want to be my girlfriend?"
Original post by Martina_
I remember the time where the boy would ask "Do you wanna be my girlfriend?" Or pass a note for a yes/no tick with the question. These days, more and more people seem to be carrying it on without being official, I see.

Does the girl, wondering where they stand after a few fantastic dates, (like me at the moment, lol) ask "Are we official" or "Is this mutually exclusive" or "Are we bf and gf?"

Or is there a moment e.g (hug, kiss, stare, sex, cumshot, retweet, stroke, laugh) that they both know they're official?

What are your experiences with this issue, and how do you think it should be in the future? What makes two people who are dating official these days?
hmm id say ask yourself when you feel like yeh wana commit

let me tell yeh a wee story though.
I was "with" a girl for a while...due to one particular reason I never really saw us as serious.we actively encouraged each other to find someone more suitable but to no avail.
anyways one busy week..we didnt talk and it was then I realised how happy I was with her around...my dad told me that whatever age yeh find the right girl yeh bloody make sure you hold onto her..and so I had finally developed real feelings for her.

She texted me the next day saying she met someone.I had to let her go.You gotta make sure you ask the girl out when you start developing the big feels:smile: or yeh may just regret it...
Timeline of relationship with boyfriend:
Met each other at some point in early 2012, became friends.
Started talking more over the winter, became closer friends.
Lots of drama, became best friends.
Went to Rome on holiday after exams, got drunk and slept together. FWB.
Remained FWB for two months, during which time feelings developed.
Told him that I had feelings for him and then he told me that he loved me - relationship :smile:
Then made it FB official about a month after haha.
Original post by 8472
When you set your relationship on Facebook and say who. :yep:


This.

Less embarrassment than asking in person

Posted from TSR Mobile
Just go with the flow, you don't need to say anything you'll probably just know soon enough :smile:
Original post by trustmeimlying1
hmm id say ask yourself when you feel like yeh wana commit

let me tell yeh a wee story though.
I was "with" a girl for a while...due to one particular reason I never really saw us as serious.we actively encouraged each other to find someone more suitable but to no avail.
anyways one busy week..we didnt talk and it was then I realised how happy I was with her around...my dad told me that whatever age yeh find the right girl yeh bloody make sure you hold onto her..and so I had finally developed real feelings for her.

She texted me the next day saying she met someone.I had to let her go.You gotta make sure you ask the girl out when you start developing the big feels:smile: or yeh may just regret it...


That's really sad. :frown:
Original post by Allaboutthatbass
Just go with the flow, you don't need to say anything you'll probably just know soon enough :smile:


Original post by karmacrunch
That's really sad. :frown:
yeh ce sera sera though
whats for yeh wont go past yeh right
anyhow how are yeh urself:?
Reply 18
Original post by kayleighisonfire
My recent ex asked me if I would be his girlfriend which was weird yet cute but the one before him I had no idea what we were but felt like like it was too soon to ask the ''so what are we question'' I think it depends on the person I think.

While we're on the topic I need to say I hate going on dates, I miss when someone asked you out and you said yes and you learnt about each other properly by spending quality time with each other and not through some date where someone can act like they're someone or something that they're not. rant over.


Exactly! I totally agree with your rant. I wanna go back to the time where we just knew. It's no fun wondering lol
Reply 19
Original post by LavenderBlueSky88
Usually something along the lines of "so are we together then?" or "do you want to be my girlfriend?"



I'll muster the courage to try the former, thanks :smile:

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