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Tell me how to make her mine

I'm such an introverted person, can't talk about relationships or anything like that with anyone (maybe because I'm 21 and never had a girlfriend and find that embarrassing)

Recently, I've started to speak to and meet up with a friend from a few years ago. I really like her, but am struggling to let her know this - what can I do to make her aware, without making things terribly awkward and what do I do after that?

Sorry - I'm really bad at these things

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Step 1: don't shoot up your university when you get rejected it is a dick move.
Step 2: accept the girl you like is out of your league and move on.
Step 3: go on a motocross course this will make you more extroverted.
Step 4: date a homeless person who relies on you for food.
Original post by Jackoclypse
Step 1: don't shoot up your university when you get rejected it is a dick move.
Step 2: accept the girl you like is out of your league and move on.
Step 3: go on a motocross course this will make you more extroverted.
Step 4: date a homeless person who relies on you for food.




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This is the kind of advice that's likely to cause an emotionally unstable virgin to shoot up a school.
Reply 3
Any real advice?
Aww, c'mon serious answers for the poor guy! The best advice I can give you is, pretend like it's a dream and nothing can go wrong :biggrin:
The worse thing she can say is no, and it won't come to that! Girls love it when someone can make them laugh, they love surprises too! :smile:
Flirt. Get her number. More flirting. Talk about sexual stuff during text as it's less cringing than real life.

Ask her out on a date casually, then if that goes well, ask her out on a real date and make sure she knows it's a date.

However gathering from your age, experience and the girl, I don't think she's interested. You have a small window to act on, don't delay.

Keep us posted
To make her yours you have to piss on her the same way dogs do. And make sure you do it in public so that everyone knows you own her.



Spoiler

Well, does she show signs that she likes you, eye you up, etc? Does she have a boyfriend already? Not necessarily a deal breaker if she does as she may not like him/want to ditch him. Of course there is always the possibility that she may feel the same about you and also feels apprensive about saying anything. To be honest though too many girls still want the guy to do all the chatting up/asking out which is sheer laziness on their part. I would play it cautious and ask her out for a drink somewhere as a friend would, or to help you with something perhaps.
Reply 8
Original post by Stewie2011
Well, does she show signs that she likes you, eye you up, etc? Does she have a boyfriend already? Not necessarily a deal breaker if she does as she may not like him/want to ditch him. Of course there is always the possibility that she may feel the same about you and also feels apprensive about saying anything. To be honest though too many girls still want the guy to do all the chatting up/asking out which is sheer laziness on their part. I would play it cautious and ask her out for a drink somewhere as a friend would, or to help you with something perhaps.


No boyfriend, in fact neither of us have been in relationships so I don't even know her stance on that
Reply 9
Original post by kingzebra
Aww, c'mon serious answers for the poor guy! The best advice I can give you is, pretend like it's a dream and nothing can go wrong :biggrin:
The worse thing she can say is no, and it won't come to that! Girls love it when someone can make them laugh, they love surprises too! :smile:


Thanks! When we meet, when should I tell her/how should I word it? :smile::redface:
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks! When we meet, when should I tell her/how should I word it? :smile::redface:


"Hello m'lady" *at this point tip your fedora* "may I escort you to the movies?" .. "No? ... ok bye"




I joke of course mate good luck to you! (leave the uzi at home though)
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks! When we meet, when should I tell her/how should I word it? :smile::redface:


Well if suggest getting her a coffee! And if you drive pick her up, if not, when you meet her, have a single red Rose! Not a whole bunch, too soon, too easy, a single one is more delicate! Make her laugh, tell her silly stories, make jokes but don't talk too much about yourself, ask her about her without being too in her face and nosey. At the end tell her you had a great time and you'd love to do it again. The most important thing is to keep smiling the whole time, there's saying something and showing it! Good luck OP! :biggrin: xoxo
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous
Any real advice?


Unless she is secretly harbouring the same intent, then it's just not gonna happen.

Chances are, she knows how you feel already and is dreading you asking because she'd rather not friendzone you.

It's going to go down like this:

"Hey Emily/Kate/Lottie, I'm kind of really interested in you in a romantic way" (or words to that effect)
"Oh dear. I'm so sorry. That's so sweet, but I just don't see you that way. We're already such good friends and I would be devastated to risk our friendship on a relationship like that.
[super awkward silence]
"So sorry - gotta go."

And you're going to be so depressed that it is literally going to take two hours of Brazzers just to take the edge off the pain.

You might even be a glutton for punishment and go back for more - either try and pretend it never happened, and be her mate, or you might try again on the odd chance she's miraculously changed her mind.


On the other hand, if she is like minded, then it's going to be easy as long as you don't scare her off by being a weirdo.

Make some physical contact next time you see her. Ask straight up where she wants to go with the whole thing. She'll either give you speech #1, or get a bit embarrassed and eventually agree to go out with you.

Whatever you do, don't pull any silly stunts or it'll haunt you forever.
It's why I suggest the ask out for drink approach, doesn't have to be alcohol/bar at night, daytime's fine. If she's not interested then less embarrassing if she turns you down. If she is interested then a bit of alchohol may loosen her up a bit and yourself and you can perhaps tell her you like her from there. Would avoid the red roses unless you want to throw caution to the wind it can add pressure to the situation for both sides I think. Also, if you drink s bit of alcohol (not really a lot though) you've got an excuse if she's not interested (hey I'lld been drinking :smile: )
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Stewie2011
It's why I suggest the ask out for drink approach, doesn't have to be alcohol/bar at night, daytime's fine. If she's not interested then less embarrassing if she turns you down. If she is interested then a bit of alchohol may loosen her up a bit and yourself and you can perhaps tell her you like her from there. Would avoid the red roses unless you want to throw caution to the wind it can add pressure to the situation for both sides I think. Also, if you drink s bit of alcohol (not really a lot though) you've got an excuse if she's not interested (hey I'lld been drinking :smile: )


This is not a bad idea, I'll give it a shot.

So if I tell her and she has a positive reaction, what happens next?
Original post by Anonymous
Any real advice?


You problem is confidence. You need to flirt, it doesn't need to be textbook perfect, if anything a bit of shyness is sorta cute but only to an extent.

Basically find a way to work on your confidence with her and women/people in general.

Try and escalate next meet up, try a tentative bit of physical contact (touching her hand briefly, touching her arm) and based on ehr response (good, negative) escalate a little further or what have you.

Best of luck broham.
Original post by Anonymous
This is not a bad idea, I'll give it a shot.

So if I tell her and she has a positive reaction, what happens next?


Personally would go with whatever seems most natural, perhaps an arm round her a little, possibly followed up with moving in for a kiss. If this doesn't seem to gel with the moment, i.e if she looks a little stiff or not open to this then possibly put your hand ontop or with hers. If you get the vibe she wouldn't react with ease to any sort of physical contact then don't do any and perhaps agree to meet up again. Then on follow up meets when she gets more familiar with you she could become more open to physical togetherness.
Original post by Jackoclypse
Step 1: don't shoot up your university when you get rejected it is a dick move.
Step 2: accept the girl you like is out of your league and move on.
Step 3: go on a motocross course this will make you more extroverted.
Step 4: date a homeless person who relies on you for food.
This sounds like it would make a good novel or film :lol:
Give her father 2 goats and a camel.
Original post by Stewie2011
Personally would go with whatever seems most natural, perhaps an arm round her a little, possibly followed up with moving in for a kiss. If this doesn't seem to gel with the moment, i.e if she looks a little stiff or not open to this then possibly put your hand ontop or with hers. If you get the vibe she wouldn't react with ease to any sort of physical contact then don't do any and perhaps agree to meet up again. Then on follow up meets when she gets more familiar with you she could become more open to physical togetherness.


Please don't do any of this, and especially not the kissing part. If she isn't interested it will kill your friendship forever. Just start with going out for drinks and see how things go. Save kissing and putting your arm around her for when you are a little more confident about whether your feelings are reciprocated.

Just go out and have fun and get her thinking that she enjoys your company for starters.
(edited 9 years ago)

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