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In year 13 with no friends

Hi, I'm almost 18 and feel so upset and alone :frown:

This sounds so pathetic and stupid but i'm about to start year 13 and I literally have no friends. I've had a pretty bad life all the way through school. I got picked on because I was so quiet and shy (I still am). I had friends but they have recently ditched me and turned really nasty.

I have no one in sixth form to talk to at all. I feel that no one likes me and no one wants to be my friend. I hate it!! I was alone for most of year 12. My friends were fine with me some days and horrible the next. Now they have ditched me for good. I don't know what to do, I just want someone to talk to, a friend similar to me. I can't talk to anyone, especially not the girls who ditched me, they hate me and will never be my friend again. I think it's because i'm quiet and I don't drink alcohol and they do. I don't think they wanted me to be apart of their 'group'.

Just hope someone will see this and help me or give out some advice. I would someone my age to reply who is possibly in the same or similar position.

Thanks so much for reading, sorry it's so long! :smile:

Reply 1

HeisenbergWW

Sorry to hear this :frown:

My advice would be to take up some extra curricular activities you are interested in, this will be a simple and fun way to meet people with similar interests to you :smile:

good luck! x

Reply 2

Reeeeyah

I'm sorry to hear this too!

Do you talk to people or try to spark up conversations? or try to build friendships with other people apart from these group of friends who ditched you?. I think sometimes when you are shy you kind of expect everyone else to make the effort with you and you end up making 0 effort and in turn no one makes an effort with you.

Do you have social media like Facebook where you could add some people from your school and maybe start up some conversations that way aswell?

Try talking to new people, find a common ground/interests or take up some extra curricular activities like the above poster said.

But honestly try not to let it get to you. I'm sure you're a very nice person, you just need to work on your shyness and try to get out of your comfort zone.

Reply 3

mrgordo

oh wow hey, I was in exactly the same situation, pretty much.

when I was in year 12, I went to a different college to most of my friends except one, so I just stuck with her all year. I am quiet and shy too and didn't bond with anyone. She dropped out after year 12 and I was literally left with no friends in year 13 - there were people I could do a tiny bit of small talk with, but I'm terrible at that. There just didnt' seem to be anyone there who was my kind of person or who wanted to be friends with me.

The advice everyone always gives you is 'be confident!' and 'go out and make friends!' but that is so, so difficult when it is not who you are. People don't understand that it can be so difficult for naturally shy people to be outgoing. I am leaving for uni this year and will try to build a little more confidence with making friends because I don't want to be in the same situation, but in year 13, I decided to get on with the year and survive it by: working.

I spent all of my free periods in silent study areas working, or at least watching TV shows on my phone when I had done enough revision. This is actually SUCH A HUGE PLUS at college, to have no friends: it means you get results.

I did better than a lot of people who are just as clever as me, but had friends. Although it's horrible sometimes, and you feel lonely and bored and frustrated (there was a LOT of this), when it's done you'll feel proud. Work is the distraction from loneliness. Then you pass and can go on to uni, refreshed with your new self, not stuck with the same old people. I also found that when I was less worried about making friends, it would come more naturally: I chatted to a few people in some of my classes. I never got friendships outside of class, but sometimes it's just nice anyway. There was a place I could go at break, and stand around awkwardly with people I vaguely knew, but working was the solution.

If it's not for you, then extra-curricular activities can also be a great way, like mentioned above. But for me, studying was the solution! I just got determined to not waste the time that I was forced to spend alone. :smile:

Good luck xx