Have any of you ''ended'' your relationship with your parent(s)?

You know the saying 'You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family'? Well, just as friendships can end up not working out, has the same happened to you and parent(s)? And I mean a serious termination of your relationship rather than a falling out which lasts a few days.

What made you decide you no longer wanted anything to do with them?
What did you do?
How do you feel?

I'm expecting this to be a rare occurrence, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

Any contributions will be appreciated. Thank you

You know the saying 'You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family'? Well, just as friendships can end up not working out, has the same happened to you and parent(s)? And I mean a serious termination of your relationship rather than a falling out which lasts a few days.

What made you decide you no longer wanted anything to do with them?
What did you do?
How do you feel?

I'm expecting this to be a rare occurrence, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

Any contributions will be appreciated. Thank you

Do you have a story to tell too?

As for me :-

What made you decide you no longer wanted anything to do with them?

There wasn't really one single factor to it but a culmination of years of little things here and there as well as several years where there just was an unspoken cold war.

From young days, the mother preferred the elder brother who was her absolute favourite and the years he was bullying me she simply refused to acknowledge it happened. Everything he wanted she gave it to him. The one commodity that was a scarcity was time to which she had none for me but plenty for him.

Then there was the father who had the younger sister as his absolute darling. Everything she wanted she received from him.

Rewards for doing well in academics and sports that made the elder brother feel slighted? Well they used their financial resources to send me away at age 12, not to a different home or school but to a completely different country.

The day I took that flight to England at 12 was the last time I saw them in person till I was 24. That was essentially the first cold war. Spoke to them 3 times on the telephone during that era. Once to tell them I had arrived at Winchester, once to tell them I had been accepted into Oxford and once to tell them I was graduating. They didn't attend my graduation as holidaying in Paris was more important.

The favouritism didn't stop, both of the siblings received huge amounts of money from the parents. Home, cars, "jobs" and educational plans for their children. Cars are a big deal as this is Singapore we are talking off and a small car tiny ****box car can cost as much as a Mercedes in UK. The brother gets a "hand me down" from the mother every other year and she doesn't go for cheap cars, recently she gave him her former BMW 5 series that was only 9 months old. The sister, she has had at least 5 cars from the father in the last 10 year with the last one being a Mercedes SLK. What did I receive? I received a small discount off a condo when I moved back to Singapore.

Then came the first dispute 5 years ago. My granddad passed on, I was the one closest to him and we did a lot of investing and plantations together, he left his share of those investments to me which was a big amount and he also left several of my late grandma's jewellery to me. Father wanted me to give the jewellery to the sister claiming she didn't receive much from him. I told him she and him both can **** off. It didn't go well. Cold war started for a year plus.

Then 3 months ago. My other granddad left everyone with money, he gave them a choice of either one lump sump, in several stages or a monthly allowance. The brother took the one lump sump and lived like a duke. The sister took hers in several stages. Mother started asking that I divert the amount I get from the trust to the brother's children. First she said they had more rights to that money as his wife is Chinese and his kids are more Chinese than mine since my kids have a Swedish mother and that my late grandfather would never have approved or given me that money had he known. I told her I rather give the money to the Norwegian Tax Office than to give it to her favourite brat and that if she wanted to support them for life she should use her own money rather than touch mine.

Then the final straw. 2 weeks after that incident, the father asked me to sign a waiver for a property his father gave him. He has it on a right to life and after he passes on he is supposed to pass it to me as that was his father's instructions. He found out that 4 of his brothers had made deals with me as each of them held a house that they had a right to life to and after that was to pass on 50% of it to me and the rest to their children. I made deals with them that I'd waive my share to it for 1% of the value subject to several clauses. Father wanted me to give him a waiver for the grandfather's old house as he wanted to give that house to the sister and brother, claiming that I already had plenty. I told him he can buy that waiver for market value and then he can do the hell he likes. In the end he sent me the money for that waiver together with all kinds of bad mouthing.

After that both parents started spreading **** about me and bad mouthed me to my kids and relatives.

What did you do?

I don't really have to do much, they live in Singapore. I live in Norway. I've simply stopped taking their calls or answering any of their messages.

Their birthday was last week. In the past I've always sent something for their birthdays. This time I sent nothing. I also stopped talking to the siblings.

I told my kids not to be in contact with them and if they needed a grandparent to talk to they shall speak to their mother's mother.

How do you feel?

In the beginning there was always a sense of guilt to it that I was doing something wrong. There was also the sense that I was placing money over relationships. Then end of the day I realized it is my money and if I don't defend it then I'm just opening the door for more.

Now it is just another day. Unfortunately I can't change my phone number as I have plenty of business contacts on it too.

You know the saying 'You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family'? Well, just as friendships can end up not working out, has the same happened to you and parent(s)? And I mean a serious termination of your relationship rather than a falling out which lasts a few days.

What made you decide you no longer wanted anything to do with them?
What did you do?
How do you feel?

I'm expecting this to be a rare occurrence, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

Any contributions will be appreciated. Thank you

I'm going to break the mould and tell my story. I've pretty much cut contact with my family but it's 99% my fault. I've never really got along with them, I've always had issues with getting along with people but my family especially. Every little thing they do I pretty much explode at, whether small or big. Eventually, I just decided I didn't want it anymore. There are some things which caused fractured foundations, but I won't bore you with that.

As to how I felt, I didn't feel anything. That's what was most poignant to me, I just felt nothing. Like when you throw away an empty bag of crisps.