Preferential treatment towards non-Muslim/non-hijabi?

The reason they don't talk soo much is because they cannot see your face. The face is used to communicate interest and emotion in a conversation. The Cafe Assistants may not be able to tell if you want to talk or be left alone quietly because in western culture and other cultures facial body language is key to judging things like this. They think it is best to not talk too much in case you don't really want to talk. In a Muslim country where everyone (well women of course) is covered up people don't use facial body language as much as you cannot see their faces. In a western country unfortunately you are going to struggle. They are not necessarily being racist they just don't know how to respond to someone covered up as it is outside of their normal interactions in most cases.

I wear a hijab which means that I only cover my hair but not my face.. Niqab is the one used as hair and face covering. When I was at the cafe, I clearly smiled at everyone I see and even said Hi, but apparently not everyone returned my greeting with the same hospitality like my friends received.. the same goes to the guy at the popcorn counter...
But I definitely agree with your points! It's just that I wish those employees would be alot more open minded and be friendly regardless of how their customers look like, given that it is a part of the policy to give a deserving, unbiased treatment to every one of their customers.

I don't really see why you are complaining; you say yourself that the hijab is there to ward off unwanted attention from guys. I'm sure if the staff had been flirting with you, they wouldn't have got a good response and they know this - if they had started flirting with you, chatting you up, truthfully what would your response have been?
People know this, people don't want a cold reception.
You said they were all polite, "cordial", what more do you want?

So, if I'm understanding this correctly, you wear a hijab so guys don't come onto you and are now complaining because guys aren't coming onto you?

So, if I'm understanding this correctly, you wear a hijab so guys don't come onto you and are now complaining because guys aren't coming onto you?

Never said I wanted their chatting me up or flirtiness whatsoever but I just hope they are a bit friendlier as an employee to their customer and not a cold response. There's always a fine line between being flirty and friendly and I'm talking about the latter. And they were not the slightest bit polite which was why I complained about this in the first place. All I ask is a bit of a respect from them.

Like I said on my initial post, the differential treatment I got almost crossed into the unfair zone. Especially in the situation when I purchased the drinks and I got a cold, almost pissed-off response from the counter guy but when my friend chimed in, he immediately became a friendlier person which in my opinion was just plain rude and almost racist!

But you said that "It was nothing unusual, just some cordial greetings from one of the employees" not that it was a "cold response".
And then when you said you had a cold response, you said that the guy was chatting up your friend. Maybe those are the guys two alternatives, polite, doing his job, or having a bit of fun with a customer who seems up for it. Which would you rather?

Salaam and hey everyone..
So, I wanna share with you my experience last night when chilling out with my friends. I was at a cafe slash bookstore, trying to kill some time while waiting for them to come. It was nothing unusual, just some cordial greetings from one of the employees. And so when my friends finally came to where I was sitting (note that my friends are non-Muslims and they are Chinese, quite pretty and very much of a risque-dresser!), I can't help but noticed that almost every employees rushed to their service and greeted them with wide, beaming smiles. Oh well, for as long as I stayed there, I never did get the same welcoming gesture! But I shrugged it off, thinking that it wasn't that big of a deal anyway so I went on chatting with them.

After that. we decided to walk to a cinema, buy tickets and get some popcorns while waiting for the screening time. I got to a counter to purchase some drinks and all I got was a cold response! One of my friends came up to me, offering help with the drinks and the guy who served me no longer than minutes ago started chatting up my friend and just like one of the employees at the cafe, literally smiling so wide at her (who clearly was so attentive to her every word and enjoyed having her attention!). I stood awkwardly by her side, waiting for them to finish talking. He then offered her complimentary snacks and smoothies (which my other friends and I ended up eating on whatever free stuff that she got since she's lactose-intolerant). At this point, I was so hurt and offended throughout the whole day, I started to reserve myself and keep quiet.

As a hijabi, I understand that wearing a hijab or covering yourself fully is meant to ward off unwanted attentions but judging from what happened, the whole situation was almost on the borderline offensive and crosses into the unfair zone.. I don't want people to view my hijab as an instant barrier in term of communication and socialising. I want them to still view me as an individual. I know one of my hijabi friends experiencing the same thing too when working with her attractive counterpart. Most of the questions from the employers were addressed to her and my friend's opinions certainly don't matter to them. Again, I do not command anyone's special attention whatsoever but their respect for me as a person, customer.

Questions to everyone; Muslims and non-Muslims:
Do you ever give someone (especially hijab-wearing Muslims or Muslims in particular) the same biased treatment? Do you ever get embarrassed being seen with Muslim friends or hijabis especially (since I know most people like being associated with cool looking friends)? And please, I do not want responses along the lines of, 'Then, you better take off your hijab', 'This is not an Islamic country so why do you still wear that?' etc. Everyone's entitled to their own opinions but I'm expecting a more substantial one. Please respect my decision of wearing it as this is my identity as a Muslim.

You mark yourself out as different in British society by wearing a hijab (which you have every right to do).
Are you really then suprised that people treat you differently? I myself would be more reserved around a hijabi, as I just feel uncomfortable showing them attention/affection, as I feel they dont wan't that if they are wearing a hijab.

You said yourself, they were not rude or disrespectful, so it would be wrong to label them as racist and harsh to call them "islamaphobic".

Um, what's the message you're trying to convey? You want people, men, to talk to you? It depends where you live as well. If you live in a racist ish area, where people aren't familiar with ,Muslim women and their covering, then they won't really want to talk to you. I grew up in area where random people talk to me almost whenever I go out, or smile. But that's because it's multi cultural, and I'm so worth talking to

You said your friend is pretty, wears little clothing and gets given free stuff. It is not normal behaviour to give customers free stuff, you weren't being discriminated against the guy just found your friend attractive.

Oh right, my sentences may had been incoherent now that I read it back but it was probably because I was so offended that I decided to type it in a rush without making any sense of it, sorry. Though the employees at the cafe weren't as impolite as the popcorn guy but it was the latter that sent me into a depressed state throughout the whole day....

I never said they were Islamophobic nor disrespectful, it was just unfair. In this whole employee-customer relation thingy, all that I ask was that they could have been a bit more polite in serving me orders and ask if I need anything else. But it seemed as if they were reluctant to serve me any longer; like the kind of expression you see on someone when they could barely wait to end their shift (which was definitely not the case)? It was exactly THAT that I thought was rude..

Fair enough, but there was no need for you to feel like that.
If anything, it seems from what you've said like the guys at the cafe/ cinema were doing their utmost to respect you: in their eyes, you have put up a boundary between yourselves by wearing the hijab, and they are respecting that boundary by not being flirty, and not wanting to cause offence to you.
Aside from that, you said yourself that your friend is pretty and whatnot, there is no sense in comparing yourself to her when she gets attention from males.