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Girls would you be friends with someone like me? (guys welcome too)

I am not a particularly good looking guy. I don't pay that much attention to what I wear and I don't really style my hair or anything. I don't have any tattos and I'm the kind of guy who you will nearly never find in a pub and I don't really have fun there.

I do not have extremely good social skills and find it hard to make friends and get to know strangers even if they are guys. My childhood friends (well the closest friends) tended to be girls although there were guys too. I was not that popular among guys perhaps because I don't really play sports although I do exercise.

I am not gay or anything and have met nice guys as well its just that perhaps the gender "norms" of feminity might apply to me more. So I find more like minded people that are female and find that girls tend to be kinder and don't hide their thoughts as much as men. The stereotypical "macho guy"would not be a good character match for me.

I am nice and people who know me like me and I would do anything in my ability to help a friend and sometimes go too much out of my way even.

My problem now is that most of my friends who were female are people I knew since childhood. Since my late teens I notice that girls tend to have this barrier to befriending them and seem to be checking if a guy is trying to get into a relationship with them. If you are a girl do you do this (be honest).

The (often) male character that I lack is the "I'm a bro I don't care" attitude that society pushes on males. I genuinely care a lot about people and feel bad when people have problems. I don't like it when my friends are unhappy.

If you are a girl, would you like me as a friend from the description I gave? How would a guy like me approach you and what would they have to do to get to know you better and perhaps become friends. I am not very confident talking to people I barely know but I open up and become comfortable when I know the person? Is this a problem, girls really seem to like confident men a lot more.

I find it hard to make male friends too, however when I do find a male with a matching "nice" character its sometimes slightly easier as they don't seem to be checking if I just want to date them.
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Original post by Anonymous
I am not a particularly good looking guy. I don't pay that much attention to what I wear and I don't really style my hair or anything. I don't have any tattos and I'm the kind of guy who you will nearly never find in a pub and I don't really have fun there.

I do not have extremely good social skills and find it hard to make friends and get to know strangers even if they are guys. My childhood friends (well the closest friends) tended to be girls although there were guys too. I was not that popular among guys perhaps because I don't really play sports although I do exercise.

I am not gay or anything and have met nice guys as well its just that perhaps the gender "norms" of feminity might apply to me more. So I find more like minded people that are female and find that girls tend to be kinder and don't hide their thoughts as much as men. The stereotypical "macho guy"would not be a good character match for me.

I am nice and people who know me like me and I would do anything in my ability to help a friend and sometimes go too much out of my way even.

My problem now is that most of my friends who were female are people I knew since childhood. Since my late teens I notice that girls tend to have this barrier to befriending them and seem to be checking if a guy is trying to get into a relationship with them. If you are a girl do you do this (be honest).

The (often) male character that I lack is the "I'm a bro I don't care" attitude that society pushes on males. I genuinely care a lot about people and feel bad when people have problems. I don't like it when my friends are unhappy.

If you are a girl, would you like me as a friend from the description I gave? How would a guy like me approach you and what would they have to do to get to know you better and perhaps become friends. I am not very confident talking to people I barely know but I open up and become comfortable when I know the person? Is this a problem, girls really seem to like confident men a lot more.

I find it hard to make male friends too, however when I do find a male with a matching "nice" character its sometimes slightly easier as they don't seem to be checking if I just want to date them.



You seem to be a genuinely nice sweet guy :smile:.

I have guys in the friendzone that will remain in the friendzone, I am not one that likes to confuse a situation. Me and the guys have a mutual agreement that it is just friends not friends who may become something more.


lost my train of thought so will amend tomorrow XD.
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Original post by Anonymous
Since my late teens I notice that girls tend to have this barrier to befriending them and seem to be checking if a guy is trying to get into a relationship with them. If you are a girl do you do this (be honest).


In bold: nope. I flirt with pretty much everyone I meet for the first time, male or female, I assume everyone else does the same to some degree.

You seem like a nice guy, but if I'm meeting someone for the first time I would like them to be more confident. It's hard talking or joking with someone who doesn't say many words in his reply, and you're constantly checking to see whether or not this person is actually interested in being friendly with you or not.

As far as relationships go... no clue. Every girl is different. Sorry about that :smile:
Yeah sure, it is all about the personality! You sound nice and if I met you I would MAKE you talk and turn you into a confident guy. :h:
I'm a really chatty girl and I like talking to shy guys! They're quite mysterious to me as they are so quiet; I love making them open up! I talk to a variety of people so I wouldn't mind if they were shy or loud, everyone is different :smile:
(edited 9 years ago)

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