Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

This sounds pathetic..

Was my 21st yesterday and as usual since I was about 10 I did nothing for it because when I moved to middle school I got bullied.

I then switched after a year and got bullied less and then the same in upper school I felt I had to do stupid things to actually stand out, but that just got me kicked out when I was 15 and since I've been about 10 I've only had family wish me happy birthday which is just my dad, brother and sister the rest don't care..

sorry if I seem like I'm whinging but it's really gotten me down I'm 21 now and I've never had a normal teenage / young adult birthday yet alone life :frown:

And then you get the people who always say why are you so miserable.. Maybe it's because no matter what I do I can never have a bit of fun because no one other than a couple of family members want to acknowledge my existence.

i've been on anti depressants for 2 years now but how can I ever feel better when I've had next to no happy experiences in 11 years and people just say you have to love yourself before others will live you.. How can I when I have to be alone all the time.

Not having any friends, never having a gf or sex and barely any family that cares really crushes my soul.. I know there is always someone worse off but I can't help feeling like this.

I don't wanna kill myself, but there is no benefit in only existing.. Everyone wants to be happy and to be starved of happiness and affection for most of my life, it just makes it hard to see a point.. It's gone on this long why would it change now.

Sorry for the mega rant but I needed to vent.. Thanks for reading :redface:

Reply 1

IanDangerously

Go out and create some damn experiences for yourself then. That's what I did when I'd been depressed and lost time and friends, as soon as I could I just took off, traveled a bit, got back into doing things I used to love doing before, and made new friends. :smile: