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He took my virginty and wants nothing to do with me

Hi TSR

I had been talking to this lad for 6 months and i finally felt i was ready to have sex the first time was great but the second time not so much. Days later I ask if he wants to meet and he tells me he is seeing someone else . I don't understand I am a nice girl with a good job and have been told i am beautiful but its just not enough i don't get how he is seeing someone else days after we had sex. I know the best thing is to cut him off i just don't get how he has found someone else when we have been talking for months and he can cut me out when it was him doing all the messaging.

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It really depends if you were making it clear that you wanted a relationship. If you weren't it's highly likely he was just wanting sex.

On the other hand, if you were both clear that there were genuine feelings involved then he was just a dick. Good riddens, and you should feel the same way about him. Pity the poor person he's turned to.
Reply 2
Original post by Genocidal
It really depends if you were making it clear that you wanted a relationship. If you weren't it's highly likely he was just wanting sex.

On the other hand, if you were both clear that there were genuine feelings involved then he was just a dick. Good riddens, and you should feel the same way about him. Pity the poor person he's turned to.


I just can't believe he is seeing someone less than half a week after we last had sex , he does not even want that anymore i just don't get it.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 3
He wanted to shag you and that was it..
Original post by Anonymous
Original post by Genocidal
It really depends if you were making it clear that you wanted a relationship. If you weren't it's highly likely he was just wanting sex.

On the other hand, if you were both clear that there were genuine feelings involved then he was just a dick. Good riddens, and you should feel the same way about him. Pity the poor person he's turned to.


I just can't believe he is seeing someone less than half a week after we last had sex , he does not even want that anymore i just don't get it.


Then that means that he only wanted you for sex, and from the looks of it you didn't satisfy him enough to warrant him continuing having it with you. Either that, or he found someone he actual cares about.

It's tough, but it's a lesson learned. Don't have sex with someone who you have feelings for and doesn't feel the same about you.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Hi TSR

I had been talking to this lad for 6 months and i finally felt i was ready to have sex the first time was great but the second time not so much. Days later I ask if he wants to meet and he tells me he is seeing someone else . I don't understand I am a nice girl with a good job and have been told i am beautiful but its just not enough i don't get how he is seeing someone else days after we had sex. I know the best thing is to cut him off i just don't get how he has found someone else when we have been talking for months and he can cut me out when it was him doing all the messaging.
To be honest it kind of sounds like he just wanted to take your virginity.
Reply 6
Original post by 'Ello Dave!
Then that means that he only wanted you for sex, and from the looks of it you didn't satisfy him enough to warrant him continuing having it with you. Either that, or he found someone he actual cares about.

It's tough, but it's a lesson learned. Don't have sex with someone who you have feelings for and doesn't feel the same about you.


I was virgin he can't expect much not every time you will have sex will be great .
Ugh I have been here. Just pick yourself up and move on, he's not worth it x


Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by 'Ello Dave!
Then that means that he only wanted you for sex, and from the looks of it you didn't satisfy him enough to warrant him continuing having it with you. Either that, or he found someone he actual cares about.

It's tough, but it's a lesson learned. Don't have sex with someone who you have feelings for and doesn't feel the same about you.


The only reason she had sex with him is because she felt comfortable enough and assumed he liked her ? He obviously manipulated her and there is no way anyone would have known.

I'm so sorry op , lets hope he gets gonorrhea or something and his dick falls off.
Reply 9
Original post by ParadiseFound
The only reason she had sex with him is because she felt comfortable enough and assumed he liked her ? He obviously manipulated her and there is no way anyone would have known.

I'm so sorry op , lets hope he gets gonorrhea or something and his dick falls off.


Thanks ! Its a reflection on him not me he will regret this.
Welcome to life
Been there....honestly it sucks to hell.

The next day, my guy texted me and said there was a girl he liked for a while, and asked her out and she said yes, so we can't speak anymore. Then blocked me from every means of contact. It was absolutely horrible. But I was over it after a week of horrible crying etc. because I changed my mentality and thought I can't be giving someone so much emotion and time when they don't care. The way that I get over people is to get back in the game. It's been about 4 years since that night and since we spoke. He changed my mentality with sex, I was a girl who waited to get to fully know that person before going all the way, but then now, as I figured they can dump you just as easily on day 1 as they can during month 10 - so now I don't bother waiting anymore. Which is actually quite sad because I know that's not me.

It hurts every time I think of it as well.
Reply 12
Better off without him. You dodged a bullet :smile:
Reply 13
Welcome to the real world.


Posted from TSR Mobile
You can do better than him. Dry your eyes mate. :smile:
Original post by ParadiseFound
The only reason she had sex with him is because she felt comfortable enough and assumed he liked her ? He obviously manipulated her and there is no way anyone would have known.

I'm so sorry op , lets hope he gets gonorrhea or something and his dick falls off.


There's the problem. I agree the guy's still a douche, but if they're not exclusive then he's free to go and sleep with someone else.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 16
Original post by ParadiseFound
The only reason she had sex with him is because she felt comfortable enough and assumed he liked her ? He obviously manipulated her and there is no way anyone would have known.

I'm so sorry op , lets hope he gets gonorrhea or something and his dick falls off.


Where is the evidence of manipulation ? Unless you are assuming he deliberately lied to this girl simply for sex which I am sure you have no evidence of you cannot claim he manipulated her. He does not want to be with her anymore and he has a right to that decision just like she would also have the right to break it off with him, if she had chosen to. A guy taking a girls virginity is no guarantee of a long relationship.
Reply 17
Original post by stargirl63
Been there....honestly it sucks to hell.

The next day, my guy texted me and said there was a girl he liked for a while, and asked her out and she said yes, so we can't speak anymore. Then blocked me from every means of contact. It was absolutely horrible. But I was over it after a week of horrible crying etc. because I changed my mentality and thought I can't be giving someone so much emotion and time when they don't care. The way that I get over people is to get back in the game. It's been about 4 years since that night and since we spoke. He changed my mentality with sex, I was a girl who waited to get to fully know that person before going all the way, but then now, as I figured they can dump you just as easily on day 1 as they can during month 10 - so now I don't bother waiting anymore. Which is actually quite sad because I know that's not me.

It hurts every time I think of it as well.


It's sad that you went through this, lets be honest here we cannot fully know a persons intentions in relationship, we just have to hope our trust in them is worth it. What is most sad though for me reading your post is that you have let this guy change you.
Reply 18
Original post by Anonymous
Hi TSR

I had been talking to this lad for 6 months and i finally felt i was ready to have sex the first time was great but the second time not so much. Days later I ask if he wants to meet and he tells me he is seeing someone else . I don't understand I am a nice girl with a good job and have been told i am beautiful but its just not enough i don't get how he is seeing someone else days after we had sex. I know the best thing is to cut him off i just don't get how he has found someone else when we have been talking for months and he can cut me out when it was him doing all the messaging.


As much as I empathise with you I don't totally feel sorry for you because women in their own ways treat guys like crap. I am not sure what the problem is though it does not sound from what I have read that you two were in some serious relationship and in the end you felt comfortable with him and decided to end your virginity with him.

Obviously you invested more energy into the relationship emotionally then him and maybe believed it would last, still I do not actually think that this sounded like a serious relationship as I mentioned before it sounds like you gave it away to him because you felt he was the an alright guy.
Original post by Mancini
It's sad that you went through this, lets be honest here we cannot fully know a persons intentions in relationship, we just have to hope our trust in them is worth it. What is most sad though for me reading your post is that you have let this guy change you.


I waited 8 months before giving my virginity to him, and I know it changed me. My previous bf wondered why I was so reserved in so many other situations, and yet didn't really care about how I acted and what I thought about sex. It was just a contradiction. Even when my friends now say they are seeing someone, but want to wait a while before sleeping together, my first thought is "Why are you waiting? What are you expecting to happen in that time?" . I don't know how my mentality changed so drastically, literally overnight, but like I said , someone can dump you on date 1, just as easily as date 100 - so I feel like I have used this logicality and applied it, pretty much everywhere, so now, I just don't understand why someone would wait. Since that night, sex has never been special, it has never been an act of love or emotion, because from day one, it never was. I think of it as expression and you can be in love while having sex, but the actual act itself, I don't consider to be love. You don't need love to have sex, you don't even need to give a damn about that person to have sex (which I learned), so what's the point?

Oh god I feel to cry just typing this.

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