The Student Room Group

Do girls keep their male friends as backup boyfriends?

Is this true for SOME girls?

Do they lead guys on to keep them as backups?

Do they cockblock you from meeting other girls?

Do they have hot friends and only introduce you to other people instead?

Do they love all the attention and prevent you from giving it to other girls?

Do they essentially jerk you off and keep you coming back for more?

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No. Your questions here are nothing more than sexist bull****. Girls who are nice to you, who are friendly, have no obligation to be anything more than friendly. Just because a girl is nice to you does not mean she wants to sleep with you. They do not 'cockblock' you from meeting other girls - because they are your friend and do not see you in a sexual manner. They do not 'jerk you around' if they are nice it's because they like you Not because they want to sleep with you. If you have feelings for a female friend of yours then you should understand that they are your feelings to act upon and she is under no obligation to reciprocate. And shall we say it one more time, repeat after me: Just becuase a girl is nice to you it does not mean she wants to sleep with you!
Original post by AliceCatkins
No. Your questions here are nothing more than sexist bull****. Girls who are nice to you, who are friendly, have no obligation to be anything more than friendly. Just because a girl is nice to you does not mean she wants to sleep with you. They do not 'cockblock' you from meeting other girls - because they are your friend and do not see you in a sexual manner. They do not 'jerk you around' if they are nice it's because they like you Not because they want to sleep with you. If you have feelings for a female friend of yours then you should understand that they are your feelings to act upon and she is under no obligation to reciprocate. And shall we say it one more time, repeat after me: Just becuase a girl is nice to you it does not mean she wants to sleep with you!


Where did the women go?
No. I have a male best friend. Would never do any of that. Some of us actually care about our friends :smile:

Posted from TSR Mobile
I doubt it happens often, sounds more like a combination of self victimising and entitlement on your part. In fact it also sounds like you're only being her friend to try to shag her, so it's odd you feel hard done by.

Friendships can be unusual, I have an attractive female friend who is very cuddly/affectionate, but we've always had an understanding. I know other people may have thought there was something going on or that she was leading me on, but we've just always been like that. Some girls just have a flirty nature, it doesn't mean they're leading you on.
Yes, simply from reading the first line of your post. Doubtless, this is a TINY minority of women, but when you take any sample of size 3.5 billion you are bound to find at least some people who fit this description.
Original post by AliceCatkins
No. Your questions here are nothing more than sexist bull****. Girls who are nice to you, who are friendly, have no obligation to be anything more than friendly. Just because a girl is nice to you does not mean she wants to sleep with you. They do not 'cockblock' you from meeting other girls - because they are your friend and do not see you in a sexual manner. They do not 'jerk you around' if they are nice it's because they like you Not because they want to sleep with you. If you have feelings for a female friend of yours then you should understand that they are your feelings to act upon and she is under no obligation to reciprocate. And shall we say it one more time, repeat after me: Just becuase a girl is nice to you it does not mean she wants to sleep with you!


Lol, please leave this forum, feminist.
I sure hope not...
(edited 9 years ago)
Me personally? No. What kind of messed up logic is that? :lolwut:

Original post by RayApparently
I sure hope note...


Saying that though... I wouldn't be surprised if some girls did. :/
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by karmacrunch
Me personally? No. What kind of messed up logic is that? :lolwut:



Saying that though... I wouldn't be surprised if some girls did. :/


*shrug*
World's full of weirdos. Just watch 'The Apprentice' for confirmation.
Original post by RayApparently
*shrug*
World's full of weirdos. Just watch 'The Apprentice' for confirmation.


I've heard that it's gotten pretty bad now. :s-smilie: What's up with it?

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by karmacrunch
I've heard that it's gotten pretty bad now. :s-smilie: What's up with it?


Dunno just caught yesterday's episode on iPlayer. It was ok I guess - nothing special though.
Original post by LydiaFirefly<3
No. I have a male best friend. Would never do any of that. Some of us actually care about our friends :smile:

Posted from TSR Mobile


You are a good person. Hats off to you milady. If only others were like you.

Original post by tysonmaniac
Yes, simply from reading the first line of your post. Doubtless, this is a TINY minority of women, but when you take any sample of size 3.5 billion you are bound to find at least some people who fit this description.


Yep I think there are quite a few of uni age!

Original post by Foo.mp3
Pretty uncommon but I guess it does happen, in just the same way as some of us guys opt for FWB but then get a bit funny about those girls seeing other chaps :redface:

9 times out of 10 it does, in my humble experience :smug:


Ha I was going to say 7 out of 10, but yeah agreed! Unfortunately this is the case. Why are they like that? So SELFISH!

Original post by karmacrunch
Me personally? No. What kind of messed up logic is that? :lolwut:



Saying that though... I wouldn't be surprised if some girls did. :/
Posted from TSR Mobile


You may be a good person, but some people including some girls who are your friends are pure CRAZY. They can't be happy, so to hell with their male friend's happiness. They cockblock you. It's happening to quite a few people at my uni, including myself.
As the male friend, what do you suggest I do?
Reply 13
I am sure some do, there are some awful people out there. Not something I have encountered personally though.
Let's say maybe (MAYBE) she is keeping you as a side project/ likes you a little bit but can't make her mind up. What does it say about you that you hang around her, getting more and more bitter, just waiting for her to give you sex.

You are not friends, you are two people using each other. She's using you for security, you are using her for sex (which you aren't getting). Stop pretending to be her friend and go make some actually friends, maybe you will even meet a girl who will want to go out with you.
Original post by lucaf
I am sure some do, there are some awful people out there. Not something I have encountered personally though.


So it means they are not your friend then am I correct? What do you suggest I do?
Original post by flatmatetrouble
Let's say maybe (MAYBE) she is keeping you as a side project/ likes you a little bit but can't make her mind up. What does it say about you that you hang around her, getting more and more bitter, just waiting for her to give you sex.

You are not friends, you are two people using each other. She's using you for security, you are using her for sex (which you aren't getting). Stop pretending to be her friend and go make some actually friends, maybe you will even meet a girl who will want to go out with you.


She may not be my friend agreed. She is using me. But I am not using her for sex. WTF? I didn't find her attractive till she started trying to seduce me during her cockblocking. The entire point is that I want to meet girls and some of my friends, especially one is cockblocking me. I DID NOT START TRYING TO GET IT ON WITH MY FRIEND. I am not pretending to be her friend. I have always been a true friend and been friendly with her. She is sometimes flirting and touching me inappropriately. She also seems adamant not to introduce me to another girl on her course who I have a crush on because she is jealous of said girl. Two other friends (both girls) also on the same course think that this girl and I would be a perfect match. But they are apathetic and won't make the intro.

To clarify again, it's only the female friend who is using me. I am not using her!!

Original post by Mankytoes
I doubt it happens often, sounds more like a combination of self victimising and entitlement on your part. In fact it also sounds like you're only being her friend to try to shag her, so it's odd you feel hard done by.


No the whole point is I am not trying to get it on with her! I am trying to ask out another girl who this friend is jealous of. I think my friend is pretty, but was not attracted to her until she started to flirt and get very very touchy with me. She seems to be trying to seduce me to keep me from other girls. Every time I meet someone in halls, she keeps stepping in and stopping me from developing a conversation with a girl. I do not do that when she talks to guys. I couldn't care less! Another friend seems to talk to hundreds of hot girls, who smile at me if I'm with her at the time. But she never introduces me. Another friend knows I have a crush on a girl who she is jealous of (lots of guys on her course like this girl). Despite her other friend suggesting that this girl might like me, she doesn't want to make the intro.
Original post by flatmatetrouble
Let's say maybe (MAYBE) she is keeping you as a side project/ likes you a little bit but can't make her mind up. What does it say about you that you hang around her, getting more and more bitter, just waiting for her to give you sex.

You are not friends, you are two people using each other. She's using you for security, you are using her for sex (which you aren't getting). Stop pretending to be her friend and go make some actually friends, maybe you will even meet a girl who will want to go out with you.



She has got inside my head. I never thought about her in this way. I have been trying to meet other girls in halls and at uni campus. Every time she is around, she cockblocks me during my conversation with another hot girl. She seems to be trying to seduce me when we sit together, touching me inappropriately and making me want her. I never started this. I am not hanging around her for sex. I avoid her except when I can't back at halls. I respect her because she has been my friend when I was lonely at start of term along with two other girls at halls. That is the only reason I still hang around with her.

I fancy two girls. One at halls, who she keeps coming and interuppting our conversation when she sees it. Another is on my friend's course. 2 out of 3 think I would be a good match when I said, "Oh who's ABC btw? She sounds like fun!" but this 3rd cockblocker said "No she's not your type" and changed the subject. She repeatedly tries to block it. WHY?

Tell me why then and also how I am using her? She seems to be the sole 'user' and indeed loser in this scenario.

Your thoughts?
Original post by AliceCatkins
No. Your questions here are nothing more than sexist bull****. Girls who are nice to you, who are friendly, have no obligation to be anything more than friendly. Just because a girl is nice to you does not mean she wants to sleep with you. They do not 'cockblock' you from meeting other girls - because they are your friend and do not see you in a sexual manner. They do not 'jerk you around' if they are nice it's because they like you Not because they want to sleep with you. If you have feelings for a female friend of yours then you should understand that they are your feelings to act upon and she is under no obligation to reciprocate. And shall we say it one more time, repeat after me: Just becuase a girl is nice to you it does not mean she wants to sleep with you!



Please note I stated very clearly "SOME girls".

I know very well that there are plenty of nice girls. I have several great female friends who are my true friends. Some are closer than my guy friends. I respect and value them very much.

BUT there are also a few, who I can't avoid because they are at my halls who are my so called friends. One girl keeps interrupting my conversations when I am talking to girls at halls, especially it seems with one I told her I like. This same girl also has stopped me from meeting a major crush on her own course because apparently (according to a female and male friend) she is jealous of said girl. I don't want to sleep with my friend. She is an attention seeker. But she rubs her feet on me and suggestively licks her lips and things at me sometimes. She also has a boyfriend already, so I don't know what she is playing at. Does she really feel so insecure about my crush that she would try to seduce a friend?

Thoughts?
Original post by Anonymous
She may not be my friend agreed. She is using me. But I am not using her for sex. WTF? I didn't find her attractive till she started trying to seduce me during her cockblocking. The entire point is that I want to meet girls and some of my friends, especially one is cockblocking me. I DID NOT START TRYING TO GET IT ON WITH MY FRIEND. I am not pretending to be her friend. I have always been a true friend and been friendly with her. She is sometimes flirting and touching me inappropriately. She also seems adamant not to introduce me to another girl on her course who I have a crush on because she is jealous of said girl. Two other friends (both girls) also on the same course think that this girl and I would be a perfect match. But they are apathetic and won't make the intro.

To clarify again, it's only the female friend who is using me. I am not using her!!



You are obviously only friends/ friendly with this girl because of the promise of sex, either from her or her friends. That is called using someone, stop doing that it makes you seem creepy. Girls can spot a creep from miles away.

Also please stop using the term "cockblocking" it's vulgar and self pitying. If you want to meet this other girl, go introduce yourself. It's not like we're living in the victorian era, where you needed to be formally introduced to a woman, you can just go make conversation it's allowed.

Also stop being friends with this girl if you feel like she is being inappropriate, or better yet have an open and honest conversation with her and hopefully you can sort it out and remain friends.

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