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Friends getting excited around opposite sex members

I'm new at university and I noticed that my new "uni-buddies" (folks who follow me most of the time - thus, likely to be my future friends?) start chuckling and getting excited whenever I speak with people of the opposite sex. (like "oh, gosh! what a chick!", "go go go go!", "oh S***!" etc.)
Some even get nervous and stop speaking.

I'd like to hear what behaviour you would adopt in such situations.

I might as well try bridging the two groups, introducing my new friends to the girl/girls; could turn out to be beneficial to all three parties.

However, as you may have already experienced it, my own "aura" might suffer if associated with my... unstrategic friends.

I could simply ignore their chuckles and proceed with the girls alone, but I don't want to let down my "new friends" either.
I already did it a few times and had to see their sad faces behind me...

If they were my old friends, I could also "instruct" them on how to behave, but hey, I know them just since a few days and don't want to appear as a gang leader (not yet, at least)...

Nice problem eh?

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Reply 1

Mr.God

First off, I love the confidence. That alone makes me think that you'll come through this "problem" pretty fine, so I wouldn't worry too much about it.

I'm not totally clear what the problem is, anyway. Are the girls hearing the giggles and stuff and this is putting them off? Or is it just that it's annoying to you?

If it's that the girls are getting put off, I wouldn't risk alienating your new friends, but rather adopt a jokey approach with the girls, like "Don't worry about them, they're on day release" or "Sorry about them, they don't get out much, I'm taking them back for warm milk and cookies soon." Something to make the girls laugh and defuse the tension, but not malicious.

If it's the second thing, i.e. that it annoys you, then I'd be a little bit patronising to them until they get the jist that they look somewhat idiotic getting excited about you speaking to girls.

Reply 2

BobMob

My friends at uni were a bit like this, and they're still pretty **** with women, and are always in awe of my godlike ways with women (which, frankly, are pretty average).

I don't think they'll salt your game too much, maybe a little but nothing's ruined.

Reply 3

burningwings

Haha! Ive only experienced this in bars/clubs, from guys talking to us and his mates being like that. They normally say something like "Dont worry about them, theyre on day release", as said here already, and this works and is funny, if theyre attractive. If theyre not then it's still funny, just in a different way. Shallow but true.

Maybe your new mates'll get used to being around the opposite sex soon enough... Or get a really confident girl to go "What the hell're you on?!" or something, and look at them weirdly..Then you can defend the dude and they'll think you're nice, but the point (that this is annoying behaviour) will have been gotten across.. lol

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Okay, thanks. I'll try and let you know :smile:

Reply 5

Nick R

I'm a loud, confident lad's lad and most of my friends are female so I'm totally confident round the opposite sex. Most of my lad mates, well we big each other up infront of girls, so I can't help you as I've really never had this problem. :smile:

Reply 6

BobMob

Nick R

Thanks for that Nick.

Reply 7

notts

some of my friends are like this.

its quite surprising to be honest. are they big geeks?

i think you probably should say something to them about it.

Reply 8

The_Bear

get rid of your friends

Reply 9

TKR

Gosh. You think quite a lot of yourself don't you.

Reply 10

andyj72

cos some are proper geeky or nerdy so its a different world to them. like looking over maths or physics. its like another aspect they have to overcome.

application of .......

happens to most people, some people are goood with girls others arent. the ral problem is if you are slightly or attracted to the girl then you just blow it sometimes cos of nerves or whatever.

Reply 11

The_Bear

TKR

Gosh. You think quite a lot of yourself don't you.

What is this? Neg if you've got no mates day?

Reply 12

crafty bison

You have friends that say "gosh"?

Show them Napoleon Dynamite.

Reply 13

TKR

The_Bear

What is this? Neg if you've got no mates day?

Nice to know it got to you :smile:

Reply 14

Toscar

throw some magic cards behind you and run?

Reply 15

MagicNMedicine

Mr.God

If it's that the girls are getting put off, I wouldn't risk alienating your new friends, but rather adopt a jokey approach with the girls, like "Don't worry about them, they're on day release" or "Sorry about them, they don't get out much, I'm taking them back for warm milk and cookies soon." Something to make the girls laugh and defuse the tension, but not malicious.

not malicious???? I'd give you a Zidane if you said that about me

Reply 16

The_Bear

TKR

Nice to know it got to you :smile:

I'm just glad you aren't so cowardly as to not include your name :smile:

But really, I wouldn't stand for having such a lame group of friends. Unless they are like 14 years old.

Reply 17

Mr.God

MagicNMedicine

not malicious???? I'd give you a Zidane if you said that about me

If you had the balls to give me a Zidane, then I'd guess you're probably enough of a man not to be giggling about me talking to girls in the first place.