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Are long distance relationships worth a try?

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If your reason to go to an alternative uni is the course/it's better, then you should - your degree is for life.
If it's just that you wanted to be further from home I think you should stay. That's a stupid reason to force yourself into an LDR.

Reply 21

qwertyla

I'm in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend who is also 4 hours away. And when I go to uni next year and she gets a job, we're going to be even further apart, but that hasn't stopped me from choosing the uni I want to go to. If you love Bristol, go to Bristol. Honestly, I think that university is such a big part of your life and you would want to go to the one that you are happy with. If your relationship really is as strong as you say it is, then distance should make no difference to how much you love each other. I'm not saying it's easy, it's going to take a heck a lot of work but if you both want to sustain this relationship, working for it should be easy to do. I think that when you're in a relationship that you should be encouraging each other to be better, to achieve goals, and ultimately to assist and support each other in whatever their choices. I think if you're boyfriend can't even bare you mentioning moving away, then you should really make him listen even if he doesn't like it and just tell him why you want to go to this uni, and why it is important to you.

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Reply 22

pinkbullets

Original post by Anonymous

I'm 19, my boyfriend is 20. We've been together for two years and have a very strong relationship. He's in his second year at Cardiff Uni and I only live a 15 minute train journey or 30 minute car ride away.

However, I'm about to send off my UCAS application. I had always seen myself as attending University at least an hour away from home but now I feel as though I should go to Cardiff.

Don't get me wrong, I would be very happy at Cardiff university - I love the city and the course I'm applying to looks good. But I still can't help but feel as though I'm missing out by staying so close to home. I'm only applying to universities about an hour away from home, even though I'd love to apply to universities in Brighton, London etc., and even that's not good enough for my boyfriend - if I even mention going to a university other than Cardiff (even ones less than an hour away) he gets upset and seems to think that this means that I don't love him enough/don't want to be with him enough. I want to be close to him just as much as he wants it be he won't even let me mention it.

Of course, part of me wants to stay in Cardiff just as much as my boyfriend wants me to. I love him and if I went away I'm sure it would affect my studies for at least some of the time while at University. I also don't want it to affect our relationship. I know that people will say that we will probably break up eventually even if I stay close, but I don't want to risk it by moving far away. We have a very strong relationship but I'm sure even the strongest relationships can be challenged by distance - last year was his first year at Cardiff and, despite the short distance, even that affected our relationship to begin with (though I was struggling with some other issues at the time, too). Moving to university is a huge change and I'm sure it will be made 1000 times worse with a huge amount of distance between us.

I have quite a good chance of getting into Bristol university and I'm worried that even if I get an offer I'll have to accept Cardiff as my first rather than my second choice. I don't want to spend my life regretting not going to a better uni or going further afield, yet I also don't want to regret ruining my relationship just because I wanted to go to a different university where I ultimately probably would have had a pretty similar experience.

Does anyone have any advice? Are long-distance relationships even worth attempting?

You're going to heighten your chances of your relationship failing if you go to a university that you probably wouldn't go to otherwise just to be with your boyfriend. The resentment will in all likelihood break you up.

LDR's are always worth a shot. If you two are meant to be, then you'll work however far apart you end up. Let's face it, if he's that bothered I'm sure he can do his last year in Cardiff and then move to be closer to you. A year is nothing in the grand scheme of things.