The Student Room Group

Being single is making me nuts

Let me explain; on my 18 years on this earth I haven't so much as kissed a guy mainly due to me going through a stage of desperately wanting a boyfriend in year 8 where I behaved like a clingy weirdo as well as generally not having much contact with them (I went to an all girls school and didn't meet people out of school much).

The problem is I'm pretty sure that's made me so desperately to get some form of male attention I get crushes that aren't really crushes. Like I get it into my head I fancy a guy when really he just ticks a fair amount of my boxes. I constantly think I see signs that I like them that aren't there and it's starting to get depressing. I know I only feel that way because I'm a hopeless romantic living in a pipe dream world but the point still stands that it's making me nuts. I don't know what to do to get myself to snap out of it. HELP!

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Reply 1
Bump.
Reply 2
Go get a boyfriend then


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Reply 3
Original post by Mauryan
Go get a boyfriend then


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I can't. I seem to be too weird and awkward, least that's my guess. I wouldn't say I'm really ugly, maybe a 6 on a really good day.
This is going to sound so pessimistic but I found that my happily ever after died when I got my heart broken the first time and then buried the second time!
Reply 5
There's someone out there for everyone, coming on strong will scare some guys off, but draw others in. You'll find the one sooner or later

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Meh I can't get a girlfriend and I've been trying for ages too

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Reply 7
Original post by thel33ter
There's someone out there for everyone, coming on strong will scare some guys off, but draw others in. You'll find the one sooner or later

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I'd like to believe that but what do I do in the mean time about all these fake crushes? I never know at the time whether they're genuine because I want love so much (I really ****ing hate admitting that) and then I feel like a **** when the crush passes.
Try hitting on some guys you like? idk most girls don't make the move do they really or when they do guys don't sometimes get the hint
If you dress up nice and go to a bar with some friends some guys will hit on you 100%
Original post by stargirl63
This is going to sound so pessimistic but I found that my happily ever after died when I got my heart broken the first time and then buried the second time!


You mean your partner literally died?
Original post by Anonymous
I'd like to believe that but what do I do in the mean time about all these fake crushes? I never know at the time whether they're genuine because I want love so much (I really ****ing hate admitting that) and then I feel like a **** when the crush passes.


Make a move on it, guys generally have to make the first move, and often the next few as well unless they're built like Ryan Gosling, and like it when a girl goes for it. How long of a time period do these crushes develop over? Its human nature to desire love, there's nothing bad about that whatsoever.

Feel free to pm if you'd prefer :smile:

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Original post by Anonymous
Let me explain; on my 18 years on this earth I haven't so much as kissed a guy mainly due to me going through a stage of desperately wanting a boyfriend in year 8 where I behaved like a clingy weirdo as well as generally not having much contact with them (I went to an all girls school and didn't meet people out of school much).

The problem is I'm pretty sure that's made me so desperately to get some form of male attention I get crushes that aren't really crushes. Like I get it into my head I fancy a guy when really he just ticks a fair amount of my boxes. I constantly think I see signs that I like them that aren't there and it's starting to get depressing. I know I only feel that way because I'm a hopeless romantic living in a pipe dream world but the point still stands that it's making me nuts. I don't know what to do to get myself to snap out of it. HELP!


I felt like this last week actually. Everyone is in a relationship at uni I thought uni was the best time to get into one but they're all taken to single life forever for me

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Reply 13
Where are you based?
If it's the West Midlands I'm willing to personally travel down and give you male attention.

In the form of a verbal lecture and explanation as to why if you feel like being single drives you nuts, Christ help you when you get into a relationship and all those teensy little insecurities you're harbouring flare up and roast you alive.

Seriously, it won't help.

My offer still stands tho, js.
Reply 14
Don't panic, I'm sure with effort and patience success will come. Everyone has a cringeworthy period of dating efforts and being driven nuts by being single is what spurs us on to success. Play to your strengths, accentuate your femininity, use some friends for dating tip and most of all keep going. It will come. I was 22 when my luck started to pick up! It was a sexually frustrating period but I've things worked out well when I started work. Good luck.
Original post by Anonymous
Let me explain; on my 18 years on this earth I haven't so much as kissed a guy mainly due to me going through a stage of desperately wanting a boyfriend in year 8 where I behaved like a clingy weirdo as well as generally not having much contact with them (I went to an all girls school and didn't meet people out of school much).

The problem is I'm pretty sure that's made me so desperately to get some form of male attention I get crushes that aren't really crushes. Like I get it into my head I fancy a guy when really he just ticks a fair amount of my boxes. I constantly think I see signs that I like them that aren't there and it's starting to get depressing. I know I only feel that way because I'm a hopeless romantic living in a pipe dream world but the point still stands that it's making me nuts. I don't know what to do to get myself to snap out of it. HELP!


Haha I was exactly the same as you! If you go to uni/once you leave school you learn to become a lot more social (especially at uni). I got all the all girls school lack of boys out of me within a few months, and met my boyfriend within a few months at uni. But yes I was extremely sexually frustrated and crushed on everything that moved (including male flatmates, bad idea) for a few months. Don't worry, your time will come!
Original post by Kaiju
Where are you based?
If it's the West Midlands I'm willing to personally travel down and give you male attention.

In the form of a verbal lecture and explanation as to why if you feel like being single drives you nuts, Christ help you when you get into a relationship and all those teensy little insecurities you're harbouring flare up and roast you alive.

Seriously, it won't help.

My offer still stands tho, js.


Dude, desperate much? You don't even know if she's your type.
Reply 17
Original post by cole-slaw
Dude, desperate much? You don't even know if she's your type.

Haha.. I would have to agree with this... :biggrin:
Reply 18
Yeah. I'm desperate to give lectures, and she has to be my type for me to talk to her. Definitely.

U guise, pls read my post again ._.

EDIT: even if I was seriously trying to offer myself out, what aspect of that would make me any more desperate than OP?
All I'd be doing is offering a service, yo.
Spare us the "type" lark though, people can't be boxed up inside separate type pigeonholes. The only people who cling to typing are those unable to see that behaviours exist on a spectrum.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by The_Blade
I felt like this last week actually. Everyone is in a relationship at uni I thought uni was the best time to get into one but they're all taken to single life forever for me

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I honestly don't think i'm friends with another single person at the moment. Everyone I know is all loved up, it's hard not to let it get you down :pierre:

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