Withdraw/defer PGCE?

I'm currently on a PGCE course and I'm feeling like I want to withdraw due to health reasons. I have depression and know I've had it for months. I've had counselling which was helpful but didn't help it go away. I'm thinking of going on medication and I want to withdraw so I can get my health sorted. I've come onto the course straight from uni and I think my depression has been caused by losing my dad during university. I stayed strong and decided to carry on with my degree.. It's like I've been strong for too long now and I t
i just feel like now isn't the time to be doing it as I'm not happy and I have very low self esteem and confidence. I know that weekly observations are going to feel like criticism all the time. I know what my weaknesses are and I know that the teachers will pick up on these but I don't feel like being reminded of this will feel good.
I feel like I regret rushing onto a PGCE course now and that I'd benefit from having some time out maybe having a job as a TA and gaining more experience. I just want to feel happy and confident and I know there are things in my life that I need to sort out. Would I be able to defer my place till next September or would I have to completely withdraw? Would it be bad to have depression on my medical records like would I be less likely to get an offer?
Its a hard decision but I'm just so unhappy and I'd be better off withdrawing now before the course gets too demanding..I have only been on placement for two weeks and I had a meltdown a few days ago and I couldn't find the strength to go into placement and that's when my mum advised me to go to the doctors. She doesn't want me to drop out but she is encouraging me to do whatever I think would be best for my health and my happiness.
Any advice would be great!

Reply 1

Carnationlilyrose

Original post by Fairy93

Nothing in your post seems to say anything other than that you want to withdraw, and I'd be guided by that. Speak to the university and take their advice about deferring. I am certain they will be understanding. I really, really wouldn't advise setting out on this if you are feeling under par. The PGCE year is very, very gruelling, and so is teaching for that matter, and it's most important that you don't take on more than you can handle. It sounds very much as if you are still grieving for your dad, and having shoved that aside for a while to complete your degree, you are now going through the stage you haven't yet completed in coming to terms with it. This is all perfectly understandable. My advice would be to defer for a year, or maybe even two, do some undemanding job for a couple of years to allow yourself to recover and then tackle the PGCE when you are feeling 100%.

Reply 2

Airfairy

Hey. I have mental health problems too. I've been on placement for five weeks now. I knew before I went into the course that I'd find it tough, so on day 1 I signed up for the uni counsellor and I've been seeing him every week since. He is totally amazing and the best counsellor I've had. I don't think I'd be on the course without him.

Anyway, I would advise you to defer. Unis will normally let you do this with a doctor's note or word for uni counsellor so you shouldn't have problems if you get something from your doctor. It does sound like you rushed into it and you could spend the rest of the year focusing on getting better and coming to terms with the loss of your father a bit more.

It's not worth doing right now if it's making you ill, and to be honest, it's only going ot get harder.

I hope you feel better soon. X

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Reply 3

Fairy93

Thank you for the advice! I think it would be good if i could defer it and get myself sorted. Do you know how this may effect my student finance entitlement? Thanks :smile:

Reply 4

Mr CS

Original post by Fairy93

Thank you for the advice! I think it would be good if i could defer it and get myself sorted. Do you know how this may effect my student finance entitlement? Thanks :smile:

You'd be best off phoning them to get the situation clarified. Whatever you end up doing I wish you all success in the future.

Reply 5

Airfairy

Original post by Fairy93

Thank you for the advice! I think it would be good if i could defer it and get myself sorted. Do you know how this may effect my student finance entitlement? Thanks :smile:

I wouldn't know to be honest. I'd imagine that your loan would just pick up where you left off if that makes sense. But yes, best to give student finance a ring. I wouldn't ask your uni - from my experience the unis sometimes don't know finance details too well.

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Reply 6

Fairy93

I've decided to stay on the course at least till January to see how I feel. This way if I want to I can defer and pick up from January the following year. I've had two weeks of placement the first week was about reading so that didn't go towards the teaching percentage time but the 2nd (which is technically the 1st) has done. I'm supposed to be observed weekly and because of how I've been feeling I only went in on Monday and missed the rest of the week. I emailed deputy head who is my mentor and she was really supportive and said if I can make it in the school I should come and speak to her and she can support me but depends on what I decide to do. But I went home for the rest of the week to be around my family. I've emailed her today to say I'm going to try to complete the placement.. I'm worried I've messed my placement up now by messing around but i honestly was feeling so bad and now I've decided to stay I've feel like I've made it worse. On Monday when I was in I arranged to plan a week of phonics lessons for after half term and I was going to sort out a timetable or teaching plans with the class teacher. I just feel like I've made it so bad by not going in. I've made myself look unprofessional.. I feel really bad and I have apologised to the teachers.