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I don't know how to escalate with girls

I have a problem in my dating: I just don't know how to escalate things and my dates end up feeling like two friends going out, instead of something that could lead to something more romantic. I don't get kisses, not to mention anything even remotely towards a hook up.

As background, I'm in my mid 20s and living working in London. I get my dates either via Tinder or online and its usually to a bar for the first date and then perhaps something more creative later on (if things get to a second date).

However they all just feel kind of friendly. I don't know how to escalate things with a girl from something platonic/friendly towards something more romantic/sexual. It's usually just a hug at the end of the night and that's it.

Anyone know what I should be doing on dates to make them progress romantically?
Initiate a bit of physical contact before the end of the night by holding her hand as you walk along or flirtatiously tickling her. Make it clear that you are interested in more than friendship simply by commenting on how pretty she looks!
Original post by Anonymous
I have a problem in my dating: I just don't know how to escalate things and my dates end up feeling like two friends going out, instead of something that could lead to something more romantic. I don't get kisses, not to mention anything even remotely towards a hook up.

As background, I'm in my mid 20s and living working in London. I get my dates either via Tinder or online and its usually to a bar for the first date and then perhaps something more creative later on (if things get to a second date).

However they all just feel kind of friendly. I don't know how to escalate things with a girl from something platonic/friendly towards something more romantic/sexual. It's usually just a hug at the end of the night and that's it.

Anyone know what I should be doing on dates to make them progress romantically?


Show your intentions be bold and don't hold back your emotions if you treat her like a friend then that's all you'll be. It may be out of your comfort zone but before you can escalate you have to initiate.
Compliments and flirtatious teasing/jokes go a long way. Even tone of voice and how you look at someone really makes a difference in going from friend to friendlier....
Original post by Frenspan14
Compliments and flirtatious teasing/jokes go a long way. Even tone of voice and how you look at someone really makes a difference in going from friend to friendlier....



Why would OP want to be friendlier, your setting him up for failure bad advice.
Original post by Black Cat
Why would OP want to be friendlier, your setting him up for failure bad advice.


Friendlier is a euphemism for more sexual/flirty. Watch The Princess Diaries!! Shameful reference, I know...
Original post by Frenspan14
Friendlier is a euphemism for more sexual/flirty. Watch The Princess Diaries!! Shameful reference, I know...


Never seen it sounds like some fantasy novel.
Original post by Black Cat
Never seen it sounds like some fantasy novel.


It's a chick flick from my teenage days. I guess the euphemism and ellipsis were wasted :redface:
Original post by Frenspan14
It's a chick flick from my teenage days. I guess the euphemism and ellipsis were wasted :redface:


That says enough really.
Things tend to escalate with time. Trying to work out how to go from 0 to 100 miles an hour on the first date is daft, there is no magic formula for making things happen faster. Just go with the flow. Or if you really want the certainty of sex, hire an escort.
(edited 9 years ago)
Test a missile or conduct some military exercises that encroach on her borders.
Never mind escalating, it sounds like you don't even know how to flirt.
Original post by Anonymous
I have a problem in my dating: I just don't know how to escalate things and my dates end up feeling like two friends going out, instead of something that could lead to something more romantic. I don't get kisses, not to mention anything even remotely towards a hook up.

As background, I'm in my mid 20s and living working in London. I get my dates either via Tinder or online and its usually to a bar for the first date and then perhaps something more creative later on (if things get to a second date).

However they all just feel kind of friendly. I don't know how to escalate things with a girl from something platonic/friendly towards something more romantic/sexual. It's usually just a hug at the end of the night and that's it.

Anyone know what I should be doing on dates to make them progress romantically?



Hi OP! I'm 24 and working in London - PM me! :smile:

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