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Have a check on your uni's 'societies' lists.
Many of them have one's at this time of year specifically for coping with 'home-sickness'.
It is so common to feel like this - you really are not alone, there are many, many freshers who feel the same.
Expectations of uni life are built out of all proportion, being led to believe it's just one big party - when the reality can be that it is scarey, lonely and overwhelming. Find people of similar sensitivity and all cope together.
Many of them have one's at this time of year specifically for coping with 'home-sickness'.
It is so common to feel like this - you really are not alone, there are many, many freshers who feel the same.
Expectations of uni life are built out of all proportion, being led to believe it's just one big party - when the reality can be that it is scarey, lonely and overwhelming. Find people of similar sensitivity and all cope together.
If you have a genuine reason why you want to move accommodation, the Uni will do their best to accommodate your need. At least at my Uni anyway! I didn't get on with the people I lived with last year & as a consequence, me & a friend requested to be moved & we were allowed to.
Best thing to do is try other alternatives. A move can be unsettling. Like others have suggested, try joining societies. You've only been there a short time, give yourself chance. Most people don't often find their friendship group till later on & you often find the people you would regard as friends now will not be who you socialise with later.
Stick with it. Talk to a councilor or tutor. They are there for this. I know you may not think it, but there will be a lot of people in the same boat as you right now.
Best thing to do is try other alternatives. A move can be unsettling. Like others have suggested, try joining societies. You've only been there a short time, give yourself chance. Most people don't often find their friendship group till later on & you often find the people you would regard as friends now will not be who you socialise with later.
Stick with it. Talk to a councilor or tutor. They are there for this. I know you may not think it, but there will be a lot of people in the same boat as you right now.
Oren
Oh, get over it, If there's no people in your block then join a club, that way you make friends, did you live in the same places as your friends from secondary school, cos I didnt, Mine lived upto 30miles away!! you can have friends and go out without living in the same halls as people.
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
God you are a close-minded arse. Some people find it easier to pluck up the courage and do things than others and it must obviously be extremely difficult for the OP otherwise he/she wouldn't have posted here for support. If you're just going to put people down when they have a problem and make them feel even crappier then I don't think there's much point of you posting to threads like this. What a complete dick you are.
CheesyBeans
I'm good mates with my housemates because we all moved in as freshers last year. However, I have to retake my first year and I find it really hard to just start talking to people as I'm very shy. I'm living with all lads and would love to have some female friends. The girls I lived with last year moved in to halls, one left because she fell out with everyone and one just decided to quit uni altogether. The ones I do know I don't see much as they have their own groups of close mates. It's really easy for people to say "just start talking to people in lectures" but it's hard for me to actually do. Even if I did, I'd feel a bit stupid explaining that I'm retaking. Plus everyone seemed to be in groups of mates within the first two lectures.
Will the accommodation people not even put you on a waiting list for other halls. Most places have people dropping out before xmas and usually have spare rooms. I think my uni puts people who have to share a room on the waiting list for a single room automatically.
Try to find out if theres someone/somewhere you can go to talk to someone face to face rather than by telephone. There should be a student guidance place on campus.
Will the accommodation people not even put you on a waiting list for other halls. Most places have people dropping out before xmas and usually have spare rooms. I think my uni puts people who have to share a room on the waiting list for a single room automatically.
Try to find out if theres someone/somewhere you can go to talk to someone face to face rather than by telephone. There should be a student guidance place on campus.
Yeah i found that too everyone already seems to know eachother. What subject are you doing?
JimmyJ
What do you mean, "He won't move you".
You're paying. It's your right.
Demand you get moved.
You're paying. It's your right.
Demand you get moved.
what a moronic comment.
never heard of a tenancy agreement???
i felt like sh*t during my first week... in fact, this week was pretty dire too, but not AS bad as the previous week. i'm staying for at least another few weeks though, on the basis that it seems to be getting marginally better day by day. it's such a huge change... don't expect to miraculously be able to readjust to a new way of life in a week. i'm living at home and it's a bit of a shock to me, so i imagine it'll be a whole lot more challenging for you.
at the end of the day, if you really can't see yourself spending 3 years there, you can always leave. i strongly advise that you give it a chance though, or talk with friends from home/relatives. or move out, into a flat nearby your uni, where there are people? that's providing that you haven't paid your rent in advance.
at the end of the day, if you really can't see yourself spending 3 years there, you can always leave. i strongly advise that you give it a chance though, or talk with friends from home/relatives. or move out, into a flat nearby your uni, where there are people? that's providing that you haven't paid your rent in advance.
Lucy_88
Yeah i found that too everyone already seems to know eachother. What subject are you doing?
Psychology and Criminology. Hopefully I'll get talking to people in the lab classes because we have to work in groups sometimes.
I have quit my degree. But that was only because I was studying at my local higher education college which had 80% students over 30 and it had no student's union and I lived at home. Now THAT really didn't allow for much social life! I am reapplying for next year but OP, you are very lucky because there really are loads of opportunities for you to socialise. At the student's union there will be loads of people who want to help you/be your friend, there are also some pretty random societies at uni so I'm sure you'll find something that interests you! It might be, in a way, quite good that there aren't many people in your block because a lot of other posts in this forum are about people who are unhappy because their flatmates keep them up till stupid o' clock in the morning and also some people get bullied by students that they live with, at least you won't have that. If you are still concerned after a fortnight then try again to get moved, the people in charge of accomodation will take you more seriously if you have stuck it out for a bit and are still unhappy. At the moment, you are probably quite generally unsettled, you need to give it maybe just a little more time before you consider your options. I know I might sound hypocritical because I myself have dropped out but I didn't really have any other way out-you are lucky to be away at uni where there's loads of cool stuff! Also, in response to your concerns about not enjoying the lectures, all of my friends are finding it difficult, the workload is really different from A-level but I agree with what other people on this thread have said-tell someone high up about your worries and they can sort you out/help you switch courses. Hang in there mate!
It might be, in a way, quite good that there aren't many people in your block because a lot of other posts in this forum are about people who are unhappy because their flatmates keep them up till stupid o' clock in the morning and also some people get bullied by students that they live with, at least you won't have that. If you are still concerned after a fortnight then try again to get moved, the people in charge of accomodation will take you more seriously if you have stuck it out for a bit and are still unhappy. At the moment, you are probably quite generally unsettled, you need to give it maybe just a little more time before you consider your options. I know I might sound hypocritical because I myself have dropped out but I didn't really have any other way out-you are lucky to be away at uni where there's loads of cool stuff! Also, in response to your concerns about not enjoying the lectures, all of my friends are finding it difficult, the workload is really different from A-level but I agree with what other people on this thread have said-tell someone high up about your worries and they can sort you out/help you switch courses. Hang in there mate!Oren
Oh, get over it, If there's no people in your block then join a club, that way you make friends, did you live in the same places as your friends from secondary school, cos I didnt, Mine lived upto 30miles away!! you can have friends and go out without living in the same halls as people.
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
So what, you feel unwell, I have a bitch of a cold at the moment and sore throat and headaches, I still go out though, still talk to people! some people just seem to like taking the easy route and complaining when things dont go their way, try getting off your bum and sorting yourself out!
As for not liking the uni your at and your lectures, there was an awful lot of choice when you chose where to go last year, maybe you should've given it more thought!!
Gee, you're a nice person.
Not exactly the way to encourage the OP into making friends when there are 'caring' people like you about.
Even getting through the first week is a bit of an achievement- I know people who are really strongand confident, yet still crack under pressure of starting afresh in a new environment miles from home. Make the most of your time there and eventually things will be better.
University is full of up and downs. Ive had a kick ass week, been out 8 times in freshers which was really about 10 days. Today however the cool housemates have gone home for the weekend, the girl id been talking to didnt text me back, therefore its been not such a good day. But my Hong Kong people have invited me up theres tonight which is going to be funny as there all mad. Just stick with it, things can turn around so easily.
The first week can be demoralising. All of my friends were made to feel, in part, miserable by it. The trick about freshers' week is that you see the most confident, bombastic people out and about in the union, etc., and so this is how you think everybody is! Of course, it's not true. It usually takes time to understand the diversity of people you get at university, and I'm sure that, in time, you'll make friends with some of them.
As for the academic side of things, if you hate your degree that much, consider a conversion. If nothing else attracts you, maybe you ought to consider whether university is really the place for you.
Give it time.
As for the academic side of things, if you hate your degree that much, consider a conversion. If nothing else attracts you, maybe you ought to consider whether university is really the place for you.
Give it time.
give it some more time i have just atrted uni and im not havin the great time i thought i would but im gonna try and stick it out for a while at least. However if you do decide that uni is not for you go ad see your welfare service at uni ASAP and find out bout repayment of tutition fees as you may not be charged the full amount if you leave before a certain date. good luck but remember if you really hate it and leave its not a big deal it will give you a chance to work/travel/volunteer and really consider where to go in the future, at the end of the day your happyness is the most important thing. Its only one year and alot of people take a gap year before starting uni!
i was feeling a bit lost in that i'd only really made friends with 2 people in my first week, but the 3rd yr girl in my block told me that freshers week is completely different to the rest of uni.. after a few weeks or so everyone settles down and starts working and is actually 'themself' again... and thats when you're most likely to meet people.
joining clubs and societies is probably the best way to meet like-minded people, and thats what i intend to do.
theres probably a lot of people feeling like you do right now so i assure you, you're not alone
joining clubs and societies is probably the best way to meet like-minded people, and thats what i intend to do.
theres probably a lot of people feeling like you do right now so i assure you, you're not alone
Hey again
My parents have rang up the accommodation office and they still refusing to move me, depsite there being free rooms (well they say they're full but they're not). My flat mate is a nice guy but he is different sort of person than me if you know what I mean.
I have been sharing a bedroom all my life with 2 other brothers and I was really looking forward to my own space and making lots of friends. I haven't been able to have either. There is still no people on the block. It's awfully quiet, I don't like it one bit. I haven't eaten for 2 days, I've been getting paraletic to ease the pain a little.
I haven't met any people who I can call a friend. I've rang my personal tutor and she isn't answering her phone (that was yesterday). I've rang the support line, again, no answer. I've been ringing my Mum all day, crying, she keeps telling me to hold on etc. How on earth can things get better when there is no one on the block and there won't be during the year?
What si worst still, speaking to friends on MSN who are having a brilliant Freshers. My eyes are so red and I haven't been able to sleep. I',m an emotional wreck and I have to bite my hands to stop me from crying (doesn't work a lot of the times). I'm NO drama queen, just been through so much crap at home during the last 12 months I had high expectations from university, none, literally none have been granted.
My parents have rang up the accommodation office and they still refusing to move me, depsite there being free rooms (well they say they're full but they're not). My flat mate is a nice guy but he is different sort of person than me if you know what I mean.
I have been sharing a bedroom all my life with 2 other brothers and I was really looking forward to my own space and making lots of friends. I haven't been able to have either. There is still no people on the block. It's awfully quiet, I don't like it one bit. I haven't eaten for 2 days, I've been getting paraletic to ease the pain a little.
I haven't met any people who I can call a friend. I've rang my personal tutor and she isn't answering her phone (that was yesterday). I've rang the support line, again, no answer. I've been ringing my Mum all day, crying, she keeps telling me to hold on etc. How on earth can things get better when there is no one on the block and there won't be during the year?
What si worst still, speaking to friends on MSN who are having a brilliant Freshers. My eyes are so red and I haven't been able to sleep. I',m an emotional wreck and I have to bite my hands to stop me from crying (doesn't work a lot of the times). I'm NO drama queen, just been through so much crap at home during the last 12 months I had high expectations from university, none, literally none have been granted.
Hi, I see you posted 5 days ago, but I hope you're still there.
> The first thing I can say is, see all of the above. ^ I sympathise, I really, really do.
> Secondly, go down, get something to eat, go and (a) sit down with some people and smalltalk - they won't mind, I promise; or (b) get a paper/book and sit on your own. The more you don't eat, the worse you will feel. Illness will only make you unhappier.
> Thirdly, thank goodness for your mother and your friends on msn. Imagine how lost you'd feel completely on your own. At least you weren't trying to escape horrendous parents, and now you've got them to turn to. Tell your friends about your situation - I told mine about my downs as well as my ups, and in the first week the downs are going to be more frequent for many, many people.
> Remember, each to his/her own - not everybody makes friends at the same speed, and some people adjust faster or slower than others. Don't be pressured by what's going on around you. Let your life run its natural course.
> I've known people to be unhappy for a while at university. For many, there's no magic turnaround at the end of week 1, nor necessarily at the end of week 2. But I don't think I know anyone who stayed unhappy for their entire time there. I'm sure by the end of the first year, things will have turned full circle for you. As for those people who leave - I think they're letting their pessimistic side get the better of them.
> Have a bath. Make a cup of tea. Read a Bill Bryson book.
I hope things have improved since you last posted.
> The first thing I can say is, see all of the above. ^ I sympathise, I really, really do.
> Secondly, go down, get something to eat, go and (a) sit down with some people and smalltalk - they won't mind, I promise; or (b) get a paper/book and sit on your own. The more you don't eat, the worse you will feel. Illness will only make you unhappier.
> Thirdly, thank goodness for your mother and your friends on msn. Imagine how lost you'd feel completely on your own. At least you weren't trying to escape horrendous parents, and now you've got them to turn to. Tell your friends about your situation - I told mine about my downs as well as my ups, and in the first week the downs are going to be more frequent for many, many people.
> Remember, each to his/her own - not everybody makes friends at the same speed, and some people adjust faster or slower than others. Don't be pressured by what's going on around you. Let your life run its natural course.
> I've known people to be unhappy for a while at university. For many, there's no magic turnaround at the end of week 1, nor necessarily at the end of week 2. But I don't think I know anyone who stayed unhappy for their entire time there. I'm sure by the end of the first year, things will have turned full circle for you. As for those people who leave - I think they're letting their pessimistic side get the better of them.
> Have a bath. Make a cup of tea. Read a Bill Bryson book.
I hope things have improved since you last posted.
One more thought...
If you're still there, and still finding it very hard work - and I expect things will still be difficult - do stick it out for a year.
If you quit at this stage, that will result in three big problems:
1. If you try applying again, universities will look at your record, see someone who dropped out after a matter of weeks and ask, "why should we risk a place on this person?"
2. If you quit without seeing it out for a year, you won't ever quite know if it would have got better in time, and, what's more - if you try again you'll be no more prepared if you quit now. If you manage the year, and decide rationally to drop out then, you'll be much stronger when trying again. You will. If you quit now you will lose all faith in yourself.
3. Finally, right now your misery might get the better of your rational mind. At least if you see the year through, and still dislike it, you can make a rational choice. If you leave now, you'll go home and be just as depressed.
The thing is, if you hold on, I'm positive things will get better. If you dislike it at the end of the year, then you know for sure that it's not the place for you. Then you can say, without doubt, you're ready to drop out and think again.
I hope you're still there and things are better. Remember, you've got years and years ahead of you; not everything has to fall into place right away. I'd be surprised if it did.
If you're still there, and still finding it very hard work - and I expect things will still be difficult - do stick it out for a year.
If you quit at this stage, that will result in three big problems:
1. If you try applying again, universities will look at your record, see someone who dropped out after a matter of weeks and ask, "why should we risk a place on this person?"
2. If you quit without seeing it out for a year, you won't ever quite know if it would have got better in time, and, what's more - if you try again you'll be no more prepared if you quit now. If you manage the year, and decide rationally to drop out then, you'll be much stronger when trying again. You will. If you quit now you will lose all faith in yourself.
3. Finally, right now your misery might get the better of your rational mind. At least if you see the year through, and still dislike it, you can make a rational choice. If you leave now, you'll go home and be just as depressed.
The thing is, if you hold on, I'm positive things will get better. If you dislike it at the end of the year, then you know for sure that it's not the place for you. Then you can say, without doubt, you're ready to drop out and think again.
I hope you're still there and things are better.
Remember, you've got years and years ahead of you; not everything has to fall into place right away. I'd be surprised if it did.Related discussions
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