The Student Room Group

What should I do about this girl? Please help

My female friend (who I like, asked out 6 months ago, got rejected, (she had a bf), guess you can say friendzoned).

Anyway today she messaged me saying she will go to the cinema with one of her guy friends (who LIKES her) and another female.

I said oh thats cool. But really, I was bothered by it inside. Then a minute later, I said, "what about me? lol".

Then she says "Oh but there is (guy friend) lol. Let me ask them yh?"

I said ok cool. But then I wrote "It's ok don't worry. We can go another time yh?"

And then she wrote: "I won't promise u"

Now at this point I really got annoyed and upset. We had this incident during the summer holidays where she promised to meet up. She promised 3-4 times and flaked every time and never came in the end.
I made a thread about this a while back, some of you may remember?

Anyway, then I said to her:

"Wow. It means no. Why saying yes to other people. And no to me. Is there a reason?"

And then said wrote:

"Shut up. I didn't say no. I said no promise. Hey man read carefully. And u ask me and I am saying. So u just respect. U can't argue. Coz if I say yes...it means I have go to. That's why i'm not saying anything. And I can say no. U can't ask me why or u can't argue for that. I'm sorry."

*OUCH*

That really hurt. I havent replied to that message. I don't know what to say :/

What should I do? I'm really upset, she can't say yes to me but she saying yes to her other guy friend (who is giving her so much attention it's a joke)

Ahhh please help me :frown: I really like her and it hurts

Scroll to see replies

Original post by believeteam22
My female friend (who I like, asked out 6 months ago, got rejected, (she had a bf), guess you can say friendzoned).

Anyway today she messaged me saying she will go to the cinema with one of her guy friends (who LIKES her) and another female.

I said oh thats cool. But really, I was bothered by it inside. Then a minute later, I said, "what about me? lol".

Then she says "Oh but there is (guy friend) lol. Let me ask them yh?"

I said ok cool. But then I wrote "It's ok don't worry. We can go another time yh?"

And then she wrote: "I won't promise u"

Now at this point I really got annoyed and upset. We had this incident during the summer holidays where she promised to meet up. She promised 3-4 times and flaked every time and never came in the end.
I made a thread about this a while back, some of you may remember?

Anyway, then I said to her:

"Wow. It means no. Why saying yes to other people. And no to me. Is there a reason?"

And then said wrote:

"Shut up. I didn't say no. I said no promise. Hey man read carefully. And u ask me and I am saying. So u just respect. U can't argue. Coz if I say yes...it means I have go to. That's why i'm not saying anything. And I can say no. U can't ask me why or u can't argue for that. I'm sorry."

*OUCH*

That really hurt. I havent replied to that message. I don't know what to say :/

What should I do? I'm really upset, she can't say yes to me but she saying yes to her other guy friend (who is giving her so much attention it's a joke)

Ahhh please help me :frown: I really like her and it hurts


You're not entitled to be invited to every event/gathering. No ones entitled to anything. Clearly she wants to spend some time with this guy who likes her and I assume she likes back. Time to back off completely unfortunately and move on.


Posted from TSR Mobile
Yeah I remember you...looks like you fell back into your old ways of feeling entitled to her attention. Seriously cut her out your life because you can't deal with her being in your life quite clearly.
Original post by Olderandwiser23
You're not entitled to be invited to every event/gathering. No ones entitled to anything. Clearly she wants to spend some time with this guy who likes her and I assume she likes back. Time to back off completely unfortunately and move on.


Posted from TSR Mobile


Well she has a bf, so I don't think she likes him. As a friend only yes. However, I do know that she loves the attention that he gives her. She admitted this to me herself.

But she's my friend at the end of the day.

I feel really upset about it. She says yes to him but when I ask, there is always a problem. :/

I didn't reply to her message. I don't even know what to say.
Original post by believeteam22
Well she has a bf, so I don't think she likes him. As a friend only yes. However, I do know that she loves the attention that he gives her. She admitted this to me herself.

But she's my friend at the end of the day.

I feel really upset about it. She says yes to him but when I ask, there is always a problem. :/

I didn't reply to her message. I don't even know what to say.


Perhaps she doesn't consider you a friend?


Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by SophieSmall
Yeah I remember you...looks like you fell back into your old ways of feeling entitled to her attention. Seriously cut her out your life because you can't deal with her being in your life quite clearly.


I remember you too. Yh I guess I did :/

It's difficult to do that. I see her all the time. She's in all my classes and I don't want to have to make things worse.

But in the current situation, what do you suggest I do? You read what she wrote. What can I reply to that.

I don't understand why she can say yes to him but no to me. I am her friend first and foremost. The other guy, he just likes her and is doing everything for her. And she knows he likes her and she is just loving the attention.

Maybe I am feeling jealous..but I really don't feel good about this whole thing right now :frown:
Go no contact.
Ok I will reply to the individual posts in a sec but here is what has happened:


I decided to not reply to her message which I wrote in the original post.


And just now, she messaged me saying:


"When I say something u have to reply. If you don't want to reply just say it. Don't make me angry."


hahah! Is this girl stupid or something? Who does she think she is? "If you don't want to reply just say it." - HOW are you supposed to do that? Such an idiot. I am fuming.


And I was gonna not reply again but I decided to write this: "Erm actually, I don't have to do anything I don't wanna do. If I don't wanna msg i wont msg. if i do wanna msg i will. if you don't reply to my msgs then thats fine too."


And she replied: "Loool I don't have to go with u then u cant argue with me its stupid. U r like 10 years old. I dont care if you don't message".


Ouch. :/


I replied: "Ok good luck"


And then she replied again: "Good luck..why? for what? why saying that man"


Well..her tone changed here quite suddenly..


I think she thinks I implied, ok good luck, you're on your own now, don't expect me to help u with anything.. that's what i think anyway..


And I help this girl a lot. And the way she is talking it like she just threw everything back at my face. She is so unappreciative.


She is saying things like "I don't care" etc..


So what do I do now? Do I reply to her last message?
Leave it for a day. If she texts again then maybe reply but consider what she is saying. She obviously values your participation in her life but she's afraid to lose your friendship over a disagreement. Let her calm down then reply saying something like I'm sorry for snapping. That should make her feel better and she'll probably apologise too.
Original post by PrincipissaMundi
Leave it for a day. If she texts again then maybe reply but consider what she is saying. She obviously values your participation in her life but she's afraid to lose your friendship over a disagreement. Let her calm down then reply saying something like I'm sorry for snapping. That should make her feel better and she'll probably apologise too.



I replied to her "Nothing. to be honest I got a headache atm so I dont feel like talking"

And she replied "Okkk"

U really she values my friendship? Why is she saying "I don't care" then?
Reply 10
tell her to speak better english lol. U deserve better
Original post by believeteam22
My female friend (who I like, asked out 6 months ago, got rejected, (she had a bf), guess you can say friendzoned).

Anyway today she messaged me saying she will go to the cinema with one of her guy friends (who LIKES her) and another female.

I said oh thats cool. But really, I was bothered by it inside. Then a minute later, I said, "what about me? lol".

Then she says "Oh but there is (guy friend) lol. Let me ask them yh?"

I said ok cool. But then I wrote "It's ok don't worry. We can go another time yh?"

And then she wrote: "I won't promise u"

Now at this point I really got annoyed and upset. We had this incident during the summer holidays where she promised to meet up. She promised 3-4 times and flaked every time and never came in the end.
I made a thread about this a while back, some of you may remember?

Anyway, then I said to her:

"Wow. It means no. Why saying yes to other people. And no to me. Is there a reason?"

And then said wrote:

"Shut up. I didn't say no. I said no promise. Hey man read carefully. And u ask me and I am saying. So u just respect. U can't argue. Coz if I say yes...it means I have go to. That's why i'm not saying anything. And I can say no. U can't ask me why or u can't argue for that. I'm sorry."

*OUCH*

That really hurt. I havent replied to that message. I don't know what to say :/

What should I do? I'm really upset, she can't say yes to me but she saying yes to her other guy friend (who is giving her so much attention it's a joke)

Ahhh please help me :frown: I really like her and it hurts


Get the hint

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Jesties
tell her to speak better english lol. U deserve better


hahah good one. Yup her english is poor tbh lo
Original post by TH3-FL45H


But we are supposed to be friends. I have known her for more than a year...
Original post by believeteam22
My female friend (who I like, asked out 6 months ago, got rejected, (she had a bf), guess you can say friendzoned).

Anyway today she messaged me saying she will go to the cinema with one of her guy friends (who LIKES her) and another female.

I said oh thats cool. But really, I was bothered by it inside. Then a minute later, I said, "what about me? lol".

Then she says "Oh but there is (guy friend) lol. Let me ask them yh?"

I said ok cool. But then I wrote "It's ok don't worry. We can go another time yh?"

And then she wrote: "I won't promise u"

Now at this point I really got annoyed and upset. We had this incident during the summer holidays where she promised to meet up. She promised 3-4 times and flaked every time and never came in the end.
I made a thread about this a while back, some of you may remember?

Anyway, then I said to her:

"Wow. It means no. Why saying yes to other people. And no to me. Is there a reason?"

And then said wrote:

"Shut up. I didn't say no. I said no promise. Hey man read carefully. And u ask me and I am saying. So u just respect. U can't argue. Coz if I say yes...it means I have go to. That's why i'm not saying anything. And I can say no. U can't ask me why or u can't argue for that. I'm sorry."

*OUCH*

That really hurt. I havent replied to that message. I don't know what to say :/

What should I do? I'm really upset, she can't say yes to me but she saying yes to her other guy friend (who is giving her so much attention it's a joke)

Ahhh please help me :frown: I really like her and it hurts


Every single post you've ever made has been about this. Don't let her ruin your life; think it's time to let her go.

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by believeteam22
But we are supposed to be friends. I have known her for more than a year...


That sounded a bit douchey sorry.

Maybe she doesn't want to be more than friends. It would better for both of you if you just let it go.

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by believeteam22
My female friend (who I like, asked out 6 months ago, got rejected, (she had a bf), guess you can say friendzoned).

Anyway today she messaged me saying she will go to the cinema with one of her guy friends (who LIKES her) and another female.

I said oh thats cool. But really, I was bothered by it inside. Then a minute later, I said, "what about me? lol".

Then she says "Oh but there is (guy friend) lol. Let me ask them yh?"

I said ok cool. But then I wrote "It's ok don't worry. We can go another time yh?"

And then she wrote: "I won't promise u"

Now at this point I really got annoyed and upset. We had this incident during the summer holidays where she promised to meet up. She promised 3-4 times and flaked every time and never came in the end.
I made a thread about this a while back, some of you may remember?

Anyway, then I said to her:

"Wow. It means no. Why saying yes to other people. And no to me. Is there a reason?"

And then said wrote:

"Shut up. I didn't say no. I said no promise. Hey man read carefully. And u ask me and I am saying. So u just respect. U can't argue. Coz if I say yes...it means I have go to. That's why i'm not saying anything. And I can say no. U can't ask me why or u can't argue for that. I'm sorry."

*OUCH*

That really hurt. I havent replied to that message. I don't know what to say :/

What should I do? I'm really upset, she can't say yes to me but she saying yes to her other guy friend (who is giving her so much attention it's a joke)

Ahhh please help me :frown: I really like her and it hurts


She sounds quite.... cold. As well as immature. You really do sound better off shot entirely to be honest- I'd find someone more deserving to spend your time with. The last text in particular sounds like she kind of likes the power. As a girl if a friend asked me out, I would never give an inconclusive response. It either be a yes, or a no but with an explicit understanding that I'm still happy to see them as a friend. Nothing bugs me more than people letting feelings like that ruin a friendship- it's needless and nasty to lead people into thinking they'll meet up when you have no intention of doing so.

TL:biggrin:R - move on, she sounds awful.
Original post by believeteam22


"When I say something u have to reply. If you don't want to reply just say it. Don't make me angry."



If anyone sent me a text like that, I'd block their number and tell them to never message me again. Aint nobody got time for dat.

Man up, start treating yourself with respect, get rid of her
Original post by Quantum Confinement
Every single post you've ever made has been about this. Don't let her ruin your life; think it's time to let her go.

Posted from TSR Mobile


I know :/

I can't seem to let it go. I see her all the time. I have to face her all the time and it's painful. If I didn't have to see her all the time then maybe it would be easier. But for now, this is what it is. And I am really struggling with it :/
Original post by TH3-FL45H
That sounded a bit douchey sorry.

Maybe she doesn't want to be more than friends. It would better for both of you if you just let it go.

Posted from TSR Mobile


Ahh my bad. I know. She has a bf. But she is willing to go to the cinema with her other guy friend, and I guess I got jealous and annoyed because when I asked if we could go another time, she basically said no.

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending