Does it put you off if a guy is a wimp?

The thing is, no girl is going to go out with you out of sympathy. They usually want to feel secure, like the guy is going to stand up for them. I got picked on at school and I know it's horrible, I couldn't really do much then because I was tiny, the smallest kid in the whole school. But now, I would always stand up for my girlfriend. It isn't like you've got to follow some alpha male crap, it's just about that feeling of security.

With being bullied, it's like if a girl was twenty stone, but she explained it wasn't her fault, she has a medical condition, guys aren't suddenly going to say "aw, ok then, I will go out with you". It isn't that your attitude is necessarily your own fault, but women, like men, can't help what they find attractive.

Say if the guy is easily threatened, bullying or intimated and doesn't hold is own in a difficult situation. Is likely to run off id things turn ugly.

I don't expect girls to go out with me cos of sympathy, i've changed my outlook on things since i was in school (it was like 6 years ago)

Ok, I'm not sure I got your point then, it sounded like you were talking in present tense.

Girls does it put you off if a guy is a wimp? Likewise does it make you more attracted to a guy if he has balls or is assertive?

Now the part about you having lower self confidence "due to being bullied" is incorrect. No-one can make you who you are. You need to not talk about the past again and realise that right now you can live any life that you want. If you don't want a different life and are happy continuing to say you have low self-confidence, then that's fine but you are not hard done by and people are free to criticise that fact.

It would be an amazing power to be able to freely control what emotions you feel at any given time, and from personal experience I've come to realize that far more people have this power than I ever could have guessed. But I can certainly empathize with someone who does not have that power, telling someone to use that power is like trying to tell someone to speak when they have never learned any type of language.

Bullying is socially isolating, and social isolation leads to a lack of building of vital skills for the future at an age where they still don't understand that they need to build these skills (and if the isolation is bad enough, they may not learn what skills they need until they actually come to the point of needing them and wondering why they can't perform like everybody else). It's a sick form of brainwashing where the majority tell an individual that they're wrong, weak, ugly, and because it's the majority opinion, the individual believes it. It's a campaign against a person that goes on day after day, sometimes without respite or any means of retaliation. For some who do retaliate it leaves a black mark against their name for the rest of their academic life. So yes, someone can come out of bullying severely affected by it on a very real level.

I agree that does not excuse complete denial of the issue, running away from it, never making any efforts to improve or get help, these things are cowardly. However I wouldn't call wimp to someone who is struggling but making a good honest effort to improve themselves and face their darkest fears and insecurities, but still recognizes that what they went through wasn't acceptable.

At first glance, this is a long post from someone I wasn't addressing. I agree, bullying is bad. But we live in the real world and unfortunately (or fortunately depending how you look at it) your past does not make your present any better. Also no-one's calling anyone a wimp, but if someone thinks they are a wimp then the fact they were bullied does not improve the way they are seen by girls, which is what this thread is about.

Some of you guys are fools if you think being tough makes you a better man. You forget some people get killed from knife attacks because theyve been standing up to the wrong type of people

How does it feel to be a weakling who wants to depend on a guy to protect her?

Some of you guys are fools if you think being tough makes you a better man. You forget some people get killed from knife attacks because theyve been standing up to the wrong type of people

Lets also remember there are tough men out there that beat the **** out of their wife and kids.

I do hope you're not confusing being a nice guy with being a wimp, you can still be a nice guy and be assertive and have confidence

But anyway to answer the question, provided the (girl in my case) doesn't come off as a female Tony Stark (Narssastic etc.) then confidence is always an attractive quality, but shyness and be rather cute