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Am I being paranoid about pregnancy?

So basically back in September I had unprotected sex one night with a girl I had been seeing briefly - very stupidly I ejaculated. I realised how stupid I had been and took her to a pharmacy to take the morning after pill 13 hours later. She did not come on at all for at least another 4 weeks so for 4 weeks I was freaking out - granted she has an irregular period, and she had also taken the morning after pill just two weeks before so I think it's possible that it messed up her cycle?

Anyway she took a blood pregnancy test 13 days after the second time she took the Morning after Pill which came out negative (we went to see a private doctor together).

According to her she did a home pregnancy test which came out negative, just under two weeks later. At this point I felt relieved and I was back to being able to focus at work etc.

However given the strain this had put on our relationship she decided to end it, 4 weeks after we had unprotected sex. And she removed me from Facebook and Skype.

I'm a bit of a worrier, so in early November (11 weeks after we had unprotected sex) I decided to phone her to ask her if she is pregnant. She was at work and she said no, told me to get a grip and said to never call her again.

Since then, as of today, it has been 3 and a half months since we had unprotected sex. She hasn't contacted me at all.

Realistically am I in the clear? Am I just being paranoid? I cannot stop kicking myself for being so stupid that night. I have definitely learned from this. I have had sex a couple of times since the incident (once with her and once with another girl) but each time I use a condom and I also pull out because I am so paranoid.

Appreciate your opinions guys. Thanks.
Yes, you are being very paranoid here.
Are you quite an anxious person in general.
Reply 2
Original post by Kabloomybuzz
Yes, you are being very paranoid here.
Are you quite an anxious person in general.


Thanks for the reply. I am indeed a very anxious person in general.

So you reckon I am in the all clear?
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks for the reply. I am indeed a very anxious person in general.

So you reckon I am in the all clear?


Yes, but I don't think thats going to stop you worrying is it?
May I suggest you see a doctor and seek treatment for your anxiety, as this really isn't healthy.
There's nothing necessarily wrong with not trusting condoms alone, but yes, this is an anxiety issue.
you just need to chill calm down it is natural to panic at such circumstances but don't get too paranoid you are just being anxious.
Yes you're being too paranoid :smile:. MAP, several negative tests, plus her word, should be enough :smile:.
Reply 7
Hi thought I'd give an update.

Unfortunately my paranoia hasn't subsided entirely.. doesn't help that work is really stressful too!

It is now exactly 21 weeks since the episode (or roughly 5 months) and I still haven't had any contact from her. I am thinking of going to where she works to have a good look at her and make sure once and for all that she isn't pregnant.

Given my friend's understanding of my anxiety issue, he went into her shop to have a good look at her last week (which works out at 4 and a half months since the episode of unprotected sex). He is 100% positive that there is no bump whatsoever.

Is that reason enough for me to stop panicking once and for all?

-She took the MAP within 13 hours after unprotected sex (95% effective within 24 hours supposedly)
-She did a blood pregnancy test 13 days after this episode which she says turned out negative. According to the private doctor 13 days after unprotected sex is "at the cusp" of detecting a pregnancy - so she would need to take a home pregnancy test in one weeks time.
-She claims she took a home pregnancy test twoweeks after which turned out negative.
-She decided to stop seeing me at this point. Removed me from Facebook and Skype.
-Two months after the episode I telephoned her to ask if she was pregnant. She said no, told me to get a grip and to never contact her again.
-It is now Five months since the episode. No contact since. My close friend had a very close look at her for me at the 20-week mark and says there is no belly at all.

Time to stop worrying?
Original post by Anonymous
Hi thought I'd give an update.

Unfortunately my paranoia hasn't subsided entirely.. doesn't help that work is really stressful too!

It is now exactly 21 weeks since the episode (or roughly 5 months) and I still haven't had any contact from her. I am thinking of going to where she works to have a good look at her and make sure once and for all that she isn't pregnant.

Given my friend's understanding of my anxiety issue, he went into her shop to have a good look at her last week (which works out at 4 and a half months since the episode of unprotected sex). He is 100% positive that there is no bump whatsoever.

Is that reason enough for me to stop panicking once and for all?

-She took the MAP within 13 hours after unprotected sex (95% effective within 24 hours supposedly)
-She did a blood pregnancy test 13 days after this episode which she says turned out negative. According to the private doctor 13 days after unprotected sex is "at the cusp" of detecting a pregnancy - so she would need to take a home pregnancy test in one weeks time.
-She claims she took a home pregnancy test twoweeks after which turned out negative.
-She decided to stop seeing me at this point. Removed me from Facebook and Skype.
-Two months after the episode I telephoned her to ask if she was pregnant. She said no, told me to get a grip and to never contact her again.
-It is now Five months since the episode. No contact since. My close friend had a very close look at her for me at the 20-week mark and says there is no belly at all.

Time to stop worrying?


Time to see a doctor about your anxiety issues, this seems to be taking over your life.

Logicaly, you know she isn't pregnant... going to see her at work, having your friends go see her, is borderline harrassment/stalking

Its like constantly picking at a scab and not letting the wound heal, by allowing yourself to keep checking up on her, you're validating your anxiety and probably making it worse. Leave it alone!!

The problem is not the (im)possibility that she's pregnant, its your anxiety and paranoia around the whole thing. Seek help.
Original post by Anonymous
-Two months after the episode I telephoned her to ask if she was pregnant. She said no, told me to get a grip and to never contact her again.


Time to stop worrying?


What Kabloomybuzz said! The only word I'd even quibble with is 'borderline': given what she's said, it would be harassment.
You need to leave her alone. She told you she isn't pregnant, she took a morning after pill in front of you and pregnancy tests have come back negative. If she catches you going into her workplace to check up on her she can get you done for harassment - I would urge you to see your GP for your anxiety as this isn't healthy.
Original post by SpicyStrawberry
You need to leave her alone. She told you she isn't pregnant, she took a morning after pill in front of you and pregnancy tests have come back negative. If she catches you going into her workplace to check up on her she can get you done for harassment - I would urge you to see your GP for your anxiety as this isn't healthy.


Appreciate the advice.

I have spoken to a doctor who recommended some 'habits' to help alleviate my anxiety (short of taking any sort of drugs or medicine). It has certainly helped and I am calmer now than I was this time last week. Hopefully it stays this way.

I definitely won't contact her, and I will not go to her. I'm dropping it. I'm now just focused on my work and professional qualification studies. The doctor reckons it's a combination of various stresses that had made my anxiety this bad (I have a highly stressful job in the city, I work very long hours, and on top of that I do a very difficult professional qualification which takes up most of what little spare time I have).

Appreciate the advice guys. The trip to the doctor certainly helped, at least a bit.
Original post by Anonymous
Appreciate the advice.

I have spoken to a doctor who recommended some 'habits' to help alleviate my anxiety (short of taking any sort of drugs or medicine). It has certainly helped and I am calmer now than I was this time last week. Hopefully it stays this way.

I definitely won't contact her, and I will not go to her. I'm dropping it. I'm now just focused on my work and professional qualification studies. The doctor reckons it's a combination of various stresses that had made my anxiety this bad (I have a highly stressful job in the city, I work very long hours, and on top of that I do a very difficult professional qualification which takes up most of what little spare time I have).

Appreciate the advice guys. The trip to the doctor certainly helped, at least a bit.


I'm glad to hear you're feeling less anxious, it is natural to feel concerned but if all the evidence says you shouldn't worry and you still feel you need to check up on it you did the right thing in seeking some advice from your doctor. All the best to you with your work and qualification, hope it all goes well for you :smile:
Yes id say you were being paranoid, if she was pregnant im sure she would have told you by now.. your probably annoying her by phoning her up asking if shes pregnant..
Original post by Anonymous
So basically back in September I had unprotected sex one night with a girl I had been seeing briefly - very stupidly I ejaculated. I realised how stupid I had been and took her to a pharmacy to take the morning after pill 13 hours later. She did not come on at all for at least another 4 weeks so for 4 weeks I was freaking out - granted she has an irregular period, and she had also taken the morning after pill just two weeks before so I think it's possible that it messed up her cycle?

Anyway she took a blood pregnancy test 13 days after the second time she took the Morning after Pill which came out negative (we went to see a private doctor together).

According to her she did a home pregnancy test which came out negative, just under two weeks later. At this point I felt relieved and I was back to being able to focus at work etc.

However given the strain this had put on our relationship she decided to end it, 4 weeks after we had unprotected sex. And she removed me from Facebook and Skype.

I'm a bit of a worrier, so in early November (11 weeks after we had unprotected sex) I decided to phone her to ask her if she is pregnant. She was at work and she said no, told me to get a grip and said to never call her again.

Since then, as of today, it has been 3 and a half months since we had unprotected sex. She hasn't contacted me at all.

Realistically am I in the clear? Am I just being paranoid? I cannot stop kicking myself for being so stupid that night. I have definitely learned from this. I have had sex a couple of times since the incident (once with her and once with another girl) but each time I use a condom and I also pull out because I am so paranoid.

Appreciate your opinions guys. Thanks.

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