The Student Room Group

Are friends real or are they only your friend to get something out of you?

You'll understand from my last thread why i feel like this.

o.k i got scared of losing yet another friend when the time came to us all leaving the company next week.

i felt us falling apart and i just couldnt bare talking to her all day for 2 days, i even left a week early and i told her all this on my mobile phone by text and she was ok with it but now she seems to be doing the "if i dont reply he will forget"

because she hasnt replied to me for 2 days, we had good times.

You see i actually miss people but is that the same for other people in this world because im starting to believe that people just pretend to be my friend as to not offend me. because no-one is texting me now.

I am scared of making new friends as i will always be thinking that they are trying to be my friend to gain popularity or that they may think that i am interesting.

I want them to be my friend because i am just a good person and that's all to begin with.
Reply 1
i dont know about anyone else, but i've got about five "best friends" - people i trust with anything and everything. and hundreds of other friends who i enjoy the company of, but who i wouldnt tell anything really important to. i think the bond i have with my best friends is one that will never break, but i couldn't say that about the rest. Just be yourself and you will find people that you "click" with, and you both will know when you do :smile:
xXx
Reply 2
littlenat01
i dont know about anyone else, but i've got about five "best friends" - people i trust with anything and everything. and hundreds of other friends who i enjoy the company of, but who i wouldnt tell anything really important to. i think the bond i have with my best friends is one that will never break, but i couldn't say that about the rest. Just be yourself and you will find people that you "click" with, and you both will know when you do :smile:
xXx

Yep, same as. I used to have a group of 4 friends but I then found out they were with me when it suited them. I still talk to them, but it's better knowing that I'm not being used that way.
I have 3 best friends who I would tell anything to, and who I know, that if I do something for them, they will always do something for me in the future. But, I also have lots of aqquaintances who I know are the exact opposite.
I get that all the time mate; people not replying to my texts. Most people at my school just wanted my help in lessons and stuff, didn't wanna know outside of school. Since we broke up and I left for uni I have only spoken to 5 of them. Shows who your friends really are if they don't even bother to reply to text messages.
Reply 4
Nah, my mates and I have been together for years, and we've been through so much with and for each other, and done so much stuff for each other that I have no doubts about the legitimacy of our friendships.
Reply 5
It's like my once best friend 1994-1999 and onwards he just stopped coming round and when my dad died last year he finally text me to see how i was and i said i want a friend not someone who just wants toknow if im ok, anyway i then went round and he said sorry and things like that, got his number and he said well keep in touch and he hasnt really bothered to come round.

I just lose all my trust because its happening again at work.
Reply 6
I usually find that people don't bother to contact me unless I contact them first.
Reply 7
I've got one friend- she's my best friend and I can tell her anything and trust her completely- I'm poor and stupid and so have got nothing to offer her!! But I don't just like her because she's the opposite AT ALL
Reply 8
I have about 6 "best friends", which sounds a lot, but with 5 of them I grew up in lower school with. The last one is a guy I've known about 3 years and we see each other practically every day. I then have about 4 other people who when I'm with, I get on extremely well with, but we don't really make an effort to see each other because we have very different lives and very different friends. There are random people I like, but meh they don't mean anything to me really. All my close friends are outside of 6th form for various reasons, which can sometimes make me sad that we are all so split up. People in school think I don't really have any close friends, when actually they're all outside of school, but hey what can you do? Life’s a bitch. I know that they are my "real" friends though because they love me (as I do them) and we have some of the best times together, and if that's convenience, then I dunno what real friendship is.

A guy who was in my “top 3” best friends has just randomly decided to stop talking to me, because he has all his new friends now and I was just there at the time to make him look good. That makes me depressed because I really liked him, and I could have talked for hours with him, but obviously that was meaningless to him. Still, I’ll get over it.
Reply 9
34 person
I have about 6 "best friends", which sounds a lot, but with 5 of them I grew up in lower school with. The last one is a guy I've known about 3 years and we see each other practically every day. I then have about 4 other people who when I'm with, I get on extremely well with, but we don't really make an effort to see each other because we have very different lives and very different friends. There are random people I like, but meh they don't mean anything to me really. All my close friends are outside of 6th form for various reasons, which can sometimes make me sad that we are all so split up. People in school think I don't really have any close friends, when actually they're all outside of school, but hey what can you do? Life’s a bitch. I know that they are my "real" friends though because they love me (as I do them) and we have some of the best times together, and if that's convenience, then I dunno what real friendship is.

A guy who was in my “top 3” best friends has just randomly decided to stop talking to me, because he has all his new friends now and I was just there at the time to make him look good. That makes me depressed because I really liked him, and I could have talked for hours with him, but obviously that was meaningless to him. Still, I’ll get over it.

I guess that's what it comes down to, that we have different lives:smile:
Reply 10
Guffy
Nah, my mates and I have been together for years, and we've been through so much with and for each other, and done so much stuff for each other that I have no doubts about the legitimacy of our friendships.


Same.

Which, considering that I'm a total bastard, makes me quite fortunate indeed.