Let's talk about hypergamy again

of course not, I'm grateful for the help. Nonetheless I do believe it is self-evident I am exhibiting Suzie's 'beta' traits which are actually omega since beta is more like Sensitive New Age Guy anyway. Am I not?

I'll agree my mind is a little distorted but only in that I'm obsessed about this which by definition suggests a great level of fear/anxiety and a lack of mental/emotional control over the area of life in question or other areas

Now would be a good time to tell you I might have Aspergers which would explain the way I think about these social norms, but I've been on a waiting list for 3 months. I was borderline on the test around Christmas so I don't know yet this may just be a product of the anxiety disorder

I'm not a psychiatrist, so I'm not diagnosing you but as someone who has studied a lot of psychology, that does indeed sound like a symptom of typical Aspergers. Though, like you said, it could also just be your anxiety which is more likely. So what is it exactly you think you're gaining from reading Suzie's criteria about beta and alpha males?

if put into application I'd probably be better in social situations, whether or not this translates as make more friends with women too I couldn't say but it seems probable. I would rather not have any than be the orbiter they talk **** about/laugh about behind their back

You're not being truthful to yourself or others if you assume an act you think is socially acceptable. In the long-run that's going to cause you to have more issues than you already do, because you're lying to yourself. You are allowed to pick your friends after all, they might be hard to come by but you need to pick people who accept you for who you are. Then all the other issues will fall into place and you won't need to have such anxious thoughts about whether they respect/love you or not.

this is the 'just be yourself' argument, but it is well reported that certain traits are abhorred by most well-rounded, confident and mature adults (e.g. laziness, attention-seeking, messing people about etc.)

You don't seem lazy to me, nor an attention-seeker so those attributes don't apply to you. Would you really rather act like someone else and attract people who only like your for that, or have a few close friends who accept you as you are?

You're focusing on this far too much and it is not going to do you any favours. First get the idea of Alpha Beta male out of your head, it does not nor ever will apply to humans (or indeed the vast majority of other primates). We are not dogs, our social systems are far more in depth and complicated partly due to our primate nature and the other part due to our sentience. You are not completely wrong and hypergamy to an extent does exist however you are making the mistake of vastly oversimplifying human beings to come up with a Alpha + Hypergamy = no girls for me type equation when in reality the world and human emotions in particular are so much more complicated. Women don't have a set list of criteria that makes one guy better than another (well some probably do but I'm talking about in general) and someone's perceived status in a society is in no way shape or form a reflection on how many women they are currently banging or the state of their marital affairs.

You seriously need to stop worrying about this because it will mess your head up if every time you talk to a pretty girl you're wondering when her hypergamy will kick in and she'll go screw a 80 year old billionaire, go to a club or join a dating site, get some healthy interaction with the opposite sex and that will help you a lot more than reading through those articles will.

Thank you, I guess you haven't seen enough of me yet to change your opinion.

I'd rather be the best version of myself which is not this. :/

You've clearly been spending too much time on the internet. Why not go out tomorrow? You might see some actual women, and believe me, most of them aren't the evil, conniving creatures the internet makes them out to be, in fact a lot of them are quite lovely people.

That's good but you need help being the best version of yourself. That's why in the meantime, as you wait for your place on the NHS to come through you shouldn't be making yourself worse by surfing the net for damaging content. I know it's not possible to just switch off your problems but you're feeding your issues unnecessarily. Have you tried to talking to Samaritans? You can email them or call them 24 hours a day.

Yes I've called Samaritans re: anxiety/depression in the past, don't think they'll understand with this. Closest I can think of is Relate and people here have said I'm top young and a specialist case for them so I'm in 2 minds about it now

Are you over or under 18? I think CBT would really help you. This is from the NHS' website: "Your GP can refer you for talking treatment that is free on the NHS. This will usually be a short course of counselling or CBT from the GP surgery's counselling service."

Perhaps you should try this and you will get someone to talk to in person, quicker.

I've had CBT the intensity and frequency of my obsessions and paranoia was considered too high profile for it alone so they referred me up to Step 4 Psychologies

I know this sounds extreme, but since your condition is severe, have you considered admitting yourself to a psych-ward? I doubt this will be necessary but it might be if you're getting worse and haven't responded to the other steps of treatment.

Yeah it's a bit extreme. Doc would laugh and up my meds like last time lol