Not making the most of University

A lot of my 'friends' last term were guys (I'm a girl), but after getting with/sleeping with a couple of them, their whole groups seems to feel uncomfortable around me which I feel is unfair. I have two good friends who I can basically always chill with and who 'get me' but theyre not friends so were not a group exactly.

Der is problem.

If this is what you go to Uni for, then you miss the whole point of uni.

Okay, yeh the point of uni is to study and gain a degree- something im finding hard to do without the social aspect. I'm a social person, therefore I need to have the social part of my in order to succeed in other parts of my life. Its how I relax, if I cant relax I cant work.

Theres nothing wrong with doing this, its how relationships start etc. and its something both parties wanted to do- why should it make me excluded from my friends and not the guy?

Make friends at societies.

Also what uni do you go to and what course are you doing?

How can u say theres nothing wrong with sleeping with a couple of guys who are in the same group ? Smh

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Theres nothing wrong with doing this, its how relationships start etc. and its something both parties wanted to do- why should it make me excluded from my friends and not the guy?

I study Geography and id rather not say which uni- its a pretty good uni, not amazing but nice for sure

Im trying out a bunch of societies this term, but isnt second term too late?

Its not pretty good. As for friends, you have to make the effort.

Talk to people in lectures/seminars. Its not too late for societies. Its always easier due to a common interest.

what do you mean 'its not pretty good'?
okay well yeh i will join some societies

I mean its lower than top 50.

Definitely don't drop out just because of the social aspect that is ridiculous.
You could move and it could be worse and then what? I'm assuming you chose your Uni for a reason so you will have to find ways of making it work for you.

So you've got two friends who 'get you' that's a good start. Can you suggest doing things together?

Also not to sound harsh because that is not my intention but if you need to learn to cope without close friends for a short while. There will probably come a time when you do meet some good friends at uni...and equally you may not. You have to just focus on Uni and the reason why you are there; continue to build up your friendships with the people you do talk to and take it from there.


People need to start learning to be comfortable with their own company and not relying on other people to make them feel 'complete'. Don't let your social life ruin you like this!

Try and find positives to make you feel better...did you do really well on an assignment? Are you proud of yourself for that? How can you improve next time? Try and occupy your time with other things and hopefully you won't feel so sad.

thanks so much for this- i just needed someone to be blunt me i think. i am over - thinking it a bit but it is getting to me everday and affecting my health.
as to the bit in bold- i totally agree with this but i just dont know how. i love being around people, even if were not talking or anything- it really relaxes me and i get pretty anxious/tense if left on my own. this has been the case all my life and i cant just change overnight- any advice?