Sleeping with my boyfriend didn't turn me on?
I've been with my boyfriend for just over a month now and I must admit, I expected sex to happen maybe after 3 months of being together. As I suspected before, I think I need to be 100% comfortable with another person in order to want to sleep with them.
Anyway, we attempted it a few nights ago and he was really into it but as soon as I was naked I felt quite uncomfortable. I didn't feel nearly as aroused as I expected so we stopped and I felt guilty but he was really understanding about it.
I'm just worried I might actually be asexual or something. I mean, when I masturbate by myself and think about someone doing it to me it turns me on. I just don't understand why I felt so uncomfortable and especially why it didn't do much for me.
Anyway, we attempted it a few nights ago and he was really into it but as soon as I was naked I felt quite uncomfortable. I didn't feel nearly as aroused as I expected so we stopped and I felt guilty but he was really understanding about it.
I'm just worried I might actually be asexual or something. I mean, when I masturbate by myself and think about someone doing it to me it turns me on. I just don't understand why I felt so uncomfortable and especially why it didn't do much for me.
Original post by Anonymous
I've been with my boyfriend for just over a month now and I must admit, I expected sex to happen maybe after 3 months of being together. As I suspected before, I think I need to be 100% comfortable with another person in order to want to sleep with them.
I think you've sort of answered your own problem here. Maybe you didn't feel pressured into it, but it seems like it happened too soon for you. Not enjoying it or wanting to carry on makes total sense in that situation. It's nice he was understanding.
As someone who also needs to be very comfortable before they could even consider having sex, I've also thought I might be asexual. But for some people enjoying sex is a matter of trusting and comfort around another person and that takes time.
Maybe it just hasn't been long enough and so because you don't feel fully comfortable with him you're finding it difficult. Maybe you need more of an emotional connection first. You might want to work on that as well as maybe taking it down a notch and then gradually moving back to sleeping with him again.
There are 2 possible reasons: most likely you're asexual, a lot of girls are asexual and aren't interested in sex. Or maybe you're not attracted to him at all.
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Original post by Icebaker
There are 2 possible reasons: most likely you're asexual, a lot of girls are asexual and aren't interested in sex. Or maybe you're not attracted to him at all.
Posted from TSR Mobile
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A lot of girls are what? We aren't interested in what?!
Wow.
You are so confused it's sad.
Don't confuse 'a lot of girls aren't interested in sex' with 'a lot of girls aren't interested in sex with me', and then decide that that means a lot of us are asexual. Asexual people make up a very small percentage of the population, you cannot say that a lot of girls are so.
Agree with Lwin personally, OP, you won't feel all that in the mood if you are uncomfortable.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I've been with my boyfriend for just over a month now and I must admit, I expected sex to happen maybe after 3 months of being together. As I suspected before, I think I need to be 100% comfortable with another person in order to want to sleep with them.
Anyway, we attempted it a few nights ago and he was really into it but as soon as I was naked I felt quite uncomfortable. I didn't feel nearly as aroused as I expected so we stopped and I felt guilty but he was really understanding about it.
I'm just worried I might actually be asexual or something. I mean, when I masturbate by myself and think about someone doing it to me it turns me on. I just don't understand why I felt so uncomfortable and especially why it didn't do much for me.
Anyway, we attempted it a few nights ago and he was really into it but as soon as I was naked I felt quite uncomfortable. I didn't feel nearly as aroused as I expected so we stopped and I felt guilty but he was really understanding about it.
I'm just worried I might actually be asexual or something. I mean, when I masturbate by myself and think about someone doing it to me it turns me on. I just don't understand why I felt so uncomfortable and especially why it didn't do much for me.
Wait and date, until you feel that you want it. I hope you don't organize when these things are going to happen.
IF that doesn't work, then you need to sit him down on a chair and lap dance darling, take sex slowly. Enjoy
If you're not comfortable you're not gonna enjoy it. If you don't feel ready then don't have sex. I'm the same in that I prefer to get to know someone before sleeping with them otherwise I feel awkward (unless I'm hammered).
Original post by porn induced coma
A lot of girls are what? We aren't interested in what?!
Wow.
You are so confused it's sad.
Don't confuse 'a lot of girls aren't interested in sex' with 'a lot of girls aren't interested in sex with me', and then decide that that means a lot of us are asexual. Asexual people make up a very small percentage of the population, you cannot say that a lot of girls are so.
Agree with Lwin personally, OP, you won't feel all that in the mood if you are uncomfortable.
Wow.
You are so confused it's sad.
Don't confuse 'a lot of girls aren't interested in sex' with 'a lot of girls aren't interested in sex with me', and then decide that that means a lot of us are asexual. Asexual people make up a very small percentage of the population, you cannot say that a lot of girls are so.
Agree with Lwin personally, OP, you won't feel all that in the mood if you are uncomfortable.
This.
Also, to op, consider you might just not be attracted to him. I see plenty of women who I see and think 'they're attractive' but I have absolutely no desire to have sex with them. Then I see women who aren't as attractive but I see them and immediately I know I want to have sex with them. You can't control this so don't feel bad.
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