Should I tell her she is being cheated on?
So there is a girl at my university whose boyfriend is seeing other women as well. Do I have an obligation to tell her or should I just allow the situation to resolve itself. He seems like a nice enough person, so would it be interfering of me to tell her?
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Original post by armbar
So there is a girl at my university whose boyfriend is seeing other women as well. Do I have an obligation to tell her or should I just allow the situation to resolve itself. He seems like a nice enough person, so would it be interfering of me to tell her?
Worst case scenario: he denies it, she believes him, both of them suddenly have some kind of a vendetta against you. Totally not worth it.
Original post by Jooooshy
Worst case scenario: he denies it, she believes him, both of them suddenly have some kind of a vendetta against you. Totally not worth it.
Good point. I do have evidence but it is probably not my fight.
How sure are you that they're boyfriend and girlfriend? Even though you don't see it often, they might be in an open relationship?
Just send an "anonymous" note saying he's seeing other people and she'll either take it from there or ignore it
Just send an "anonymous" note saying he's seeing other people and she'll either take it from there or ignore it
Original post by Loafing.Charizard
How sure are you that they're boyfriend and girlfriend? Even though you don't see it often, they might be in an open relationship?
Just send an "anonymous" note saying he's seeing other people and she'll either take it from there or ignore it
Just send an "anonymous" note saying he's seeing other people and she'll either take it from there or ignore it
An anonymous note could work well I guess?
I would probably tell a friend, but only one I know who trusts me. I would just say what I saw and nothing more.
Original post by armbar
So there is a girl at my university whose boyfriend is seeing other women as well. Do I have an obligation to tell her or should I just allow the situation to resolve itself. He seems like a nice enough person, so would it be interfering of me to tell her?
Only if the girl is a good friend of yours. Otherwise, it's not your business to interfere with someone elses relationship.
bro ****ing code.
what is wrong with you man
what is wrong with you man
Original post by Loafing.Charizard
How sure are you that they're boyfriend and girlfriend? Even though you don't see it often, they might be in an open relationship?
Just send an "anonymous" note saying he's seeing other people and she'll either take it from there or ignore it
Just send an "anonymous" note saying he's seeing other people and she'll either take it from there or ignore it
This seems the best option to me. The only thing is she may not believe an anon message and just believe someones trying to mess her about. These situations are so difficult though, sometimes they are just best left alone.
So what if he is seeing other women? He has every right to do what he wants, no one can tell him what to do. All relationships are open as far as the man is concerned. Just because he's with someone, it doesn't mean he can't have sex with other girls. It's not like he's married for goodness sake, then it would be a different story.
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Original post by armbar
Good point. I do have evidence but it is probably not my fight.
It's really hard, because my instinct is to say leave it, but when it comes to the theoretical morality of it, there are other (slightly more serious) circumstances where it's important for strangers to stand up against injustices that don't directly concern them.
If you really want to do it right, I would say speak to the boyfriend first. This puts you at risk, because he then knows you know, but that's the approach I would personally take.
I think you should stay out of their matter because even if you are being sincere by trying to help, you'll end up creating trouble. No worries since the truth has always a way of coming out. Honestly, I'll only tell the girl that her bf is cheating on her if she is someone very close to me and not just any other person.
Original post by Cutty
So what if he is seeing other women? He has every right to do what he wants, no one can tell him what to do. All relationships are open as far as the man is concerned. Just because he's with someone, it doesn't mean he can't have sex with other girls. It's not like he's married for goodness sake, then it would be a different story.
Fine if the girl has agreed to an open relationship, but lying is not ok. I'm sure it happens, but it's not morally justified. The girl has a right to know and decide whether she wants to be with someone who is sleeping around and potentially risking her health with STDs.
"Nobody can tell him what to do" - well sure, lets let everyone do whatever they want.
He has a right to sleep around - it's not illegal - but the girl has a right to leave him because of it.
(edited 9 years ago)
How reliable is your evidence?
Do the right thing: don't ruin the guy's hook up.
Original post by armbar
So there is a girl at my university whose boyfriend is seeing other women as well. Do I have an obligation to tell her or should I just allow the situation to resolve itself. He seems like a nice enough person, so would it be interfering of me to tell her?
No one else interested in how this turned out? Would be interesting to know what you did in the end!
Original post by matthewduncan
bro ****ing code.
what is wrong with you man
what is wrong with you man
As a male speaking, could you other guys stfu about "bro codes" and "alpha-dom"? Guys just use those as an excuse to be dicks.
OP, if you don't know them well, leave it be. If the girl is your friend, then tell her.
Original post by Inglisred
As a male speaking, could you other guys stfu about "bro codes" and "alpha-dom"? Guys just use those as an excuse to be dicks.
OP, if you don't know them well, leave it be. If the girl is your friend, then tell her.
OP, if you don't know them well, leave it be. If the girl is your friend, then tell her.
bruv there are rules to this game.
If its your blood then fair enough but i cant condone telling non relatives
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