So I've been with my girlfriend for just under 3 years. We are both at university studying physics. I have been under immense pressure as of early November to redo a failed report. The repercussions of me failing again, after a three month deadline, mean I would have to leave my course. In the past I have had problems with my supervisors and it came to light previously that they had wanted to get rid of me and that this would be the only opportunity for them to do so. Hence the considerable pressure I was under. Despite this I made sure to spend time with my gf at least 1/2 times a week, although not always quality time.
When it came to Christmas we did spend a lot more time together for Christmas shopping and to see the lights etc. But i was always a little on edge I guess due to having work on my mind. In a normal situation we spend at least one day a weekend together, though during this period I wanted to focus fully on my report in order to ensure a pass and so we didn't spend any time together over the weekends.
Come New Year and having spent a little more time with her though not much more than recent weeks I agreed to spend a Sunday with her but on the condition we could spend it studying at her university. In the past we have done this when one of us has studying to do. Normally my gf spends her time in labs and when I come to her university to do work I sit in a computer room and wait for her. When there I can't go to the toilet as I don't have access cards to leave and enter the computer rooms.
Come the following Sunday we were on the phone in the morning to organise what time we meet at her uni. I wanted to check that she would be spending time with me and not in lab seeing as she was only coming to spend time with me. She said she would come but that she would be in the labs as she couldn't do work unless she was in labs. I said I would go to my uni then and work there where I have my own computer, desk, drawers, kitchen, books/papers, food, access to toilet and other amenities, none of which I have at hers. She then started moaning about how I promised to spend time at her university. I said there's no point if she was going to be in labs. We debated this til I agreed to go to hers and she agreed to not be in the labs.
So later we get to her university, bear in mind this is now fast approaching the deadline for my last chance report. We enter her open plan office and there were some undergraduates working a few desks over from us. I started chatting as we got in and she told me to shush as people were working. So we sat down and did some work. She decided to put her headphones in and listen to music. As a result I definitely couldn't talk to her. On the few occasions I did try to talk or mess around a little she told me off for disturbing her and to let her work (bear in mind she only came to uni to spend time with me). The only times I could disturb her was to ask for her card so I could use the toilet.
Hours later when we were leaving I suggested we go for a little walk, seeing as we hadn't been going for our walks for a few months. A few minutes after leaving she realised she had forgotten her phone, something that frequently happens due to her being disorganised, something I have mentioned to her before. This time I made sure to just make a light joke about it and not moan. So we went back to her uni and I waited outside for her in the rain and cold. Once finding it we went on our way and had a little walk. My intentions were to go for a walk then go home and I'd do some studying.
As we were walking I realised I didn't have my watch on, I assumed I left it at home. After walking for about 30/40 minutes, it now being 8pmish, I suggested we go for a meal. After 2 hours and an expensive but worthy meal (I paid) we made our way home.
The next morning I realised I couldn't find my watch and that I may have left it at her uni. I texted her about 10.40am while she was on her way in, to check for my watch once she was in. I hoped that she would as she arrived as the toilets are about 20 metres from her seat. About 11.05 she texted me to say it was not on her desk, I texted back to ask if she had checked the toilets (not herself but asking someone to check for her). She replied that she hadn't, I texted back to ask why she hadn't done so yet, thinking someone would have the opportunity to find and take the watch.
She replied to me about 15minutes later to say she would check the lost property soon, I again asked if she had checked the toilets, she replied and said no and asked if I realised that she had work to do. At this point I got very angry thinking she was avoiding asking someone to check the toilets, as in general she doesn't like asking people things. In my anger I asked if she was purposely being stupid and wanted my watch to be lost. Again she replied that she would check the lost property soon. At this point I totally lost it and sent some angry messages to her about how she owed it to me to find my watch after all I did last night, to which she did not reply. Few hours later she texted me to say the watch was not in the lost property. At this point I had calmed down but decided to ignore her as the watch was clearly gone by now.
We ended up not speaking for about 5 days (she tried calling me that night but I ignored her) and didn't see each other for 2.5 weeks, largely down to my work. When we spoke about it she advised me the reason she didn't check the toilets first is because they are cleaned at 6am normally and so she expected the watch to be handed in to lost property. Then she informed me that she had a deadline for some work that morning, but I didn't really care about that as I expected her to check the toilets first thing, even if she assumed they would be cleaned. I have let her know that in a relationship I would expect my partner to go out of her way in such a situation, which I believe she did not. I have also said that even if I wasn't her bf, as a person who went out of his way for her that night, she owed me. She disagrees. We have both calmed down since and I have forgiven her but occasionally it comes up and she still believes I am wrong in expecting her to stop what she is doing a help, and she says her girls agree with her and I was overreacting.
Hence, my question to you all is, who is correct in their expectations? Sorry for the long text!