The Student Room Group

Help me get over him?

So...I fell for my best friend and sat on my feelings for around 2 months. Eventually I summoned up the courage to tell him but it wasn't mutual. He let me down in the most gentle way possible and I really thought I was going to be okay as it hurt but wasn't too bad.

Yesterday, it hit me like a runaway train. He's best friends with a few girls in the year and one of them has been going through a really tough him. They were sat right in my line of gaze and watching her put her head on his shoulder and him comforting her (when I knew he wouldn't do that for me in public) felt like a knife to the heart. I couldn't concentrate and ended up having to skip the next lecture because I was in tears. For the rest of the day I felt really down and teary and just didn't know what to do. My appetite has vanished and I feel sick this morning. I've just overcome about of depression so really would not like to end up back there...

How can I get over him and still be best friends? My friends say I will but it will take time. I'm so confused and hurt at the moment...We are supposed to be going out for a fun day on Wednesday and one friend says I should cancel (as it's too soon), but the other says I should go and clear the air with him. I have no idea what to do...

Please help me :frown:
Reply 1
I'm afraid it will take time - concentrate on a new interest and spend more time with your other friends. Avoid him


Posted from TSR Mobile
I agree with m93. Eventhough he's your best friend you need to cut him out for a while otherwise the feelings you have won't go, treat it as if it's a break-up. Get more involved in your work/job/hobbies and spend more time with your other friends, it'll take a while and some days will be harder than others but just keep busy and know your not the only person to ever feel this way.
Original post by Anonymous
So...I fell for my best friend and sat on my feelings for around 2 months. Eventually I summoned up the courage to tell him but it wasn't mutual. He let me down in the most gentle way possible and I really thought I was going to be okay as it hurt but wasn't too bad.

Yesterday, it hit me like a runaway train. He's best friends with a few girls in the year and one of them has been going through a really tough him. They were sat right in my line of gaze and watching her put her head on his shoulder and him comforting her (when I knew he wouldn't do that for me in public) felt like a knife to the heart. I couldn't concentrate and ended up having to skip the next lecture because I was in tears. For the rest of the day I felt really down and teary and just didn't know what to do. My appetite has vanished and I feel sick this morning. I've just overcome about of depression so really would not like to end up back there...

How can I get over him and still be best friends? My friends say I will but it will take time. I'm so confused and hurt at the moment...We are supposed to be going out for a fun day on Wednesday and one friend says I should cancel (as it's too soon), but the other says I should go and clear the air with him. I have no idea what to do...

Please help me :frown:


You should really take as long as it takes to just let out your emotions and just back off from him for a few days/weeks/however long it takes. You could just be alone for a bit doing things you like, hang out with a few friends and stuff.

It's really hard to just be good friends when one of you wants more out of it. The worst thing to do would be to try and 'forget about it' and carry on as normal for the next while - you might find that you're not ready/not over him and things'll just rush back and ahh.. it's a mess. Just give it some time and see how you feel.

Totally get how you feel. :console:
You will get over it, don't worry. When I was younger and had just met my now best friend I had feelings for him. He didn't feel the same, I was upset and I couldn't see myself talking to him again. So I distanced myself for a while (not sure how long) but gradually we became close again and now we are best friends. We never talk about it and it never crosses my mind (except when I read posts like this of course). Just take all the time you need.

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending