I have not attended 95% of my lectures during University, ask me anything.
The reason I am making this thread is because I would like others to avoid the mistakes I have made and I would also like to gain some perspective on myself. I am definitely not making this thread because I am proud.
I'm in my first year studying social science degree at a top 10 uni. The first couple of months went swell, I attended most if not all my lectures and was having a good social life, speaking a lot with girls, etc. I'd say it fell apart during November last year, started getting symptoms of social anxiety and depression, which gradually got worse during the year. Generally dropped out all of my societies, stopped going to the gym and ceased to socialize with people.
At this point in time, I have not attended a single lecture since November 2014. I make it to about 1/3 my seminars, which has recorded attendance.
I learn exclusively all the material generally through my books and online material such as YouTube. I generally do not read through the lecture slides because they're too brief for me to understand. As of current, I have an average of 55% over all my modules, however I have a gut feeling that I won't make it to the 40% threshold needed to go onto the second year. I have been receiving emails from the University but I just generally ignored them until I they made me attend a meeting, in which I explained my situation.
Looking at it objectively, I rationalize my poor attendance everyday and convince myself not to go. It is a vicious cycle, I do not go to lectures because I feel like I've made no friends on the course. I do not have friends on the course because I do not go to the lectures. At the lowest point, I could not even go to the kitchen to cook and I generally just stayed in my room 24/7. To tell you how bad it had gotten, I planned my online groceries so that I had non perishable foods that could last me through a week without going to the kitchen. I would never make any noise in my room for fear of flat mates knowing I was in my room. Every term I would tell myself that I would improve myself, it just never happened. To make matters worse, instead of opting to share a house with some mates, I convinced myself to sign a contract for a studio accommodation so that I could live by myself in peace, however I cannot afford it.
I am going back in 3 weeks, quite honestly I am extremely scared to go back. If I could go back in time, would I still go to University? Definitely not. I definitely believe I am not cut out for it, I got by during A-levels, but I'd be lucky to graduate with a third if I'm honest.
So there you have it. Ask me anything or give me any advice you want.
I'm in my first year studying social science degree at a top 10 uni. The first couple of months went swell, I attended most if not all my lectures and was having a good social life, speaking a lot with girls, etc. I'd say it fell apart during November last year, started getting symptoms of social anxiety and depression, which gradually got worse during the year. Generally dropped out all of my societies, stopped going to the gym and ceased to socialize with people.
At this point in time, I have not attended a single lecture since November 2014. I make it to about 1/3 my seminars, which has recorded attendance.
I learn exclusively all the material generally through my books and online material such as YouTube. I generally do not read through the lecture slides because they're too brief for me to understand. As of current, I have an average of 55% over all my modules, however I have a gut feeling that I won't make it to the 40% threshold needed to go onto the second year. I have been receiving emails from the University but I just generally ignored them until I they made me attend a meeting, in which I explained my situation.
Looking at it objectively, I rationalize my poor attendance everyday and convince myself not to go. It is a vicious cycle, I do not go to lectures because I feel like I've made no friends on the course. I do not have friends on the course because I do not go to the lectures. At the lowest point, I could not even go to the kitchen to cook and I generally just stayed in my room 24/7. To tell you how bad it had gotten, I planned my online groceries so that I had non perishable foods that could last me through a week without going to the kitchen. I would never make any noise in my room for fear of flat mates knowing I was in my room. Every term I would tell myself that I would improve myself, it just never happened. To make matters worse, instead of opting to share a house with some mates, I convinced myself to sign a contract for a studio accommodation so that I could live by myself in peace, however I cannot afford it.
I am going back in 3 weeks, quite honestly I am extremely scared to go back. If I could go back in time, would I still go to University? Definitely not. I definitely believe I am not cut out for it, I got by during A-levels, but I'd be lucky to graduate with a third if I'm honest.
So there you have it. Ask me anything or give me any advice you want.
(edited 9 years ago)
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Sounds like you don't enjoy your course,
Have you thought about preparing yourself over the next three weeks, so when you do go back you feel confident in regards to what the lectures are teaching you.
**** what the rest of the course thinks about you, get there early sit at the back avoid the uni dicks.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Have you thought about preparing yourself over the next three weeks, so when you do go back you feel confident in regards to what the lectures are teaching you.
**** what the rest of the course thinks about you, get there early sit at the back avoid the uni dicks.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by vela1
Did anything happen that maybe caused your depression?
I guess it's a plethora of reasons
- Lack of friends
- University gym was lackluster and the community there was bad. Generally avoided even my favorite hobby, lifting weights.
- A few social blunders earlier on in the year that I personally couldn't get past
- Some issues going on back at home
There are probably a lot more than I cannot think of from the top of my head, but I guess it all adds up.
I have seen a GP and received mediation, but I never rescheduled an appointment because I didn't like how the medication was affecting me.
Original post by sufferin succotash
Sounds like you don't enjoy your course,
Have you thought about preparing yourself over the next three weeks, so when you do go back you feel confident in regards to what the lectures are teaching you.
**** what the rest of the course thinks about you, get there early sit at the back avoid the uni dicks.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Have you thought about preparing yourself over the next three weeks, so when you do go back you feel confident in regards to what the lectures are teaching you.
**** what the rest of the course thinks about you, get there early sit at the back avoid the uni dicks.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Thank you man.
I do not personally have anything against anyone on my course or in my flat, everything that's going wrong is generally on me.
If I was being honest with you, I wish I could say I was doing what you said. Instead I am edging towards only going back to finish my tests and exams and that's it.
You're at University which you're paying **** loads of money for and you can't even be bothered to make it to your lectures and seminars? Why don't you just drop out? You obviously don't want to be there.
I've suffered with depression and know exactly what it's like to not have the willpower to get up in the morning, let alone leave your room and go to lectures, but there's no point continuing if you can't put 100% into your degree. You're better off dropping out and reapplying again when you're in a better position to do so.
Any ideas as to what caused this sudden change? Seems like everything was going perfect?
I've suffered with depression and know exactly what it's like to not have the willpower to get up in the morning, let alone leave your room and go to lectures, but there's no point continuing if you can't put 100% into your degree. You're better off dropping out and reapplying again when you're in a better position to do so.
Any ideas as to what caused this sudden change? Seems like everything was going perfect?
Original post by soanonymous
You're at University which you're paying **** loads of money for and you can't even be bothered to make it to your lectures and seminars? Why don't you just drop out? You obviously don't want to be there.
I've suffered with depression and know exactly what it's like to not have the willpower to get up in the morning, let alone leave your room and go to lectures, but there's no point continuing if you can't put 100% into your degree. You're better off dropping out and reapplying again when you're in a better position to do so.
Any ideas as to what caused this sudden change? Seems like everything was going perfect?
I've suffered with depression and know exactly what it's like to not have the willpower to get up in the morning, let alone leave your room and go to lectures, but there's no point continuing if you can't put 100% into your degree. You're better off dropping out and reapplying again when you're in a better position to do so.
Any ideas as to what caused this sudden change? Seems like everything was going perfect?
You're 100% right, I wish I had the guts to drop out.
I have not done so already for the following reasons.
- I know that I will not reapply to University if I drop out, ever.
- I lack any sort of skills or anything commendable that would allow me to find any type of decent job or apprenticeship if I do drop out. This degree is something I have to get no matter what, I'm scared of my own future if I don't manage to get it. I feel like I have reached the point of no return.
- I'm holding onto the hope that my situation will improve with time.
- A lot of pressure from my family. I do not want to disappoint them. They do not know that anything is going wrong, I generally don't want that to change.
Really sorry to hear about your situation, I'm sure it's incredibly difficult but try to stay positive and I hope everything works out in the end.
Have you always been slightly unstable in regards to anxiety and depression, or did it entirely come about during university? During sixth form, could you have imagined yourself possibly being in the situation you are now?
Have you always been slightly unstable in regards to anxiety and depression, or did it entirely come about during university? During sixth form, could you have imagined yourself possibly being in the situation you are now?
I miss around 95% of mine too (probably higher thinking about it) and generally do very well in my exams.
Missing lectures is the smart choice.
Missing lectures is the smart choice.
Original post by anonlad
Really sorry to hear about your situation, I'm sure it's incredibly difficult but try to stay positive and I hope everything works out in the end.
Have you always been slightly unstable in regards to anxiety and depression, or did it entirely come about during university? During sixth form, could you have imagined yourself possibly being in the situation you are now?
Have you always been slightly unstable in regards to anxiety and depression, or did it entirely come about during university? During sixth form, could you have imagined yourself possibly being in the situation you are now?
Thank you, hopefully it will!
I probably always had some symptoms, but it really shined through for me when I had to live with other people 24/7.
Never during any of my time in 6th sixth form did I think I would end up like this. I pictured it as a new beginning to make new friends and start afresh, I envisioned myself attending every single lecture, getting to know my lecturer and been a pivotal part of some society I enjoyed taking part in.
Original post by minor bun engine
I miss around 95% of mine too (probably higher thinking about it) and generally do very well in my exams.
Missing lectures is the smart choice.
Missing lectures is the smart choice.
The problem with missing lectures is that you miss important announcements, exclusive answers to certain set questions and general exam advice.
It's ironic that it is coming from me, but I guess we have different reasons for poor attendance.
Original post by kibbium
I'm in my first year studying social science degree at a top 10 uni.
I'm in my first year studying social science degree at a top 10 uni.
Which university are you currently studying at?
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by kibbium
I guess it's a plethora of reasons
- Lack of friends
- University gym was lackluster and the community there was bad. Generally avoided even my favorite hobby, lifting weights.
- A few social blunders earlier on in the year that I personally couldn't get past
- Some issues going on back at home
There are probably a lot more than I cannot think of from the top of my head, but I guess it all adds up.
I have seen a GP and received mediation, but I never rescheduled an appointment because I didn't like how the medication was affecting me.
- Lack of friends
- University gym was lackluster and the community there was bad. Generally avoided even my favorite hobby, lifting weights.
- A few social blunders earlier on in the year that I personally couldn't get past
- Some issues going on back at home
There are probably a lot more than I cannot think of from the top of my head, but I guess it all adds up.
I have seen a GP and received mediation, but I never rescheduled an appointment because I didn't like how the medication was affecting me.
Surely there are other gyms in the area that you can join?
Original post by BenLynch9
Surely there are other gyms in the area that you can join?
Yes there was, but part of the problem of having some form of social anxiety is that I could never bring myself to take the bus journey to go. Crowded buses are a thing I make a point to avoid.
I go and lift at 7am when it is usually empty but my sleep schedule was never the best, so it didn't happen a lot. Next year I will fix my sleep schedule and make sure to get every session in hopefully.
Original post by Raymat
Which university are you currently studying at?
Sorry, I have been vague on purpose. It is up north, in quite a student based city.
Original post by kibbium
Sorry, I have been vague on purpose. It is up north, in quite a student based city.
It is either Durham or St Andrews, am I right?
Original post by kibbium
Yes there was, but part of the problem of having some form of social anxiety is that I could never bring myself to take the bus journey to go. Crowded buses are a thing I make a point to avoid.
I go and lift at 7am when it is usually empty but my sleep schedule was never the best, so it didn't happen a lot. Next year I will fix my sleep schedule and make sure to get every session in hopefully.
I go and lift at 7am when it is usually empty but my sleep schedule was never the best, so it didn't happen a lot. Next year I will fix my sleep schedule and make sure to get every session in hopefully.
I appreciate you may have social anxiety but it sounds like you're making a lot of excuses. If you really wanted to go to the gym at 7, you could.
Original post by BenLynch9
I appreciate you may have social anxiety but it sounds like you're making a lot of excuses. If you really wanted to go to the gym at 7, you could.
You're right, which is why I will strive to improve myself in the future. I have, and do go to lift a lot in the mornings, but I am trying to do it more.
Overall, it's just a minor thing that has contributed to a larger problem since I haven't been able to focus on something I have enjoyed in the past.
How i wished i had suffered depression if i went to uni but no, i suffered depression during college. It's my third attempt i'm doing in a poor effort to make it into uni this year and i have poor attendance as well. I understand this situation OP very well, sadly It's difficult to stop it.
I wouldn't mind, if i end up going to uni, being alone. Because if i dont make any friends or im not popular, i will stay in my room 24/7 and do my shopping at 1am and not come out until 2am. It may be madness but that would be a good coping mechanism. I think your doing everything right by coping
I wouldn't mind, if i end up going to uni, being alone. Because if i dont make any friends or im not popular, i will stay in my room 24/7 and do my shopping at 1am and not come out until 2am. It may be madness but that would be a good coping mechanism. I think your doing everything right by coping
Original post by O.Ozz
How i wished i had suffered depression if i went to uni but no, i suffered depression during college. It's my third attempt i'm doing in a poor effort to make it into uni this year and i have poor attendance as well. I understand this situation OP very well, sadly It's difficult to stop it.
I wouldn't mind, if i end up going to uni, being alone. Because if i dont make any friends or im not popular, i will stay in my room 24/7 and do my shopping at 1am and not come out until 2am. It may be madness but that would be a good coping mechanism. I think your doing everything right by coping
I wouldn't mind, if i end up going to uni, being alone. Because if i dont make any friends or im not popular, i will stay in my room 24/7 and do my shopping at 1am and not come out until 2am. It may be madness but that would be a good coping mechanism. I think your doing everything right by coping
As someone whom has lived that lifestyle, it isn't something you want to get yourself into, trust me. Perhaps it sounds appealing to you to an extent, living an individual and somewhat secluded lifestyle at University, but it's draining, I don't care who you are. Don't willingly put yourself into that situation so easily. It also leads to bad habits in other areas of your life, particularly work and studying.
(edited 9 years ago)
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