The Student Room Group

I keep attracting garbage people in my life

I was supposed to meet up with a dude i used to work with to hang out in town. I arranged to meet at 4 and he was okay with it. At quarter to 5, he calls me up saying that he's hungover and was sleeping and if i could wait for 30 minutes to come into town so we can hang out as planned.

I just hung up the phone and went about my business (bought a nice pair of jeans). Strange thing is that I had a string instinct he would bail as he'd done so before last year and his excuse was also napping because he was tired lol.

He deleted me off Facebook ages ago so I don't even know why i keep bothering with people like this. Same thing happened with a girl that also worked at the same place. I arranged to meet up with her and she turns up nearly 3 hours late. Again, i ask to meet and she responds with if i'm not doing anything which is basically saying "if i have nothing better to do than hang out with you Mr Anonymous then yeah i will"

How can i stop being attracted and pursuing losers who always abandon and let me down??
errm how about you dont hang out with these people, nothing worse than someone desperate for company
Stop meeting guys from clubs
Reply 3
Original post by bittr n swt
Stop meeting guys from clubs


Lolwut? I'm a heterosexual male and we used to work together.
garbage people attract garbage people. Just an idea :rolleyes:
Reply 5
Original post by Hatsune Miku
garbage people attract garbage people. Just an idea :rolleyes:


I'm hardly garbage for inviting someone out am I? People should respectfully decline if they aren't at all interested or at least have the courtesy to let me know if they can't make it or they're going to be late.
Reply 6
I've met these type of people OP; don't waste your time with them.
Reply 7
Original post by studentLynch
errm how about you dont hang out with these people, nothing worse than someone desperate for company


How am I desperate for company? I am sorta lonely and depressed.
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
How am I desperate for company? I am sorta lonely and depressed.


Ignore these terrible people. You can't answer a problem like this with arrogant 'suck it up' logic.

You have to see it this way: YOU ARE WHAT YOU DO. What do you do? Do you put as much work as possible into understanding yourself, figuring out what you want, researching and pursuing ways of experiencing as much as you can, feeling and knowing as much as is possible for you, growing and finding the things that make you love them for their own sake, and not just for what they do for your image?

If you live in a state of subsistence - a 9-5 job you do mostly for the money, weekends spent on tv, your laptop or hitting up clubs, doing the most basic average sh-t everyone else around you is doing, and trying to find satisfaction and fulfilment from this narrow dead roundabout of experiences and people? Then you will attract garbage people.

You are what you do. You are your job, and how you spend your weekends, and what you love.

If you do everything you can to change those things - and I'm talking not just going for a couple of hipster holidays, going on a dating site or picking up guitar - I mean doing the research, exploring every possibility of life for yourself and then working very very hard to get to it - the people will definitely stop being garbage and start being...real people, who excite you and transform you and love you.

People don't understand this about insecurity, self-esteem issues, relationship issues, mental issues - instead of working on these things themselves, work on your life AS A WHOLE. In every aspect, from becoming extremely healthy, mobile, driven, experimental, intelligent, learned, passionate - which is achievable for anyone in a first world country with effort. You have the wealth of human knowledge and possibility at your fingertips, and presumably most of your life ahead of you. You're not deformed, or diseased, or traumatised.

You are just a series of thousands of tiny habits that combine to create you. Change your habits and you will change yourself.

It starts with research. Every possible bit of information on how to create a life you love is available. Do as much research as you can stand. Then start to form a plan that directly changes all your habits. No need to get spiritual, just change what you do every day and all the rest will follow.

Otherwise you will stay on the average, materialistic, helpless roundabout so many people are on. And it will stay garbage, no matter how many times you try to meet up with people from work and get the right girl and have fun. If you're doing these things on the same roundabout, you'll just keep picking up the same people and going to the same places. It'll never change. You have to change first.

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