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Is it ok for men to cry?

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Original post by anosmianAcrimony
It's only a loss of control if you were trying to to cry in the first place. In many scenarios, crying can be very therapeutic and you might not want to control yourself. If you choose to cry, and are not somehow overpowered by it, is it still a weakness?


Is your first sentence missing a 'not' somewhere?
Reply 41
I don't cry, it was pretty much knocked out of me since I was a kid (not literally). It's just something you didn't do as a male.
Reply 42
Yes its ok for them to cry, they have a heart and they have feelings. They have the right to express their feelings and emotions.
Reply 43
Original post by David31415
I think being a true man is knowing when is a good time to cry and when you have to have the stiff upper lip, one of the students at my school recently passed away, then was an acceptable time to cry, breaking up with a 3 year long girlfriend is acceptable but crying over spilt milk you need to buck your ideas up


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This

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Yes, of course it's okay. :smile: So long as it's not 24/7 crying for no particular reason. :wink:
yes, in certain circumstances. ie a funeral of someone you were close to.

or in private over anything else I guess. I did tear up over a video once. (Although it had relevance to my late grandfathers stories of his childhood)
Original post by SnoochToTheBooch
Is your first sentence missing a 'not' somewhere?


Yes indeed.
I find this notion of a 'true man' laughably absurd.

OP: of course it is, I mean, last I heard men were still human beings?
Original post by anosmianAcrimony
Yes indeed.


Is that 'real' crying if you do that? It sounds more like meditation or something. I imagined this thread's context of 'crying' would be people breaking down, being overwhelmed. It's only something I've done when I've been at a dead end. It does feel better afterwards but there's a definite sense of giving up like a pissy-eyed ****ing toddler who didn't get his own way. I wouldn't want to be seen in that state.
Original post by SnoochToTheBooch
How is it not weakness? It's being overpowered by an emotion, losing control over your own body to a degree.


This is what im saying
Original post by silverbolt
So not crying is a sign of strength? Yet women cry so they must be weak? Do you class yourself as a misogynist or just a chauvinist?

Yes it is perfectly acceptable for men to cry. Maybe if we start getting rid of this ludicrous idealology that men cannot cry or seek help with whats troubling them then we can do something to lower male suicide rates which is significantly higher than females and part of that problem is that it is viewed as weak for men to get help.



agreed.

When my father died after fighting caner I cried, i soaked a good friends shirt when i finally cracked after the funeral and no one judged me. There was maybe five people around me both men and women and all i felt was thier love and support.

It is not weak to have emotion.


Or maybe if we stopped babying men and telling them its ok to be soft and stopped allowing single mums to raise boys without a dad we wouldnt have such high suicide rates In the first place.
Go back 100
maybe 200 years ago you would have got a slap round the chops for crying from your parents because it was seen as weak(the old term stop crying or ill give you something to cry about springs to mind) and the suicide rates were nowhere near the level they are in this day and age.
stop telling men being soft is ok.
Original post by matthewduncan
Or maybe if we stopped babying men and telling them its ok to be soft and stopped allowing single mums to raise boys without a dad we wouldnt have such high suicide rates In the first place.
Go back 100
maybe 200 years ago you would have got a slap round the chops for crying from your parents because it was seen as weak(the old term stop crying or ill give you something to cry about springs to mind) and the suicide rates were nowhere near the level they are in this day and age.
stop telling men being soft is ok.


200 years ago we didnt know a fiftieth of what we know now. 100 years ago we didnt know a fifth of what we know now (seeking generally here) about illness and mental illness. The world is a different place.

As for parents, it was not done because it was weak, it was done to shut you up and stop annoying your parents by crying. It was part of the children should be seen and not heard way of parenting.

Your post is innane drivel. You really think that by telling men, dont talk about it, dont get help, dont deal with your problems that they will just go away with nothing more than a shrug of the shoulders and a stiff upper lip? Bull.

It is not soft to seek help with problems and be emotional. It is very much a strong and traditionally men did not seek help. Only a fool thinks the only way a man to be strong is in his biceps.
Original post by matthewduncan
Not for me.
men should be strong not weak.
Control your bloody feelings


How many people ended up killing other people because they started crying?
Original post by matthewduncan
If you keep telling yourself things like this you start to believe it...maybe if you worked on how to be a strong person mentally you wouldnt think like this.


nothing to do with me- i very rarely cry- but not for any reason im just not very emotional. However if i never cried i would be v worried bc that shows a basic lack of empathy.
telling men they cant cry makes them more prone to violence and 'macho' behaviour- its ok for men to cry..
Yeah it's okay. Although I don't think I have ever seen my dad cry! I'd rather see a man who is crying but has a real reason rather than half these girls who just turn on the waterworks for no reason!
I hate crying. It's too embarrassing! I just let it all build up for a few weeks and then let it out in the privacy of my bedroom, although even that I find hard to do.

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Original post by hdindak
nothing to do with me- i very rarely cry- but not for any reason im just not very emotional. However if i never cried i would be v worried bc that shows a basic lack of empathy.
telling men they cant cry makes them more prone to violence and 'macho' behaviour- its ok for men to cry..


Meh we will have to agree to disagree then.
As someone else said the act of crying is being overpowered by emotion and you lose control over your own body.
Hence the reason why tears fall from your face and you look all ugly and stupid.
I just dont understand is it such a bad thing to tell men to be strong mentally 24/7???
Why is that so bad.
Its do able.
Look at me.
Maybe not Peter Parker level but in general yes.
Depends over what.
Original post by matthewduncan
Meh we will have to agree to disagree then.
As someone else said the act of crying is being overpowered by emotion and you lose control over your own body.
Hence the reason why tears fall from your face and you look all ugly and stupid.
I just dont understand is it such a bad thing to tell men to be strong mentally 24/7???
Why is that so bad.
Its do able.
Look at me.


Original post by SnoochToTheBooch
How is it not weakness? It's being overpowered by an emotion, losing control over your own body to a degree. I'm not saying I don't cry, I went for many years without doing it but occasionally I will do it now. I'm not gonna act like it's ever a proud moment. It feels childish, it's what you do in moments of helplessness/fear when you've got no other option. I don't get how people can have a problem with acknowledging that as weakness.

Addressing this idea of it being a weakness particularly on the basis that it is a 'loss of control' that analysis only works if we already accept that men should be actively trying not to cry. Otherwise you are not being 'overwhelmed' or 'losing control' but rather you are allowing yourself to experience whatever it is that is causing you to cry. So what is wrong with having emotions? And what is wrong with feeling/acknowledging/expressing those emotions?
Original post by RandZul'Zorander
Addressing this idea of it being a weakness particularly on the basis that it is a 'loss of control' that analysis only works if we already accept that men should be actively trying not to cry. Otherwise you are not being 'overwhelmed' or 'losing control' but rather you are allowing yourself to experience whatever it is that is causing you to cry. So what is wrong with having emotions? And what is wrong with feeling/acknowledging/expressing those emotions?


Whats right with it?
Ive already gave reasons why its not good so tell me why is it "right"
(edited 8 years ago)