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Cystitus-like symptoms every time we have sex!!!

I've been with my boyfriend just over three months and we have sex once or twice a week. He's my first. I'd say about half of the times we've done it I've got cystitis-like symptoms. Twice I've had full blown cystitis which required antibiotics and lasted about five days.

We used to use condoms - now I have the coil, so we do it without. I get the cystitis both with and without. Lately I've just been getting symptoms for 24 hours ish, so I'm wondering if it's more a matter of being bruised than anything else. He's rough during sex and when he fingers me - but I require a fair amount of stimulation to get off, so I can't really complain about it, but I'm wondering if I'm not 'ready' enough for him? He's only average in size though.

The only times I can think of when I've not had symptoms is either when he's spent a while doing oral/foreplay or when we've had sex whilst I'm bleeding, so there's a natural lubrication. I'm therefore thinking that it's a lubrication issue.

I'm thinking about buying some lube and asking him to use it, but I don't want to offend him. I'm worried that he'll think he's not enough if I suggest bringing lube into the mix as he's quite an insecure bf. But sometimes foreplay is none existant and as soon as he gets hard he'll be thrusting inside of me. Like I said, don't want to hurt his feelings, but I can't carry on with this agony! It brings me to tears.

Do most guys mind using lube?

Reply 1

MediterraneanX

Jesus, I don't know any guy that would turn down lube - its great fun if you use the right amount - it will also feel better for him if you're on the dry side. Also make sure you go for a pee straight after sex and drink lots of water throughout the day. Absolutely DO NOT do what the above poster said - if you use antibac on anything that touches you down there then I can guarantee you will get thrush, cystitis and a pissed off boyfriend! Your longterm goal is to get more foreplay involved - buy a bullet and use it before he tries to go in you - the aim of the game is to make him feel like he's doing amazing things to you (by holding the bullet, or working alongside it etc) so you don't make him feel insecure.

Reply 2

caitlinhughes25

try going to the toilet straight after sex :smile:

it will flush some of the bad bacteria out :smile:

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by caitlinhughes25

try going to the toilet straight after sex :smile:

it will flush some of the bad bacteria out :smile:

Yeah, I have tried that, sometimes I forget so yeah need to be consistent with it. I'm also taking cranberry tablets now.

Could these symptoms be caused by bruising rather than bacteria? I'm wondering whether that's why they go away so quickly.

Reply 4

MediterraneanX

Correct. And using soaps let alone stringent antibacterial lotion changes your ph levels which causes an overpopulation of candida which causes thrush...hence why women often get thrush or cystitis after having bubble baths/using lotions and potions down there. Medical advice is actually to just wash with water in order to maintain your natural ph.

Reply 5

MediterraneanX

There isn't. It's unlikely to have anything to do with his bacteria -it's more likely that because she's dry and he's tough it's causing microtears which then attract bacteria and cause cystitis. OP use lube and see if it improves.