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Original post by ummm
Yeah, I am pretty anxious and reserved in general! I really want to overcome this and my issues with anxiety in social situations. What did your therapy involve? How did you know you were suffering from anxiety?

It's reassuring to hear you were able to overcome this :smile:


Well I had the same problems as you were describing. I had an idea of what I wanted to say in mind, but the sentence came out with the wrong words, missing words and mixed up words. I'd speak really fast with that so people would understand me even less and often have to re-start what I say. Further prior to many social situations I'd overanalyse everything to try and make sure I wouldn't mess up and make a fool of myself (or so I thought). I did feel a great sense of discomfort any time I went into groups. When I'd finished being with them I'd often go home and overthink about what happen, feel worried about whether or not they'd see me in a bad light because of how often I messed up, and it progressed to the point where it was a main thing I would often think about it - I couldn't get away from this attitude. Because I thought about it so often I built up that idea every time I experienced being around other people I would suffer from all this, and it just got worse and worse no matter how many times I tried, so I looked at further guidance from someone who worked in this field well i.e a therapist.

It was an issue of general social anxiety for me and not just the issue of the articulation - that was just one of the many issues I had. So again, might be more of an extreme example than lots of other people.



Approaches are called the following: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy & Compassion Focused Therapy. Basically involves being good to yourself and accepting any mistakes. Often I'd blame myself for a lot of those things going wrong so with this I was able to feel more secure in any interactions I had with people (e.g one way, I'd just laugh at myself in a relaxed way instead of blaming or getting annoyed myself if I said the wrong word). If I got something wrong, I could easily accept it and move forward instead of that negative experience playing on mind and affecting my well-being. Over time I just developed a more positive and relaxed mindset and became quite a lot better with these issues.

Also had a bit of hypnotherapy work which involved training your subconscious not worry about things like this and just put positive thoughts into your head.

Again though, not everyone will suffer from the same troubles so the issues surrounding you may be different to mine and hence the approaches taken will be slightly different if you were to ever consider therapy.

Best of luck with everything. Feel free to ask for any other advice. :-)
Original post by ummm
I've noticed that I really struggle to articulate myself verbally. I just find it so difficult to translate my thoughts into words. They come out all fragmented and jumbled. I frequently can't find the words I'm looking for, and pause and correct myself a lot.

I find it particularly hard to formulate arguments and express my opinions. It's like I just draw a blank and can't string them together.

It's the same when I try and write an essay. I waste so much time shuffling around sentences and rewording them again and again until they feel 'right'... even if they were grammatically correct and made sense in the first place.

I don't find typing stuff like this difficult, probably because I don't feel any pressure for it to sound good.



Any tips for how to get over this?

Thanks

Sometimes i feel the same.:redface:
Original post by Smash Bandicoot
As do I except on paper. That's because my friend regularly tells me to shut up and that I have terrible opinions (on comics and films) when I try to express them. (Was just about to make my own thread on this) I also spent my childhood being talked down to and called retarded and gullible. Were you also bullied OP?


I hate it when parents feel the need to compare you to another sibling. :redface:
Original post by German123
I hate it when parents feel the need to compare you to another sibling. :redface:


OH these were my classmates. :tongue: My parents were loving and supportive, but it was always obvious they ceberated my genius brother (as did my sis) :redface:
Original post by YesAllMen
Well I had the same problems as you were describing. I had an idea of what I wanted to say in mind, but the sentence came out with the wrong words, missing words and mixed up words. I'd speak really fast with that so people would understand me even less and often have to re-start what I say. Further prior to many social situations I'd overanalyse everything to try and make sure I wouldn't mess up and make a fool of myself (or so I thought). I did feel a great sense of discomfort any time I went into groups. When I'd finished being with them I'd often go home and overthink about what happen, feel worried about whether or not they'd see me in a bad light because of how often I messed up, and it progressed to the point where it was a main thing I would often think about it - I couldn't get away from this attitude. Because I thought about it so often I built up that idea every time I experienced being around other people I would suffer from all this, and it just got worse and worse no matter how many times I tried, so I looked at further guidance from someone who worked in this field well i.e a therapist.

It was an issue of general social anxiety for me and not just the issue of the articulation - that was just one of the many issues I had. So again, might be more of an extreme example than lots of other people.



Approaches are called the following: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy & Compassion Focused Therapy. Basically involves being good to yourself and accepting any mistakes. Often I'd blame myself for a lot of those things going wrong so with this I was able to feel more secure in any interactions I had with people (e.g one way, I'd just laugh at myself in a relaxed way instead of blaming or getting annoyed myself if I said the wrong word). If I got something wrong, I could easily accept it and move forward instead of that negative experience playing on mind and affecting my well-being. Over time I just developed a more positive and relaxed mindset and became quite a lot better with these issues.

Also had a bit of hypnotherapy work which involved training your subconscious not worry about things like this and just put positive thoughts into your head.

Again though, not everyone will suffer from the same troubles so the issues surrounding you may be different to mine and hence the approaches taken will be slightly different if you were to ever consider therapy.

Best of luck with everything. Feel free to ask for any other advice. :-)


Solid advice

Paul Gilbert, The Compassionate Mind. Worthy read
Reply 25
Spend 2-3 minutes talking to yourself in the mirror.

When you go to work that next day, you should be offered a job as President. At least that's what happens in The Sims.
Original post by Smash Bandicoot
OH these were my classmates. :tongue: My parents were loving and supportive, but it was always obvious they ceberated my genius brother (as did my sis) :redface:



I can relate. :frown:
I can really relate with this! I also find myself overthinking everything I'm saying so much to the point where it feels like it takes so much out of me even just to be in a normal conversation. When I finish the conversation I overthink every I had said and even the way I said it. I even struggle to have clear thoughts sometimes, let alone putting them into words....

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