Feeling pretty lonely right now :-(

and?

Whenever I feel sad, I look on google images for "funny dog faces".

haha omg

I just want to give cuddles to lonely and upset people, (in the non Jimmy Savile way!).

I mean, that has to be subjective right?!?! There is no way I am hugging an 'upset' person that has just been sentenced to murder and realises they are confined to the space of a bathroom for 30 years. Because, and don't quote me on this, I THINK it may result in imminent pain on my end. Theres nothing like patronising a newly sentenced murderer than hugging them. It's like, as your arms embrace them, you are mimicking the four walls that will soon sum up their existence. Thus, in conclusion, I feel you should maybe consider the matter in which said 'people' are 'upset' and 'lonely' before going up and hugging them. For all you know, they could be lonely because they have the bubonic plague. That would not be a fun hug.

Leprosy is more classic

Who wants to be normal though, eh ? If I am going to die from a disease, if they all felt equally painful, I would choose bubonic. Leprosy is common and easier to control than bubonic. I mean, I want my name to ring in history for something. If it can't be for scientific pursuits, it may as well for being 'that bloke who introduced the plague to Europe and wiped out half the population'!

Point accepted. You're a gentleman and a scholar. Plus people with the name Erwin in the name are generally pretty epic. Erwin Rommel etc.

Yes Euan is a bit of a crap name to have compared to Erwin. Oh well, we must all make do. The best name to have is Hans-Ulrich Rudel, so much of a aviator combat badass that Stalin put a bounty out for him (Rudel got away!) because Rudel had trolled the Soviet Union so much by blowing up a few tanks here, some artillery pieces there, and then some plains, trains auto-mobiles and a battleship.