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LGBT+Soc - *for more serious discussion*

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey everyone. I've got a real coming out problem. I'm a 19 year old guy and I've still not told anybody I'm gay. Nobody suspects it because I don't act in an obviously gay way, I don't have gay mannerisms nor the typical gay high voice, so i'm apparently straight. I've also had a relationship with a girl in the past for nearly 3 years with many break ups. This relationship ended because although I absolutely loved the girl, i couldn't love her on that sexual level. I stayed with her for companionship. People suspected I was gay when I was a child (I wore high heels and pretended I was cruella devill LOL) but they were reassured when I went out with my girlfriend. I realised I was gay when I seemed to find guys more attractive than girls. I'm not interested in girls at all nor am I fascinated by boobs.

    I'm really scared about talking to my dad about this - my mum died years ago and he's a single parent. I have no siblings so he'll never be a grandad, he won't be at my wedding when I kiss my bride. My dad doesn't really like gay people, he makes fun of them all the time (they're easy to make fun of with the way they're portrayed), and I don't know if he'll accept me. It makes me uncomfortable when he talks about me getting a girlfriend, when he taps me saying "that girls looking at you over there". I just give him the excuse that I "don't like humans" and pretend to act antisocial. I feel like I can't be myself around others and I feel socially awkward, like I have to monitor all my actions so people don't suspect I'm gay.

    Any of you guys had similar experiences? I would really appreciate some advice, i want to come out because the problem will only get worse when I get to university. I feel awkward when girls look at me as though they're attracted to me because I am an okay looking guy..

    Thank you for any comments/support!
    Moving to uni is great because you'll be able to meet loads of other LGBT people through LGBT societies/networks, and many will be in a similar situation to you. You might find it easier to tell your dad after you've moved away, so that in the event that he does not react well, you have plenty of people around you to support you.

    Ultimately it's down to you as to what time you think is right. All I will say is this: in my experience, people generally react more positively than you think. If you're not sure how someone will react, they will probably react well. My friends always used to make gay jokes and so I put off telling them for a long time, fearful of a negative reaction, but when I did finally tell them, they were absolutely fine.

    But whatever happens, remember that there's an enormous LGBT community full of people there to support you.


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