Cancer!

My girlfriend on her birthday yesterday broke the news that she's ill with breast cancer. I just didn't know what to say to her when her eyes filled with tears. I love her sooo much and I don't wanna lose her! She's been ringing me but I do not have the courage to talk to her! I'm in a state where I'm confused! I'm angry with her for not telling me about this a bit early, she's been holding a secret all the time. And I just don't have a clue what to do!

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1

VotreAltesse

Original post by Anonymous

There is so much wrong in your way of thinking ... it's almost disturbing.

You "love" her, but you're not at her side now and you don't have the courage to talk to her? What are you afraid of?

Your GF tells you she's got cancer and the first emotion you express is "anger"?!
Shouldn't you be expressing concern? Shouldn't you be supporting her?

I advise you to contact her and ask if there's anything you can do. Ask if she wants you to visit her and take care of her... things like that.

Reply 2

Tiger Rag

Original post by VotreAltesse

Agreed

When my Granddad had cancer, he asked that we acted normal. He didn't want a fuss made and wanted us to carry on as normal and hated us asking how we was. That's a bit difficult when it's something you normally do anyway. (I used to just ask how his day had been or something)

Reply 3

william walker

Be their for he, help and support her in what ever way you can. I honest can't believe you are annoyed at her for not telling you sooner, what does it matter now you know her beating cancer is all that matters. Ring her back and say you will be their when she needs. Be a man.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by VotreAltesse

I'm sorry I didn't mean that I'm angry in that way, I still do love her!
I'm just afraid of losing her! And I just didn't know how to face her, what to speak to her! It's a bit hard you know? We've been together for the past 4 years and 5 months and it's just not the same anymore if that makes sense!
I AM really concerned about her, in fact I was crying with sorrows today. Don't get me wrong, I was just a little bit angry in the beginning but that's it! I want everything to go back to normal. I don't want to make her feel that she's in a terrible condition right now and I just don't know how to do that.
Yeah I will do that, thanks for the advice mate!

Reply 5

Musie Suzie

Original post by Anonymous

We've been together for the past 4 years and 5 months and it's just not the same anymore. I want everything to go back to normal.

Yes, things are different now - you've shown your true colours; that you're just in it for an easy life and don't want to put in the extra effort to support her now that she needs you. Nice one.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Musie Suzie

Nooo, please don't get me wrong. Please do look at this situation from my point of view and please do try to understand me. I have spoken to her and she told me that she wants to be with me and stuff. It's just that I don't know how to face her right now. I wanna make her happy with the time that she's got left in this life with me but I don't know how to!
I DO STILL LOVE HER no matter what! If she wants to marry me then I will do that! Don't get me wrong!

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by william walker

Thank you mate! And I was only a bit angry with her in the beginning for that but now I'm not, don't get me wrong bro! I have and I always will love her no matter what! It's just that I'm shocked and I didn't know how to deal with it!

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

Reminds me of Walk to remember. As far as I recollect, the guy in that was angry too, I know that you're confused and angry and scared, I think it's okay to be that way. I can't believe these people are hating on you, because, if you were a selfish idiot, you wouldn't come and ask for advice. The fact that you did that shows that you want to do something about it.

Call her and have a heart-to-heart, that's all I can say. She needs you but, by gods, you'll need her much more. Trust me.

Reply 9

Musie Suzie

Original post by Anonymous

Okay, well, I don't think it matters what you say to her as long as you make it clear you are there for her and will support her. Your silence is worse than anything.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Yeah my life is pretty much like A Walk To Remember now. Actually, I;m not angry with her, I'm angry on myself for not taking care of her if that makes sense. If I had known about her illness I'd have treated her like my diamond. A minute ago my life was so perfect but now it's just terrible. I never imagined my life would turn out like this. I mean she is so young, she has so many dreams to fulfill and we've only just started living our lives properly. I don't wanna lose her but I know for sure that I will lose her soon because she has stopped receiving treatment ages ago. Life is so cruel!
Ah thank you for trying to understand me mate, much appreciated! Cheers for your support!
I've just been talking to her and she said that she wants me to act like nothing has happened. She just wants to be normal. I'm gonna try and do all the things that she likes. I'm planning to propose her too. I just want to be with her! Nothing more and nothing less!

Reply 11

Lollypop0

Be there for her, the worst thing for you to do it not talk to her and be different around her. Be positive and strong around her, that is the best thing. Hopefully they caught it early and they will be able to help :smile:

Be strong for yourself and her.

Reply 12

Asolare

God some of you are complete jackasses, people react differently to different situations. It's not the most unbelievable thing in the world that he might be upset that she hadn't broken the news to him sooner cause he could have supported her earlier.

Reply 13

chocolatesauce

Pleaseeeee ring her, a relationship is meant to be for the good and bad, you don't just leave when you feel like things are getting hard kmt

Reply 14

inachigeek21

I wish her and you all the best.
God, I wish her cancer goes away.

Reply 15

Spongebob'sPants

OP, dont make this about you. It isnt about how you think or feel.

Be there for her, thats it. Be in her company, tell her you love her and will always be at her side through every step.

Right now its a shock, but all she wants is her bf back so step up to the plate.

Reply 16

_thequeen

For everyone bashing the OP for being angry, it's actually a really common emotion for people being told such bad news. There are so many emotions, that it's impossible for someone to process them all.

Reply 17

L'Evil Fish

Stop bashing the OP.

You're all acting as if you're perfect.

OP, I think it is a natural response, and partly fair. The important thing now is you go and show her you are there for her and fully support her and love her.

Everyone else stop being judgemental pricks, doesn't help anyone.

Reply 18

Wyrley

Dude, you may be scared about it but imagine how's she's feeling? She's facing probably one of the most terrifying situation anyone could. She needs you by her side, you don't even need to do anything special, just be there for her. She's probably feeling completely alone and isolated right now, she needs you to be her sympathetic ear, her shoulder to cry on, the one that's just with her making everything seem ok.

Sure it's difficult for you to get your head round, and you have my deepest sympathies. But it'll be a thousand times worse for her.

I hope she makes a full recovery mate, all the best.

Reply 19

Anonymous #1

Original post by L'Evil Fish

Cheers for your support mate! I'm with her right now, we're spending as much as we can with each other! We're just gonna hope for the best, there's nothing else we can do! I'm planning to propose her soon near her favourite place!