Grammatical English Rules: When to use 'Who' vs. 'Whom'

We're always getting this wrong on TSR (myself included)! Also had a friend ask me to explain it so figured I'd make a thread in case it's helpful to others too

According to Oxford English Dictionaries: "who should be used in the subject position in a sentence, while whom should be used in the object position, and also after a preposition", but a handy basic/less abstract way to think of it is this:

You take a phrase (1), imagine using either he/she or him/her (whichever makes grammatical sense) in an alternative phrase that is otherwise effectively the same, instead of who or whom (2), and then determine which to use accordingly (colour code indicates which to use) (3) e.g.

Example A:

1) Your phrase:
My friend Hannah, wh.. has finally met the man of her dreams

2) Imagine:
My friend Hannah, she finally met the man of her dreams*

3) Determination:
The correct word to use is therefore who

Example B:

1) Your phrase:
My friend Hannah, for wh.. finally meeting the man of her dreams was wonderful

2) Imagine:
My friend Hannah, for her finally meeting the man of her dreams was wonderful*

3) Determination:
The correct word to use is therefore whom

Well this was a lot simpler than I thought, feel pretty stupid for not knowing this now

The girl who thanked me in the above post is most welcome, for it is she for whom the post was primarily intended

To whom this may concern: Happy days are here again

A nerd who tends toward conformity, by the sound of it

Fresh understanding, as per a fair few of those those who have perused this thread

Hate is a strong word

I associate those who worship rules/orderly systems with those for whom conformism is natural.

I'm simple like that

You're welcome, and blessed art thou, one whom Jesus loves :jebus:

We're always getting this wrong on TSR! Also had a friend ask me to explain it so figured I'd make a thread in case it's helpful to others too

According to Oxford English Dictionaries: "who should be used in the subject position in a sentence, while whom should be used in the object position, and also after a preposition", but a handy basic/less abstract way to think of it is this:

You take a phrase (1), imagine using either he/she or him/her (whichever makes grammatical sense) in an alternative phrase that is otherwise effectively the same, instead of who or whom (2), and then determine which to use accordingly (colour code indicates which to use) (3) e.g.

Example A:

1) Your phrase:
My friend Hannah, wh.. has finally met the man of her dreams

2) Imagine:
My friend Hannah, she finally met the man of her dreams*

3) Determination:
The correct word to use is therefore who

Example B:

1) Your phrase:
My friend Hannah, for wh.. finally meeting the man of her dreams was wonderful

2) Imagine:
My friend Hannah, for her finally meeting the man of her dreams was wonderful*

3) Determination:
The correct word to use is therefore whom

Makes perfect sense and concise and desperately true information,thank you habibti

whom is

Is it possible if you could make another thread but for the words 'which' and 'that'. I often use them interchangeably.

The easiest way to differentiate between the two is this, imo:
Which: Used when the information introduced (with which) is helpful but not necessary. This means that one can fully understand what your sentence means without the details provides by which (it's called non-restrictive clause). Eg. The books, which have red pages, have been very helpful - the which clause adds extra information, which is not really necessary for the person you're talking to.
That: Used when the information introduced is necessary - called restrictive clause. Eg. The books that have red pages have been very helpful - the information is required, as it specifies that only books with red pages have been helpful (hence why it's called restrictive).
Got it?
Posted from TSR Mobile

Hannah was my friend, yes. If she wishes to be again then it is she who should honour me by demonstrating complete candour/honesty..